Good topic! Looking back, I see little of love or even kindness in the congregations I grew up in. It was more like living in a soap opera - a really bad one.
One of the reasons I was so drawn to the "world" and "worldly" people was the kindness and interest they showed in me. I had been unpopular with the other kids in our hall for so long that it was intoxicating to realize that I really was somebody that others would truly like and want to be friends with.
Just a small piece to the larger puzzle of how I broke free - but important to me - as all the pieces are.
Real affection was non-existant. I think back of all those smiling faces and I think of bared teeth before an animal strikes. I remember a sister (someone who had alot of issues I think - but was friendly enough). I used to sit next to her at meetings sometimes. I was about 13 maybe, she was much older, late 30s I think.
During a couple meetings she put her arm around the back of my chair to hug me and left it there for a minute or two. Harmless - she wasn't been creepy - just nice. She was unmarried and missed not having children of her own. My mother told me I couldn't sit next to her anymore because people would think we were lesbians. WTF?!? Of all the really stupid, unbelieveable things that came out of my mother's mouth - that has got to be in the top 10!