Posts by FadingAway

49

Another Newbie

by FadingAway in

jw
friends

i've been reading this forum for a while and i felt it was time to post my experience.

i am very comforted when i read others experiences and how similar they are to mine, i don't feel alone.. anyway, i learned the truth in 97, got baptized in 98. all of sudden i was getting prvileges, parts on the ca and dc and had friends that seemed to care about me and i cared for them.

eventually the love started to cool off, the meetings felt like watching reruns of a bland tv show.

FadingAway

Those evil worldly people can be so dastardly, can't they, with their true love and all!

Yes LDH, beware of the worldly people with their clear thinking guided by common sense and compassion!!!

I am in a fading position but I have a lot of JW family.......sigh

codeblue: I know it must be tough, especially with the thought of being shunned by family. Even though I have family to fall back on, I have 2 sons that may complicate matters. My boys are 3 years and 6 months and the thought of losing them because I won't follow a man's org breaks my heart. We'll see what happens...

My family was really cool when I left JW's, no "see I told you so" or anything like that, just "glad you got out of that mess!" :)

DanTheMan: That's great! I know it really comforted me when my parents and sister said whatever has happened has happened in the past. Let's just pick up and move on for the better!

23

What are your family favorite movies?

by jeanniebeanz in

jw
friends

.

you know, the ones you bothered to buy when they came out on video.... the kids have the next week and a half off, and i am looking for input on silly, funny, quirky movies to watch with the fam.

thought i'd start with raising arizona for today for it's sheer silliness, plus i adore nicholas cage.. any suggestions?.

FadingAway

Batman Begins, O Brother Where Art Thou', Napoleon Dynamite, Sponebob Squarepants Movie.

Also "The Orginzation Behind the Name" video produced by the WTS is great for a cheap laugh!

49

Another Newbie

by FadingAway in

jw
friends

i've been reading this forum for a while and i felt it was time to post my experience.

i am very comforted when i read others experiences and how similar they are to mine, i don't feel alone.. anyway, i learned the truth in 97, got baptized in 98. all of sudden i was getting prvileges, parts on the ca and dc and had friends that seemed to care about me and i cared for them.

eventually the love started to cool off, the meetings felt like watching reruns of a bland tv show.

FadingAway

Hi atypical,

Thanks! As far as what martial art to recommend, that is a hard thing to do. I guess it depends on what your goals are and what you want to accomplish in it. I didn't get into the martial arts until I was 19 years old. I was picked on quite a bit when I was in school, so I took Kuk Sool Won in the military because that was being offered at the base I was on. My original intention was to be tough and learn how to fight. I developed this false sense of confidence that I could handle myself in any situation and I always tried to instigate a fight to see if my techniques would work. I was humbled when I sparred a wrestler and learned that it would take more than a few weeks of learning to become proficient. I was also very immature then too but i did some growing up along the way.

After the military, I moved to Vermont to be with my parents and go to college. I found a Chinese Kempo school and enrolled there. I found Kempo by the movie "The Perfect Weapon" with Jeff Speakman. His demonstarion of Kempo techniques on film was very impressive and I was drawn to that. During my Kempo training, I started to read the "Tao of Jeet Kune Do" by Bruce Lee. Bruce was against structured systems or orginizations. He believed that the belt did not signify a persons level of mastery in the martial arts. He encouraged an abandonment of systems and encouraged freedom and creativity. My instructor also felt that way and encouraged us to pick up other martial arts to further our training. From there I picked up Modern Arnis (a filipino stick fighting system) and Brazilian Jiu Jtsu. This helped me to really open my mind and learn from all 3 arts instead of being bound and inhibiting myself in just one art. My base was in punching and kicking, but I also had skills in grappling and weapon manipulation. It is much like the way I feel about the WTS, you may think you learn the truth, but you may feel that you can't grow as a person and feel trapped inside by the contraints of the org.

What you may consider doing is investigating schools around your area. Finding a good instructor is key, you should be able to figure out which ones are in it for the money and which ones are sincere in their teaching. Once you find a good school, stay in for at least 1-2 years to develop a good foundation. From there you can start looking at other arts because you should know the basic punches, kicks, blocks and breakfalls. Your goal in looking at the other arts is to "fill in the gaps" that you think are there that would make you a complete martial artist. But most of all, the martial arts has given me a sense of peace and a sense of personal accomplishment. That is what I miss the most and I can't wait to have that back in my life!

49

Another Newbie

by FadingAway in

jw
friends

i've been reading this forum for a while and i felt it was time to post my experience.

i am very comforted when i read others experiences and how similar they are to mine, i don't feel alone.. anyway, i learned the truth in 97, got baptized in 98. all of sudden i was getting prvileges, parts on the ca and dc and had friends that seemed to care about me and i cared for them.

eventually the love started to cool off, the meetings felt like watching reruns of a bland tv show.

FadingAway

Oh gawd I love George he is my favorite! We watch it also on Spike TV is that what you are talking about? Who is the guy you know, maybe I seen him!

Spike TV is it. His name was Tom Murphy and he lost to Rashad Evans. It was a lame fight, not much action. I didn't know Tom when I trained in BJJ in Vermont, I think he moved there after I left in 96.

I can't wait to see the new TUF with Tito Ortiz and Ken Shamrock. It will be interesting if the hatred for each other lives up to the hype they showed at the last UFC.

49

Another Newbie

by FadingAway in

jw
friends

i've been reading this forum for a while and i felt it was time to post my experience.

i am very comforted when i read others experiences and how similar they are to mine, i don't feel alone.. anyway, i learned the truth in 97, got baptized in 98. all of sudden i was getting prvileges, parts on the ca and dc and had friends that seemed to care about me and i cared for them.

eventually the love started to cool off, the meetings felt like watching reruns of a bland tv show.

FadingAway

My husband and I can't wait for it either! We ordered the one in November, did you see that one it was great?

UFC56 Full Force!!!! Yes it was awesome. Rich Franklin knocked Nate Quarry's lights out!!!! It was funny how Nate kept saying Rich had a weak chin, who has the weak chin now??? Did you keep up with the reality series? They had one fighter that trains with my old BJJ instructor in Vermont, he didn't get far in the show, but I thought it was pretty cool to see him on there.

I do want to see a rematch between Georges St Pierre and Matt Hughes. I think Georges learned his lesson the first time and can prove to be a worthy challenge for Matt. Georges has amazing quickness in his striking and excellent ground skills.

49

Another Newbie

by FadingAway in

jw
friends

i've been reading this forum for a while and i felt it was time to post my experience.

i am very comforted when i read others experiences and how similar they are to mine, i don't feel alone.. anyway, i learned the truth in 97, got baptized in 98. all of sudden i was getting prvileges, parts on the ca and dc and had friends that seemed to care about me and i cared for them.

eventually the love started to cool off, the meetings felt like watching reruns of a bland tv show.

FadingAway

Hey do you watch UFC?

Shoot Yeah!!!!! I'm looking forward to the Chuck Lidell-Randy Coture rematch in Feb 06. I have to watch it while my wife is out of the house, too much for her to take.

49

Another Newbie

by FadingAway in

jw
friends

i've been reading this forum for a while and i felt it was time to post my experience.

i am very comforted when i read others experiences and how similar they are to mine, i don't feel alone.. anyway, i learned the truth in 97, got baptized in 98. all of sudden i was getting prvileges, parts on the ca and dc and had friends that seemed to care about me and i cared for them.

eventually the love started to cool off, the meetings felt like watching reruns of a bland tv show.

FadingAway

lonelysheep: Thanks, you're right I don't feel alone and I'm thankful for that!

AuldSoul: Thanks. I've got a co-worker here who's motto is "Happy wife, happy life." I told her I will never impede her from what she think is right because I have no right to do so.

scne_belly: Thanks for your supporting words! Hopefully my wife will see where I'm coming from and be open minded about what she is learning. It will be tough for her because she was raised in the truth and old habits are hard to let go.

49

Another Newbie

by FadingAway in

jw
friends

i've been reading this forum for a while and i felt it was time to post my experience.

i am very comforted when i read others experiences and how similar they are to mine, i don't feel alone.. anyway, i learned the truth in 97, got baptized in 98. all of sudden i was getting prvileges, parts on the ca and dc and had friends that seemed to care about me and i cared for them.

eventually the love started to cool off, the meetings felt like watching reruns of a bland tv show.

FadingAway

Mouthy, I love you too! Expressing my doubts to my parents was a bitter pill to swallow, but the fact that they listened to me made it much easier. My parents always had their best interest in mind for me and my sister and knowing that there are always there to help me out really helps me understand what unconditional love is.

49

Another Newbie

by FadingAway in

jw
friends

i've been reading this forum for a while and i felt it was time to post my experience.

i am very comforted when i read others experiences and how similar they are to mine, i don't feel alone.. anyway, i learned the truth in 97, got baptized in 98. all of sudden i was getting prvileges, parts on the ca and dc and had friends that seemed to care about me and i cared for them.

eventually the love started to cool off, the meetings felt like watching reruns of a bland tv show.

FadingAway

AlmostAtheist: I always felt guilty about not sending my mom anything on Mother's day! My mom also felt bad because she couldn't celebrate her grandchildrens birthdays. My oldest son turned 3 not too long ago. My wife emailed an article from the WT about why true christians don't celebrate birthdays and holidays. My mom felt more hurt by that article. She always felt she needed to bend for us being JWs to make sure we weren't offended in anyway. I told her to go ahead and celebrate and be happy.

Legolas: Thanks. I always enjoy your posts and look forward to hearing more from you.

YoursChelbie: YES!!! There is more love shown by the noJW relatives verus JWs. JWs could really learn what loyal love is by looking at that example.

Bryan: Thanks, glad to be here.

stopthepain: Thanks, glad to be here!

49

Another Newbie

by FadingAway in

jw
friends

i've been reading this forum for a while and i felt it was time to post my experience.

i am very comforted when i read others experiences and how similar they are to mine, i don't feel alone.. anyway, i learned the truth in 97, got baptized in 98. all of sudden i was getting prvileges, parts on the ca and dc and had friends that seemed to care about me and i cared for them.

eventually the love started to cool off, the meetings felt like watching reruns of a bland tv show.

FadingAway

Hi everyone,

I've been reading this forum for a while and I felt it was time to post my experience. I am very comforted when I read others experiences and how similar they are to mine, I don't feel alone.

Anyway, I learned the truth in 97, got baptized in 98. All of sudden I was getting prvileges, parts on the CA and DC and had friends that seemed to care about me and I cared for them. Eventually the love started to cool off, the meetings felt like watching reruns of a bland tv show. I got married to a "spiritual" sister in 2000 and I thought by having a mate would help my spirituality. Still my feelings hadn't improved and I eventually gave up my privleges and started to decline in my time in the ministry. One issue I always had touble with was with my parents who are not JWs. The begged and pleaded with me not to become a JW, but I was so blinded by the love of the congregation and the promise of living on paradise, that I just felt satan was testing me and I was going to let God reply to satan by keeping my integrity. However, I could never get over the fact that my parents would be destroyed at Armegeddon if they did not become JWs. They did all they could for me to get me where I am today, and for that I am very greatful. I love them with all my heart, and could not understand why God would do that. I spilled my heart to an ELder about this and all I was told is to rely on Jehovah and he will take care of matters. That answer didn't satisfy me.

I started to have serious doubts about the org 3 years ago. I would question the literature with how they were written: quoting secular sources without crediting the source, incomplete quotes that looked like they were taken out of context. Bible prophecies that always seemed to have fulfillment to the JWs only. Stories about how JWs are persecuted..... I also felt that most JWs were not any different from worldy people outside the KH.

Just recently I was able to openly talk with my parents and told them of my doubts and feelings. I wholeheartedly apologized to them for the hurt I caused them. I love them that they always kept in touch with me and never shunned me for my decision. They wanted me to be happy and always kept me in their hearts. I told them that I don't want to be a JW anymore, I am unhappy and it is taking a toll on my health. I put on over 120 pounds because of feeling depressed because I felt I was never good enough to be like Brother Spiritual. Being able to have that conversation with my family lifted a heavy load off my chest and I finally feel I can move forward in a positive direction. I had to tell my wife about my feelings and how I did not want to go to the meetings or service anymore. My main fear of not telling her earlier was that I was afraid she and her family would shun me. She is upset, but she tells me that she is glad that I was honest because she was confused about what I wanted to do with my life. We'll see what happens in the future. I'm afraid there will be pressure from the congregation because of my course of action, but I will deal with it when it comes around. I am going to do whatever I can to support her and not impede her involement in the WTS, I am not her enemy but a source of refreshment to her. I want to be a good husband, but not under the constraints of the WTS.

Like I said, I feel like I can get my life back on track. One thing I gave up was martial arts when I became a JW. I threw away 100s of dollars of books and other material related to it. I was clearing my house of the "demons." I regret doing that to this day. I have found a school and am eager to get going again. I weigh 320 pounds due to the "spirtual" food served at the KH. 1 year from now I plan to be 205 again and be happy about who I am.

JWs like to use the word "encourging" a lot. I never knew what it meant and its application. I do now when I read about other peoples experiences on this forum. Thank you to all who open up and share your experiences with others, it gives me the confidence and courage of what yet may come in my decision to get away from the wts.