Posts by 2Stepper

38

there may be many like defd

by justicehope in

jw
friends

i am a bit nervous making a reply.

i find it a bit challenging to gather my thoughts and express them in the written forum, but her goes!

i have been coming to this site for years.

Welcome Justicehope. I'm new here myself and have the same problem with expressing my thoughts and I was nervous about posting here too but now that I'm an old timer (I'll have twice as many posts as you) it's not so bad.

I have felt anger and hate toward the organization at different times, however I still find in general it is were my faith still lies.

I can identify with those feelings completely. When I left the witnesses I had all sorts of issues with the organization but I still believed that it was the truth and that my not being associated with the organization meant that I had no access to God. After a long time I came to the conclusion that Jehovah's Witnesses did not have the truth but I still had all of their teachings imbeded in my brain so as I set out again to find God I put my faith in finding the correct doctrine and in my own works. Well that didn't work out too well for me either. I studied and researched the Bible untill I was blue in the face and found that the more I learned the less I knew. I also tried working harder at being the kind of person that God would approve of and had the same results that I did as a witness. I could never do enough or well enough. I came to the point where I had all but given up when I finally figured out that I had been putting my faith in the wrong things all along. When I put my faith in Christ and him alone everything got better. I still don't understand a lot of things in the Bible but that's okay. I don't think that God is going to make us take a written review. I still do things that I shouldn't be doing and I don't always do the things that I should be doing and that's okay too because now instead of feeling condemed and unworthy I feel loved and forgiven and I am growing. Little by little I am becoming the kind of person that I tried so hard to be like before only now it's because I want too, not because I feel like I have to or because someone is telling me that I need to live my life according to a bunch of rules that aren't even in the Bible.

Anyway that's where I am now and it only took me 55 years to get here. Welcome to the board and I hope to get to know you better.

20

A question for all the new ones

by Lady Lee in

jw
friends

what made you decide to post?.

i know some lurk for a while - sometimes a long while.

others find the site and do a bit of reading and sign and post immediately.

2Stepper

Hello Lady Lee and everyone else on the board.

I just joined the board this afternoon and was getting ready to make my first post and introduce myself when I saw your question. I was a witness for 12 years and walked out of the Hall for the last time about 14 years ago. For several years I tried not to think about religion or God because I was convinced that I was nothing more than a marshmallow waiting to be toasted. Then I found the old H2O site and found out the truth about the truth. I lurked there for quite a while and then in an effort to purge myself of anything having to do with the witnesses I stopped. That didn't work so I went back to H2O but it had changed. That is when I found this place and I have been lurking here ever since.

I guess it has taken so long to join in is because I was so screwed up I didn't feel that I had anything worth while to comment on. It's just been within the last year that I've really come to terms with everything and finally rid myself of most of my witness programing. Also I was intimidated by the quality of some of the posters here. There are some really sharp people here and being slow of mind and even slower of typing I was comfortable just reading what others had to say.

In answer to your question the main reason that I decided to join in was because I felt indebted to everyone here. This site has helped me more than words can describe and maybe in some small way I might be able to help someone else.