Posts by AudeSapere

39

Need Help - Parent in ICU

by AudeSapere in

df parent is in hospital icu and surgeon wants to give blood.

parent is df for almost 20 and firmly refused blood for personal reasons (spiritual).. .

my concern is that parent is taking strong stand based on outdated jw gb hlc guidelines.

AudeSapere

Not sure if these pics will post or not. I just cut-and-pasted them...

These pics were taken from my house -

During the fire:

After the Fire:

39

Need Help - Parent in ICU

by AudeSapere in

df parent is in hospital icu and surgeon wants to give blood.

parent is df for almost 20 and firmly refused blood for personal reasons (spiritual).. .

my concern is that parent is taking strong stand based on outdated jw gb hlc guidelines.

@Flipper's - Thank you for your thoughts. I was actually thinking that dad might enjoy talking to you as you have a few things in common. He has no one to talk to who can really understand what he is feeling. If you are open to a chat, let me know. I think he would enjoy the Tahoe 'fest but the car drive is not practical. And he's not a camper.

@Mary - Wow! I'm thrilled to see you here. And thank you so very much for the pm. Majorly helpful. I re-read some of the posts about your brother-in-law. While I followed them at the time, I had forgotten how incredibly gut-wrenching that entire situation was. My concerns are a fraction of what you were dealing with. Thank you for you work back then and for taking time to connect with me this week.

@Dagney - I got your text but only just now could respond. May we can do something next weekend or the one after that? Here, there, points in between???

@Scully - Awesome. and thank you for sending Mary.

@myelaine - Interesting. I had not really thought of that. I thought of something similar, but not the local HLC. Thank you for the suggestion.

To all who have inquired and shown concern: Dad is doing very well. A few set-backs this week but overall healing very well. Thank you for helping me help my dad. I don't come this board near as often as I used to. But is sure feels like 'home' once the posting starts. I love this place.

Oh! And as for the fires here. My poor, beautiful mountain is all charred. My house still smells like smoke and my lungs are a little tight but all is good. I don't know what happened to all the deer and rabbits and coyotes. It's been quieter than normal at night without the wildlife. My mountain has been my 'centering agent'. I love to take a few minutes and step outside and just stare at it, take a few deep breaths and just let go. When I did that on Sunday, the soot was still in the air. I gagged, coughed and then cried. My mountain is sick and it makes me sad. And my lemon tree is dead. The mountain will recover. The tree, I think it's a lost cause. Overall, it's been a challenging week.

I don't even want to talk about the nightmares at work. Suffice to say, I'm so happy it's Friday.

Good night and happy Friday to everyone.

-Aude.

39

Need Help - Parent in ICU

by AudeSapere in

df parent is in hospital icu and surgeon wants to give blood.

parent is df for almost 20 and firmly refused blood for personal reasons (spiritual).. .

my concern is that parent is taking strong stand based on outdated jw gb hlc guidelines.

AudeSapere

Scully - That analogy works perfect. Thank you.

And, I responded to your pm.

-Aude.

22

Blood transfusions and JW children in a household with a non-believer parent

by never a jw in

jw
friends

just recently my daughter ask for permission to get baptized.

not knowing the mess that my wife's religion is, i consented.

after a lot of research, i now regret my decision.

AudeSapere

Comatose wrote: No one dies to give you the free gift of a blood transfusion.

Wow! Blood is a free gift from one person to another. No has to die - neither the giver nor the recipient.

What a concept. Simple and succinct.

Thank you.

-Aude.

39

Need Help - Parent in ICU

by AudeSapere in

df parent is in hospital icu and surgeon wants to give blood.

parent is df for almost 20 and firmly refused blood for personal reasons (spiritual).. .

my concern is that parent is taking strong stand based on outdated jw gb hlc guidelines.

AudeSapere

jg - Point well-taken.

Cofty - wow. Nice.

Does anyone remember and have link to the thread that spoke to the 'symbol' being less critical than the real thing? I remember an anology about a married couple with rings on the nightstand. Fire breaks out in the house and the husband rushes to save the rings - symbol of their life, love and commitment - but leaves the wife to die in the fire. He placed greater value on the symbol than the living, breathing wife lying next to him.

Sound familiar to anyone? Help me fine-tune the metaphore?? I thought it was brilliant when I first heard it and it helped me change my heart on the blood issue - LONG after I walked way from the KH.

-Aude.

PS: Huge thank you to the poster who phoned me this afternoon. I will share bit of our conversation with parent tonight.

39

Need Help - Parent in ICU

by AudeSapere in

df parent is in hospital icu and surgeon wants to give blood.

parent is df for almost 20 and firmly refused blood for personal reasons (spiritual).. .

my concern is that parent is taking strong stand based on outdated jw gb hlc guidelines.

AudeSapere

Lost wrote: Your parent is in an awful predicament. and stress is the worst thing for depression. When your at that low point, when dying is easier, there is no strength to fight to live. If you put to much pressure on, parent may shut down. be careful.

Yes. Your assessment is exactly right. It is why I am angry with surgeon for creating drama when a calm discussion is yeilding better results.

Thank you again.

-Aude.

39

Need Help - Parent in ICU

by AudeSapere in

df parent is in hospital icu and surgeon wants to give blood.

parent is df for almost 20 and firmly refused blood for personal reasons (spiritual).. .

my concern is that parent is taking strong stand based on outdated jw gb hlc guidelines.

AudeSapere

@Finkelstein - Got it. And I agree with you. Have already had open discussions with this parent. However, now the rubber meets the road and our discussions are not complete but parent needs to make decision and I no have time or access to sort thru so much data for the specifics. If you can help with links to specific threads that you think made 'ah ha!' points, please share them.

@Shirley - there are multiple siblings, each with own view including active, devote JW. Fortunately, we all agree that each must make their own decisions and then deal with their own consequences - whatever that may be.

@lost - OMFG. Glad your story had a happier ending rather than the tragedy that could have been.

@Happy@last, crazyguy and justia - Thank you. Some good points (apple pie, mercy no sacrifice, flip-flops). I will reference.

Ever grateful for the support and understanding here.

-Aude.

39

Need Help - Parent in ICU

by AudeSapere in

df parent is in hospital icu and surgeon wants to give blood.

parent is df for almost 20 and firmly refused blood for personal reasons (spiritual).. .

my concern is that parent is taking strong stand based on outdated jw gb hlc guidelines.

AudeSapere

Did not mean to just single out just Cofty, but those quickly caught my eye.

Jg and Rebel - Also very help, thank you. I did look at ajwrb yesterday but too much info to wade thru with limited internet access at hosp.

The California 'Springs Fire' started in my neighborhood so I am dealing with that, respiratory issues at home and parent in hospital and no internet so really REALLY appreciate the links and succinct 'conceptual' talking/thinking points to share with parent.

In pm, one poster gave me this link from 2005: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/journal-church-state-wt-no-blood-expose

The above link discusses 'Jehovahs Witnesses Blood Transfusions and the Tort of Misreprehension'.

Does anyone have the full article of a link to it?

@Skeeter (and others suggesting that the surgeon do some reading) - not going to happen. I am dealing with dismissive, arrogant, and now defensive Cardio-Thorasic surgeon. Cannot say more, but I have delicate balance and trying to logically provide balanced and updated info on current WT allowance of fractions to parent so that I confident that parent is making an informed consent not based on emotion, guilt, fear or out-dated cult directives and sanctions. [surgeon is trying to bully into submission and that bullying triggers the martyr response. Surgeon flat out refuses to discuss, let alone research.]

Although, I might be able to leave him (or the other doctor) a copy of the Kerry Lauderbock article from 2005, if someone can email it to me or provide link.

Thanks again for all the help.

-Aude.

39

Need Help - Parent in ICU

by AudeSapere in

df parent is in hospital icu and surgeon wants to give blood.

parent is df for almost 20 and firmly refused blood for personal reasons (spiritual).. .

my concern is that parent is taking strong stand based on outdated jw gb hlc guidelines.

AudeSapere

Thank you for your thoughtful responses. For a variety of reasons I don't want to address each response separately - out of respect for my parent.

20 years since DF'g with an aging guilt-laden, depressed person in pain and just out of surgery is complicated. Parent is mostly JW apologist but I softening the stance thru gentle and logical discussion.

Cofty's comments, I will share this with parent:

Is it worth trying to reason with parent that the prohibition on blood is based on a simple misunderstanding?, Did that w/ good success.

It was fine to eat unbled meat as long as the animal had not been killed - if it was found "already dead". Lev 11:38,39 Good to note.

Blood only had significance if a life had been taken therefore it does not apply to transusions. Excellent point. Must remember this.

I wish you well. Thank you

39

Need Help - Parent in ICU

by AudeSapere in

df parent is in hospital icu and surgeon wants to give blood.

parent is df for almost 20 and firmly refused blood for personal reasons (spiritual).. .

my concern is that parent is taking strong stand based on outdated jw gb hlc guidelines.

AudeSapere

DF parent is in hospital ICU and surgeon wants to give blood. Parent is df for almost 20 and firmly refused blood for personal reasons (spiritual).

My concern is that parent is taking strong stand based on outdated JW GB HLC guidelines. parent was not aware of "fractions" being allowed. Parent suffers from chronic pain and severe depression but lately has reengaged in life and has shown interest in doing fun but simple things. I do not believe that this parent is ready to die.

I am hospital with very limited internet access and hoping some of you can provide simple, non-emotional advice and encouragement for me to share with parent. Brief synopsis of increasing permissiveness of blood for jws can help.

Calm and thoughtful former elders, ministerial servants and HLC people i absolutely welcome your comments and if you are willing to talk to on phone please pm me.

Aude.