AudeSapere

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Posts by AudeSapere

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  11

  Remembering SuziDrums

  by 3rdgen in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  hello friends,.

  i don't post here much anymore but still check in to read from time to time.

  yesterday i thought i would send a fb msg.

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  AudeSapere

  Oh no! That is so sad. I'm so very sorry.

  
  
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  34

  Just peeking in for a bit...

  by Jidders in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i rather apprehensively would like to say hello.. i've been raised somewhat in the truth,one of my parents is rather rather strong in the beliefs but could honestly be considered pomi with how active they are and their side of the family comes from a line of witnesses, the other parent was but faded a long time ago.

  as such i was taught quite a bit of jw teachings between family and off and on again bible studies.

  recently i had a serious emotional break down over a few months after said pomi parent had advised me that they would not attend my wedding should that day come (i also had recieved a text from my bible teacher i hadnt heard from in a year or two giving a scripture) and it sorta all sank on me that my activity over the last few years was not really jw material.

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  AudeSapere

  This:

  the fact I'm always scared and depressed when doing anything meeting/study related has left me insanely weary

  This should be a big warning sign to you.

  Don't ignore your own keen internal sensors.
  

  Are you familiar with the term 'cognitive dissonance'? You seem to be describing some of the classic symptoms.
  

  
  
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  34

  Just peeking in for a bit...

  by Jidders in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i rather apprehensively would like to say hello.. i've been raised somewhat in the truth,one of my parents is rather rather strong in the beliefs but could honestly be considered pomi with how active they are and their side of the family comes from a line of witnesses, the other parent was but faded a long time ago.

  as such i was taught quite a bit of jw teachings between family and off and on again bible studies.

  recently i had a serious emotional break down over a few months after said pomi parent had advised me that they would not attend my wedding should that day come (i also had recieved a text from my bible teacher i hadnt heard from in a year or two giving a scripture) and it sorta all sank on me that my activity over the last few years was not really jw material.

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  AudeSapere

  Welcome to JWN!

  Just take things slow.

  Truth is Truth and should be able to hold up under discussion and review.

  There is no need to snap to judgement one way or another. This is a great place to ask questions and get variety of feedback.

  Sounds like you are relatively young. Here are a few suggestions for you:

  If not yet baptized, stay that way. There is absolutely no rush. If you are being coerced, that should be a warning sign. Jesus was 30. JW's will use baptism against you if you later find that they are not as 'christian' as they claim.

  Armageddon is not just around the corner. Make plans for a long life in this system. Get an education. Work on a real career. Take real vacations. Don't waste all your free time in field service.

  Build a nice life for yourself. Make friends with people who do not believe exactly as you do. You can inspire each other and test each others views. You don't have to change their view. You don't have to let them change you. Just enjoy their company and have fun.

  Don't try to challenge or 'enlighten' your JW family and friends right now - it's too easy for this to backfire on you and you will likely find yourself marked and/or isolated. Later on, once you are clear on what you want in your life, you can decide if you want to share your thoughts with family and friends.

  Be cordial, attentive and polite to family and JW friends but make establishing your own life (without their control) your very first priority.

  To understand some of what goes on with high-level decision making in the org, get the book 'Crisis of Conscience' by Ray Franz.

  I was on antidepressants during my last few years in the org. This site did not exist at the time. I cried a lot. Life was not fun. I knew of things going on in my cong and neighboring ones, too. One Sunday I got up in the middle of a meeting, said a little prayer as I walked out the door of the KH ("Jehovah, you know better than I do why I cannot stay here anymore") and I never really went back.

  Finding JWN was critical to me validating my thoughts. This site was so incredibly active 15 years ago. Look through some of the old threads.

  JWFacts is a great site. The site-owner has very high integrity and is usually quite willing to address specific questions of accuracy and authenticity.
  

  Post when you can. I hope you find what you need to help you gain clarity of thought and lightness of heart.

  Again, welcome to JWN. It's nice to have you join us, even if just occaisionally.

  -Aude Sapere (meaning: Dare to Know; Dare to Have Wisdom/Understanding; Dare to Think for Yourself.)

  
  
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  25

  Want to read the Montana Nunez v. Watchtower Trial Transcript? It's now available to read

  by AndersonsInfo in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  the trial transcript of nunez v. watchtower (426 pages) has been made available from scaars which is the acronym for a new a 501(c)(4) lobbying corporation, sexual child abuse - advocates for reform and safety (scaars).. .

  the scaars corporation was formed october 3, 2018 by barbara anderson and former elder, roger bentley and his wife, karin.

  on the home page of the scaars website, scaars.org, you will find information that explains the goal of the movement - scaars: "changing laws - changing lives.".

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  AudeSapere

  I look forward to reading this.

  Thank you, Barbara, Roger and Karin!!
  
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  38

  Child sexual abuse suspect arrested in T.O.

  by Tahoe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  https://www.vcstar.com/story/news/2018/12/13/child-sexual-abuse-suspect-arrested-t-o/2305199002/ .

  a 69-year-old thousand oaks man facing multiple sexual abuse charges by the ventura county district attorney’s office was arrested last week, authorities said.. steven skyler abbott was arrested dec. 6 after months of investigation into the reported sexual abuse of two thousand oaks girls, according to the ventura county sheriff’s office.

  in november, the ventura county district attorney’s office filed multiple felony sexual abuse charges against abbott, including two counts of continuous sexual abuse, one count of lewd acts upon a child and one count of forcible lewd acts upon a child.. he is also facing multiple felony enhancements and special allegations related to his charges.. the investigation began in september, when the sheriff’s agency received a report of suspected child crimes.. a 16-year-old victim alleged that she was sexually abused by abbott when she was between the ages of 5 and 11, sheriff’s officials said.. sexual assault unit detectives subsequently identified a second, 24-year-old victim who reported that abbott had abused her when she was between the ages of 3 and 7, authorities said.. the sheriff’s agency said the victims and their families had come into contact with abbott through the kingdom hall of jehovah’s witnesses in newbury park.. investigators submitted their findings to prosecutors, who filed felony sexual abuse charges against abbot on nov. 16, officials said.. on nov. 28, an arrest warrant was issued for abbott.. the suspect was eventually arrested at his home on dec. 6 and booked into ventura county jail.

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  AudeSapere

  I missed this post and just learned of the arrest yesterday.

  This KH is VERY close to me. At one point, when I was very depressed and struggling to stay in the org, this is one of the Halls I considered transferring to.

  Horrific shame that these situations continue to occur.

  So glad the 16 year old came forward.

  Might consider going to the courthouse on Thursday.
  
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  2

  Newbury Park Man Accused of Child Molestation

  by AudeSapere in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so this was in my local weekly 'throwaway' newspaper today.. guess what religion?.

  https://www.toacorn.com/articles/newbury-park-man-accused-of-child-molestation/.

  newbury park man accused of child molestation.

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  AudeSapere

  Ahh. Thanks for the link, JP.

  I did not see the prior post and was really surprised that my google search did not show the article as posted in the Ventura County Star.

  Must need to brush up on my search skills.
  
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  2

  Newbury Park Man Accused of Child Molestation

  by AudeSapere in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so this was in my local weekly 'throwaway' newspaper today.. guess what religion?.

  https://www.toacorn.com/articles/newbury-park-man-accused-of-child-molestation/.

  newbury park man accused of child molestation.

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  AudeSapere

  So this was in my local weekly 'throwaway' newspaper today.

  Guess what religion?
  

  https://www.toacorn.com/articles/newbury-park-man-accused-of-child-molestation/

  Newbury Park man accused of child molestation

  Suspect met his victims through church, police say
  

  | December 13, 2018

  Acorn staff report
  

  A 69-year-old Newbury Park man will be arraigned next week on charges that he molested two underage girls he met through church.

  

  Steven Abbott Courtesy of TOPD

  Steven Abbott was arrested Nov. 28 after a three-month investigation by the Thousand Oaks Police Department’s sex crimes unit.

  Police say they uncovered the crimes after a 16-year-old came forward in September to say Abbott, whom she met at Kingdom Hall of Jehovah’s Witnesses in Newbury Park, sexually abused her from the time she was 5 until she turned 11.

  A resulting investigation uncovered a second female, now 24, who told police that Abbott abused her over 15 years ago, when she was between the ages of 3 and 7. The woman also said she and her family met and associated with Abbott through the Newbury Park Kingdom Hall.

  According to court records, Abbott is being charged with two counts of continuous sexual abuse of a child, one count of committing a lewd act on a child and one count of committing a forcible lewd act on a child.

  He was being held on $250,000 bail and is due in court Dec. 27 for his arraignment.

  TOPD is looking for other victims. Those with information related to Abbott may call Detective Darin Yanover at (805) 494-8229.
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  36

  Faders Needing a Great One Liner

  by Solzhenitsyn in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  so our family fade is well under way.

  we changed congregations as regular attenders and left in good standing with those giving hugs and kisses simply knowing we "needed a change".

  we moved to a neighboring congregation that is out of our original region knowing we would see no one and the two boe's wouldn't really have immediate dealings.

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  AudeSapere

  I think a modified #1 is actually the best case.

  Modify it by also looking them in the eyes and saying "We are doing great!. The kids are busy, happy, healthy and growing up so fast! My wife has a job she loves and our marriage has never been better. We just got back from [some recent family trip] or yesterday we went hiking at [local trail].

  The trick is not to just say 'Hi, we're fine', and then just dodge away like you are guilty of something. You want to leave them thinking "Wow! What good vibes/energy from Solzhenitsyn." And mentioning some generic references to a busy and full, happy and FUN life leaves them wondering how is that possible. You are supposed to be miserable.

  Congrats on your advancing fade.
  
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  30

  Our daughter was free to make her own choice.

  by StephaneLaliberte in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  when eloise dupuis gave birth to her son in 2016, there were complications where a blood transfusion would have saved her live.

  however, she refused and died; to the horror of the medical staff and the entire province of quebec.. two years later, there was a change in politics and the topic came back up in the media.

  the parents of eloise dupuis, obviously exhausted by the media coverage, wrote a comment to a well known news paper in quebec.

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  AudeSapere

  marking for later.
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  13

  My sermon at Valley Unitarian Universalist Congregation

  by rawe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it has been awhile since i have visited the forum.

  since the fall of 2013 i've been attending the unitarian universalist congregation in chandler, az.

  i became a member in 2015. this past september i gave the sermon.

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  AudeSapere

  Thank you for sharing your talk with us and for sharing a bit of your journey.

  The cruise ship analogy was so clear. AFTER the cruise, answering questions from excited friends who want to hear about all the wonderful sights and experiences only to tell them you did not get experience much because of being so occupied with prepping and warning of something that would never happen.

  Thank you again. It seems you have found a warm group with whom to associate.