Posts by DannyBear

47

Suicidal fear of rejection.

by seven006 in

jw
friends

the fear of rejection has once again controlled my life and my actions in an unintentional act of self destruction brought on by how i was raised to view life.

i have come to the conclusion that i will probably be battling this psychological whirlpool of self sabotage for the rest of my life and i do not think i have the ability to completely eliminate it.

talking about it here is a start.

DannyBear

Dave, Dave, Dave,

You did this to help Joelbear didn't you? You sly devil.

Well damn man, if you didn't help him, you sure as hell did me!

Iam not buying Farkel's analysis that you guys are freaks. Talented nerds now that may have some merit.

You did it, you cut right through all the bullshit, and got right down to the nitty gritty. I so vividly remember the very first door my mother made me knock on. I was somewhere around the age of 5 and could barely put two or three coherent sentenaces together. But I can still remember every word my mother taught me to say "Hello, my name is Danny and I have the latest copies of the Watchtower and Awake magazines, they are 5cents each, will you take them.(?)" I was lucky that lady was very kind and even smiled when she paid me the dime. I can remember shaking and looking up at my mom for support.

30 yrs later I was basically giving the same presentation. I hated every moment of door to door activity from that day forward. Oh yeah I could put on the happy face, take the lead, do all the stuff a good jw boy should do, but the reality of the sheer humiliation, the fear of once again being so damned different from everyone else........absolutely requires for your own sanity....that one adopt an attitude of superiority.

It's funny just from reading your telling story, it gels in my mind, why my entire jw family is the way they are. They had to be tough, they had to assume they were better, they had to take a black and white approach to life, it is in fact the only way one can withstand the humiliation. Flag salute, national anthem, birthday's, christmas, jeez man we had to reject every solitary thing that is considered by the entire world to be normal in our lives, and yet still make an appearance of being normal?????????????????? How the hell did we do it?

Thanks Dave for opening up your heart to all of us. You may not be getting any sage advice (except maybe from Farkel) but you sure did a number on this guys mind.

As to women. I alway's have loved them, even when I was 5, I must have smiled just right.........the lady did take the mags. So I wont bore you with my story. I have an ex who is still a jw, but even more screwed up now than when we were together. Not really any consilation, for I don't wish that kind of mind warp......even on her!

All I can say is when I met T, 20 yrs ago TODAY...... I saw her long auburn hair tossing back accross the dance floor, sitting there smoking Pall Mall's, and when she turned her blue eye's to me, it was all over.

T and I never did get married, and I think it is because of what you pointed out so well. She has said yes to my question.....would you still marry me now?.....almost every year we have been together, but for some reason, I can't get up enough ball's to do it. Iam a woosy eh? Or could it be that Iam afraid of rejection? I think so.

Dave your a gem. Your words here today on our aniversary, helped me understand myself even more, so you also helped T. Thanks from us both.

Danny

42

Screwing up folks lives

by JT in

jw
friends

this is an amplification and adjustment in understanding of what appears in the watchtower of november 15, 1974, pages 703-704, and of february 15, 1978, pages 30-32. those who acted on the basis of the knowledge they had at the time are not to be criticized.

nor would this affect the standing of a person who in the past believed that a mates perverted sexual conduct within marriage amounted to porneia and, hence, obtained a divorce and is now remarried.

with this one little footnote in the wt it wiped out folks very lives- notice they refer to such a major doctrinal shift as an "amplification and adjustment in understanding".

DannyBear

Well damnation if it ain't the 'postman' himself! I suppose you had similar thoughts about those customer's on your route, that happened to subscrible to unapproved reading material like 'Playboy', 'The Christian Science Moniter' ......did you remove the brown wrapper's from the WT and Asleep mags for the householder, Friday?

Well since you stopped being an active jw in the 70's, I suppose that was the only approved way of salving your consience, from lack of participation in the preaching work.....so it's ok little man, you did what you could. Iam sure your 'sky god' will forgive your weakness.

So before you go throwing around alot of critique about poster's here, you should take stock of your double standards, and when and if you do.......make up your mind who you really are!

Danny

Edited by - DannyBear on 4 December 2002 10:53:28

42

Screwing up folks lives

by JT in

jw
friends

this is an amplification and adjustment in understanding of what appears in the watchtower of november 15, 1974, pages 703-704, and of february 15, 1978, pages 30-32. those who acted on the basis of the knowledge they had at the time are not to be criticized.

nor would this affect the standing of a person who in the past believed that a mates perverted sexual conduct within marriage amounted to porneia and, hence, obtained a divorce and is now remarried.

with this one little footnote in the wt it wiped out folks very lives- notice they refer to such a major doctrinal shift as an "amplification and adjustment in understanding".

DannyBear

gumby,

***I also like the way they say......."who in the PAST believed". What they mean is OUR past understanding that WE told you to believe.***

The wt society has utilized this form of cop out since it's inception. All of the past guru's CTR, da Judge, Nathan, Freddie, and now the geriatric 'boys club' gb, have conditioned the average joedub to accept this as a form of appology.

Actually it is the most lame, totally dishonest, attempt at diverting the reader from the real 'truth'. For a religion that touts 'the truth'......they seldom practice, what they teach.

I guess it is tough to admit a wrong, especially when you have proclaimed world wide in 200 languages, in millions of publications, that your words are the manifestation of God's own thoughts on the matter.

Once you commit to that first lie, damn its hard to deny it!

Danny

37

people df'd for having sex

by placebo_apothecary in

.

was it worth it?.

DannyBear

LB,

*** You see the JW's make it seem like everything makes perfect sense. It doesn't. Nothing really does***

That was a really important comment for placebo to ponder. Jw's are so emeshed in trying to live up to draconian standards, policies, rules, elder's views, not to mention isolated bible verse and interpretations that change from year to year, that they really never see the obvious. Noone has the answers, noone has the corner on righteousness, no matter how much they lay claim to having it.

Placebo you would do very well to listen to someone like Amanda. Her words ring loud and clear, as someone who just may be of help. Not to mention she just offered you something few (as I can recall) newbies are afforded......an intent listening ear. Maybe you were to cavalier in your dismissal of her offer??? Think?

Danny

31

I'm going to be struck by lightening!

by WildHorses in

jw
friends

i lied.. anyway, i called him this morning and told him i couldn't clean it today but would tomorrow be alright?

i said i was sick.

which in a way isn't a lie.

DannyBear

Shari,

***held back from saying things I shouldn't. Which is a good thing because after I sit back and think, I realise it wasn't worth getting so upset in the first place***

Yeah but, I will tell you what.........if you ever do lose your cool.....nobody better say a damn thing about it!!!!!!!!!!!!..........after hearing about the 9 bathrooms, and non-stop cleaning.....if anybody has a license here to spout off some steam.........you my dear lady are entitled.

Somehow I get the feeling your little business will grow into just what you have imagined for it. Anyone willing to invest so much time and effort, can accomplish whatever you set your mind to. Go get em Shari!

God I love people who take responsibility for thier lives.

You set a good example for us all

Danny

31

I'm going to be struck by lightening!

by WildHorses in

jw
friends

i lied.. anyway, i called him this morning and told him i couldn't clean it today but would tomorrow be alright?

i said i was sick.

which in a way isn't a lie.

DannyBear

Shari,

It is obvious you have alot of happy customer's. When your work week starts extending into the 7 day arena........you need some help girl! I know all the pitfalls with hired help, but you need some time to relax.

I understand when you have had some lean times (almost inevitable in a service business), you are reticent to turn any business down...........god forbid, next week the phone may not ring at all! I know, I know the feeling.

Anyway I think you have one of the most physically demanding jobs there is. How you do this work, dealing with persnickity customer's, then come home to your computer and maintain your 'cool' like you do is worth of some sort of reward!

I vote we extend 'Lilacs' a special moniker in honor of her disposition, how about EMPRESS of KINDNESS and SUPREME AMBASSADOR OF GOOD WILL.

Danny

14

Not Exactly "Announcing" Jehovah's Ki...

by BeautifulGarbage in

jw
friends

as i stood at my kitchen window, i could see them walking by the front of my house.

are they going to make that turn and start the small climb up the driveway?

"groan"!

DannyBear

Beautiful,

***Me: "Uh, nothing much." (Wow! Such eloquence! Such language command! Yet, it IS the truth)

Mary: "Nothing much? Can I share a scripture with you"***

Apparently your 'nothing much' just zinged right over thier heads eh? Another example of how very little they really care for the householder's opinion. The fact that she even made a feeble attempt at a questioning response to your comment, was significant. Yet she continued to give her well rehearsed sermon, just like she does when giving the impromptu talk #3 in the ministry school.

Jw's truly are trained in the art of absorbing obejtions, or should I say ignoring them.

Your anology of salesmen being tight with the pricing is a very good one as respects jw methods at the door. They will do everything in thier power to twist, turn, or redirect the conversation towards the ultimate 'sales close'. 'You can read more about a paradise earth here in the pages of the ...........we ask only a 25cent contribution to cover the cost of publication'. No thanks, is not acceptable at this point in the sermon (I mean how many actual sermons does a jw get a chance to deliver), so they (we used to) simply conclude ' would you read them if I just left them, at no charge?'

Obviously the jw know's that if you don't take them at even on a no charge basis, the mags will continue to dog ear and turn brown in thier book bag..........and everyone knows that they will have to pick up the latest mags at the next service meeting.

If I would have saved all the publications thrown away in my 30yrs as a jw, I could have helped at least 5 troops of boy scouts, with an entire years supply of 'paper drive'.

Danny

edited to add this ps: I just zoomed in on your new picture, and well aheheemenenheee I have not recovered just yet......damn woman your absolute temptress!

Edited by - DannyBear on 3 December 2002 22:4:27

33

Pedophilia and the FDS

by LoneWolf in

as you may know, there are ones at the top of the organization that stand accused of pedophilia, etc.

as i remember, both greenlees and chitty have been exposed as such.. now there are accusations that ted jaracz is also.. ask yourself something: how did jaracz get to be at the top of a "christian" organization when almost nothing about his personality reflects anything that is christian?

which of the fruitages of the spirit could you associate with his conduct?.

DannyBear

Hello back Waiting,

I understand and appreciate what you said.

I was trying to focus on LoneWolf's reasoning as to the accused/rumored FDS member's complicity. Also some have claimed that solid proof does exisit in the matter of TJ.

Imo the time for emotion, marching, banner's etc is over. It served it's purpose, just as you have described by your daughter's reaction.

It is now time for as many of those 5,000 abuse victims as possible, to make thier cases. I think that is in the works as we speak.

Danny

17

Donkey

by donkey in

jw
friends

simon, .

i emailed you last night with regard to what i am about to post over here.

i refer you to this thread

DannyBear

Donkey aka Gravedancer,

I like you better in your 'donkey' suit.

Danny

189

Donkey's never-ending atheism thread

by donkey in

wih the permission of simon, i would like to start a thread to act as a collection of thought, quotes and miscellany on atheism and agnosticism.

there are so many other threads on this subject but no one place which one can go to on here.

i have much to share - enjoy and contribute with me please.give me the storm and stress of thought and action rather than the dead calm of ignorance and faith.

DannyBear

Donkey,

I wasn't trying to prove anything. Both question's yours and mine can be discected to pieces.

Your's with simple comparison's to human parents, and thier influence or power over thier children. etc etc.

There does remain the question of 'chicken before the egg'.......as regards belief or non belief in God.

That was my only point.

Danny