Posts by jambon1

3

Blood Transfusions

by ian360 in

jw
friends

hey guys,

i suspect this one might come under quite a lot of criticism so i might need to protect myself a little here.

i'm a 32 year old guy who met a girl some time ago.

jambon1

This was something that I simply couldn't stand the thought of and if that happened, I wouldn't agree with this.

Welcome.

Dont EVER accept this doctrine from her. She is speaking about long held teachings from her childhood but they are deeply flawed. Children & parents HAVE died because of this. Sacrificed for a man made organisation.

You`re feelings as above will terrorise you if you have to watch your kids live the JW life.

PS - Gently ask her if she would feel ok about having nothing to do with her 18 year old son if he was disfellowshipped for having unmarried sex. Yes, having nothing to do with him, EVER again, as long as he lived (unless he came back to repent as a JW). Crazy I know, but this is the doctrine. Personally, I would rather tear my heart out. You will only understand when you have your own kids, how utterly unloving and cruel this 'bible doctrine' is.

PPS - When challenging her on anything, just say you heard about such & such a thing in the paper or from a workmate. NEVER SAY YOU READ IT ON INTERNET - BARRIERS WILL IMMEDIATELY GO UP.

Jambon

13

Please help me. Advice re. children

by jambon1 in

jw
friends

i have been out for a few months & have been doing the supportive role for my wife who still goes to most meetings and is taking the lead with our 2 kids.

the supportive role has cushioned the mental anguish for my wife and i would not have wanted to be frank about my disbelief in god & the wts, it would have put a tremendous strain on our relationship.

at the moment she is hoping i will come back.

jambon1

Thanks so far.

Im not d/fd and my family are`nt in the truth. Its was just us. So I have a measure of freedom to discuss stuff but at the moment she is VERY sensitve to some things I have brought up in a gentle manner. We cant really discuss much at the mo. She knows my vies on blood, d/fd, education & my disdain for the 'everyone is going to die' doctrine. I HATE it all.

The problem is that many are supportive of her. We have some good and loyal friends over the years who I dont think will turn away. Maybe I need to go down the flawed doctrine route?

Its hard at the mo. I just want them all out. At one time I worried about our kids future in the `world` but I know we are level headed enough without the truth to still bring them up properly & with a good future. There are lovely people in the bad old world. I just want them to be normal kids.

38

New boy here.

by LtCmd.Lore in

i'm 16 years old and have been raised as a jehovahs witness.

i'm currently considered a very spiritual brother, and have an assignment comming up for the memorial.

but i realized it was all a bunch of crap last year at some time.

jambon1

As others have said, you can think for yourself. This is a good thing. The WTS tries to convince us that we willl only come to harm for 'independant thinking'. In reality, many, many people have made a lovely life for themselves outside the org. They have not suffered in any way & do not hold the WT guilt shackles which cause so much unhappiness to the human mind.

It is`nt easy leaving though but be determined - it is the best decision ever. We are ALWAYS here for you - keep posting.

J

13

Please help me. Advice re. children

by jambon1 in

jw
friends

i have been out for a few months & have been doing the supportive role for my wife who still goes to most meetings and is taking the lead with our 2 kids.

the supportive role has cushioned the mental anguish for my wife and i would not have wanted to be frank about my disbelief in god & the wts, it would have put a tremendous strain on our relationship.

at the moment she is hoping i will come back.

jambon1

I have been out for a few months & have been doing the supportive role for my wife who still goes to most meetings and is taking the lead with our 2 kids. The supportive role has cushioned the mental anguish for my wife and I would not have wanted to be frank about my disbelief in god & the WTS, it would have put a tremendous strain on our relationship. At the moment she is hoping I will come back. I have been firm & told her I will not be at the memorial. Things in our household are generally at ease as I continue to 'abstain from JW activity'.

The thing is, as I contemplate the future, I simply do not want my kids to be raised as JW`s. They are aged 4 & 2. I worry about the bullying because of not taking part in normal stuff and the mental anguish that I think a child faces as a result of being brought up in the org. My wife is a liberal JW.

My wife has already spoken however of her 'concern' over activities that I would want to do with my kids. For gods sake, I just want to raise them as normal kids, doing normal things on a day-to-day basis. This pisses me off no end & I can see it causing problems between my wife & I in the future.

What can I do though. Do I be firm and just insist that I do what I want with the kids anyway? Its ironic that I am going to be limited in my activities but she will take them to 3 meetings a week, f/s, assemblies & conventions, etc, etc, etc.

I just dont want to end up with a couple of 16 year old pioneers - its such a waste. What can I do to show them that normal life is best.

Anyone in a similar situation?

23

What was the last straw?

by poodlehead in

jw
friends

i am new to this sight and thought i would get to know some of you.

so what was the last straw that made you leave?

now that i started this i should give mine.

jambon1

I really felt a gross lack of love amidst all the petty minded issues that went on.

Got sick of the 'take our shit & the onus is on YOU to be forgiving'

Got tired/mentally weary of the 'nothings ever good enough' mentality - I did feel guilty all the time.

Realised that 'god', if there was one, would never approve of d/f, blood issue etc etc.

Realised that there could not be a god because of the masses of suffering found in generations of human existance. - If I was what he claimed to be, not 1 child, not 1, would scream for mummy because of a rapist.

Realised I was happier without the WT shackles on mind & heart within 1 week of stopping meetings, thus, I will NEVER return to that unhappy, depressing, time of my life.

86

My Story

by XJW4EVR in

i was adopted into a jw family in southern california.

my birth mother gave me up after 6 months (the terms mom & dad refer to my adoptive/real parents).

she gave me up due to the fact that she already had a three year old boy, and back in the late sixties it was not as socially acceptable to be a single mother.

jambon1

Thank you sooooooo much for this story. We all want to hear more please.

You have been very brave in your life.

J

48

Hi

by UNCLEAR in

this obviously is my first post, i actually feel like i may be sick but i felt compelled to post.

only if to just say hello.. my life has been anything but boring, pioneered for years, brought several family members into "the truth", and find myself unable to have studies anylonger because i feel unsure about the stand i have taken all these years.. i was previously married, my husband left the organization for various reason, we divorced and i recently remarried another brother, he is a wonderful man and husband, i care for him deeply we and had been friends for 15 years.

i also have a son from my first marriage who is 4, he is the love of my life, recently my son had an opertion that could require a blook transfusion and to be honest i could never deny him that.

jambon1

In all aspects of life you find people that are loving or just horrible. The truth teaches that in the org it is a haven of peace, an oasis. In reality its just like the rest of the world. Mind you, I have experienced some lovely people with much more integrity than the average JW in the world.

I learned after about 4 years in the truth that it wasnt what it was cracked up to be. My gut instinct when I had my children told me that I would save them no matter what. The blood issue is deeply flawed and I knew in my heart that I would give them blood (if it came to it) and that I would never shun them like you are taught to do if they are dfd. I`d rather tear my heart out!

Go with your conscience. If you dont leave you will always have these doubts.

No matter what you do, you are always welcome here.

J

61

Why shouldn't I be a JW?

by AirDuster in

hi, i am brand new to these forums.

i have been reading some stuff for a while from here and other websites.

i feels totally crazy being a member now.

jambon1

I just knew in my heart and soul that I didn't believe that God would wipe out the majority of the earth's population just so that I and a few others could live in paradise. I hated the Armageddon pictures. I hated the gleeful way 'The friends' would watch the news and hope for the end. I thought, I'm not hoping for my non-JW family to die, I don't want the 'worldly' kids next door to die.

Sorry for being lazy & not typing much of my own but the points raised by others feelings really sound like how I felt.

Best,

J

28

Oh my god!!!!!!! My sister's getting married..............!!!!!!!!!!

by kittyeatzjdubs in

jw
friends

.........to her wordly boyfriend who's in the army!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**screams** oh my god!

i can hardly type right now i'm so happy!

jambon1

And after seeing her so sad and broken for so many years...she was just a shell of a person...you could see the sadness in her eyes. There were so many times that I wanted so badly to just grab her and shake her and scream, ''RUN HL!!!! RUN FAR AWAY!!! RUN!!!''

And this is what makes me happy too. Another miserable person entraped by the org is set free from her sadness.

Congratulations.

J

13

So for you...

by KW13 in

jw
friends

so for you what made you leave?.

what helped you stay out?.

did you have support from friends or anyone (online included .

jambon1

Unique1 - the probably also saw sept 11th as a good thing, step nearer to the end

I heard the expression said many times that the disaster was 'sad, but exciting' - WTF?

Wacked out freaks.