This is a very important topic for me. I am 62 years old and have gone through therapy about 12 years ago. No longer do I have issues with major depression or all consuming anxiety. But I still have residual anger! Maybe our deep seated issues don't come to the fore all at once? Perhaps we can only take so much psychologically and so our minds only let us work on what we are able to at any given moment. At any rate Sour Grapes, I feel your pain and am sorry for all your wasted years as a Witness. I am working on my anger daily by practicing principles of mindfulness that I learned in therapy.
Each morning I read a segment of this book to refresh myself on how to apply mindfulness in dealing with my anger. My hope is that I no longer injure myself or those close to me through inappropriate expression of anger. Best wishes to you. As Jon Kabat Zinn is fond of saying: 'Remember, in any given moment, there is more right with you than wrong with you.'