Posts by mimimimi

40

J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew

by mimimimi in

jw
friends

as i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.

my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.

the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.

mimimimi

It turns out the dad and his brother were told the service was at 11:00, but they were not told about the visitation at 10:00. Well now they know because I told them. I think they were being deliberately excluded from the visitation. I think that is unbelievably rude. I am sure there will be plenty of people there besides witnesses, and Snakes in the Tower and Donutstogo and his wife will be there. Well, Snakes works Saturday, but he said he was going to try to work things around to come. He and Donuts have been a tremendous comfort to me this week.

I think everyone is going to keep in mind that this is an occasion to respect and honor Ryan and there should not be any problems. I guess Carol did not tell the dad and brother about the visitation because she knew the witnesses would not want to associate with them. Anyway, the dad and brother are having another wake/memorial, but were waiting to schedule it once they knew when Carol's would be so it would not interfere. So I will be going to the second one, too. Which reminds me, I need to let Snakes know about the second one. He originally said he would prefer to go to that one, especially if the first one was at the KH.

40

J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew

by mimimimi in

jw
friends

as i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.

my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.

the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.

mimimimi

Their spiritual paradise always was a farce. Spiritual hell, more like.

10

The Things I Hold Against You.......................

by Judge Dread in

jw
friends

i hold nothing against anyone on this forum.. no hate.. no grudges.. no nothing.. i may not agree with some, but i do respect each and every one of you.. jdw .

.

mimimimi

Yes, Syl. So did I.

40

J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew

by mimimimi in

jw
friends

as i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.

my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.

the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.

mimimimi

Arrangements have finally been made. My brother is going to use the Watchtower outline and deliver the "talk". He is not an elder. Carol decided she did not want to ask an elder. She was probably afraid they would turn her down once they went through their "research" and soul searching. It will be a visitation and service an hour later on Saturday at a local funeral home - Marks Mortuary in Wood River. I don't know if my ex-brother in law knows yet. I know he and one of my other nephews and a bunch of friends will still have their own thing. I told him that if the times do not conflict, I would go to both.

I never expected that our family would have to go through this. My mother is elderly, but I think she has already made plans for her funeral and told those who need to know for when she passes. She will, of course, have a KH service, which I expected. If this were an accident and not suicide, there would have been no problem. I am not surprised by what has happened here, but I feel just sickened by it. I truly wish this would wake up my family, but unfortunately I know that will not happen.

40

J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew

by mimimimi in

jw
friends

as i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.

my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.

the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.

mimimimi

Thank you all. Ryan truly was a victim. OTWO, I truly hope we can convince Carol that a eulogy is in order, maybe more than one person speaking. My brother is not in good health and has difficulty standing for long and I am not sure he will feel capable of doing this. It is all still very much up in the air. Still no obituary in the paper either. I thought they would at least put in a short one stating arrangements are pending, but I guess Carol is having them wait. Many friends already know due to facebook and I bet they are wondering what is taking so long.

Blues Brother - I talked last night to Donutstogo. He used to be in my sister's congregation, but he and his wife are no longer witnesses. They are good Christians. He said that another congregation in this circuit had done 2 funerals at the KH for suicide victims. That cong disbanded and their elders are now at my sister's cong, so he thought they would probably be willing to do this. But her cong had a big shakeup last year, elders removed, etc., and their PO now is ex-military guy, very strict and by the book, so I am sure he weighed in heavily on their decision.

I wish this would make my family wake up to the truth about this organization, but I think they are just going to be stronger in their faith than ever with this. Even they are being so failed in their time of need.

40

J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew

by mimimimi in

jw
friends

as i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.

my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.

the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.

mimimimi

Well, one of the elders came to talk with my sister last night and told her that if they allowed the KH for my nephew's funeral, then they would be expected to allow the KH for other suicide funerals. My other sister, who is not a JW, told him that she thought they were giving a very bad witness. Also he told my sister that whoever she asked to do the funeral would have to do research in order to decide if their conscience would let them do the funeral. So at this point, my sister (Carol) is going to ask our brother (Melvin) if he will do the service. One of the sisters in her congregation, who is a very loving, non-judgmental sister, is going to get a community hall to have a meal and Carol is going to talk to Melvin about whether they should do a funeral "talk" at the place where they have the meal or at the funeral home. I said to her that there may be people who will want to go to the funeral home who would not go to the meal and she said that's true. He passed away Monday and here we are on Wednesday with no decisions made, just still questions.

40

J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew

by mimimimi in

jw
friends

as i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.

my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.

the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.

mimimimi

Yes, Mouthy, I have known of that before. THen I know of at least one where the woman was on nerve medication and over-dosed and they had her funeral at the hall because they said she was not in her right mind and not responsible. Who is in their right mind when they commit suicide?

40

J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew

by mimimimi in

jw
friends

as i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.

my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.

the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.

mimimimi

Brotherdan, Thanks so much for your words of wisdom. My sister has heard back from the elders and they have told her to read an article in a 2002 Watchtower about these situations. I think they want her to make the decision that it should not be held at the KH. So she is not at home where she has all her bound volumes and Watchtower CD's, so she is online trying to find it - I guess on the Watchtower website.

I am grateful for the comment that "they need to take a step back and make sure that this funeral honors your nephew". That is so true and I am going to look for an opportunity to bring that to the fore for both my sister and her ex-husband. It is not a time to allow bitterness (on the part of ex-husband) to mar this situation.

Those of you who are praying people, please keep my family in your prayers, especially my deceased nephew.

Mimi- Ginny

40

J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew

by mimimimi in

jw
friends

as i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.

my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.

the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.

mimimimi

As I said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening. My sister is a die-hard JW and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her. The elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the KH. If they do, they told her that whatever elder she asks to do the service will have to examine his conscience to determine if he can do so. My ex-brother in law is disfellowshipped, has been for the last 16 or so years and they have been divorced that long and he is livid. He said he is still a minister and could do the service himself. My sister says their son was not his dad's religion, so that would not be appropriate. Honestly, he is Wicken now and I think many would have issues with that. But I think

The elder suggested to her as well that she rent a place where they could have a "talk" and then a meal. If that were to happen, then I guess disfellowshipped dad and disfellowshipped cousin would not be welcome, as well as brother who was never baptized. SHe is trying to count costs on this; does not have much. My daughter-in-law and I are offereing to pay the extra for the funeral home for a memorial service, but I have not been able to talk to my sister yet. Then we could either rent a place for a meal or have it at our youngest sister's house, which is quite large, but we know it would still be packed. I would love to see whatever happens done to where the JW's have no control or say whatsoever.

I just talked to my sister (mom of nephew) and she said her middle son (one never baptized) said if there was a JW memorial for my nephew, he would not come. He and his father are planning a memorial service of their own. I wish we could bring all of this together somehow.

35

One of my nephews passed away this evening

by mimimimi in

he was 23 years old.

he was depressed and took his own life.

no one had any idea he was contemplating something like this.

mimimimi

Thank you all. He must have been in great pain. We found out after the fact that he had a new identity on facebook that he was using for some game FAQ and on there he had been saying for a month that he was going to kill himself. The people he was friends with on there knew and did not find it important enough to try to contact his family. We are all heartbroken, but hopefully he has found the peace and joy.