Mamalove, they did. It will be at the funeral home and my brother will give the "talk". Father and son will be there, but then are having another memorial along with wake to honor Ryan in their own way, which I will attend as well. So sad that things had to turn out the way they did.
mimimimi
JoinedPosts by mimimimi
-
40
J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew
by mimimimi inas i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.
my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.
the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.
-
-
-
40
J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew
by mimimimi inas i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.
my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.
the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.
-
-
mimimimi
Well, this is what I get for assuming. The dad just told me that Carol did not deliberately exclude them from the visitation. She just got distracted by her son before she finished telling the whole thing. I am sure it is very hard for her to keep all her thoughts straight right now. This is such a nightmare.
-
40
J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew
by mimimimi inas i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.
my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.
the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.
-
-
mimimimi
It turns out the dad and his brother were told the service was at 11:00, but they were not told about the visitation at 10:00. Well now they know because I told them. I think they were being deliberately excluded from the visitation. I think that is unbelievably rude. I am sure there will be plenty of people there besides witnesses, and Snakes in the Tower and Donutstogo and his wife will be there. Well, Snakes works Saturday, but he said he was going to try to work things around to come. He and Donuts have been a tremendous comfort to me this week.
I think everyone is going to keep in mind that this is an occasion to respect and honor Ryan and there should not be any problems. I guess Carol did not tell the dad and brother about the visitation because she knew the witnesses would not want to associate with them. Anyway, the dad and brother are having another wake/memorial, but were waiting to schedule it once they knew when Carol's would be so it would not interfere. So I will be going to the second one, too. Which reminds me, I need to let Snakes know about the second one. He originally said he would prefer to go to that one, especially if the first one was at the KH.
-
40
J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew
by mimimimi inas i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.
my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.
the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.
-
-
mimimimi
Their spiritual paradise always was a farce. Spiritual hell, more like.
-
10
The Things I Hold Against You.......................
by Judge Dread ini hold nothing against anyone on this forum.. no hate.. no grudges.. no nothing.. i may not agree with some, but i do respect each and every one of you.. jdw .
.
-
-
mimimimi
Yes, Syl. So did I.
-
40
J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew
by mimimimi inas i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.
my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.
the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.
-
-
mimimimi
Arrangements have finally been made. My brother is going to use the Watchtower outline and deliver the "talk". He is not an elder. Carol decided she did not want to ask an elder. She was probably afraid they would turn her down once they went through their "research" and soul searching. It will be a visitation and service an hour later on Saturday at a local funeral home - Marks Mortuary in Wood River. I don't know if my ex-brother in law knows yet. I know he and one of my other nephews and a bunch of friends will still have their own thing. I told him that if the times do not conflict, I would go to both.
I never expected that our family would have to go through this. My mother is elderly, but I think she has already made plans for her funeral and told those who need to know for when she passes. She will, of course, have a KH service, which I expected. If this were an accident and not suicide, there would have been no problem. I am not surprised by what has happened here, but I feel just sickened by it. I truly wish this would wake up my family, but unfortunately I know that will not happen.
-
40
J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew
by mimimimi inas i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.
my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.
the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.
-
-
mimimimi
Thank you all. Ryan truly was a victim. OTWO, I truly hope we can convince Carol that a eulogy is in order, maybe more than one person speaking. My brother is not in good health and has difficulty standing for long and I am not sure he will feel capable of doing this. It is all still very much up in the air. Still no obituary in the paper either. I thought they would at least put in a short one stating arrangements are pending, but I guess Carol is having them wait. Many friends already know due to facebook and I bet they are wondering what is taking so long.
Blues Brother - I talked last night to Donutstogo. He used to be in my sister's congregation, but he and his wife are no longer witnesses. They are good Christians. He said that another congregation in this circuit had done 2 funerals at the KH for suicide victims. That cong disbanded and their elders are now at my sister's cong, so he thought they would probably be willing to do this. But her cong had a big shakeup last year, elders removed, etc., and their PO now is ex-military guy, very strict and by the book, so I am sure he weighed in heavily on their decision.
I wish this would make my family wake up to the truth about this organization, but I think they are just going to be stronger in their faith than ever with this. Even they are being so failed in their time of need.
-
40
J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew
by mimimimi inas i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.
my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.
the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.
-
-
mimimimi
Well, one of the elders came to talk with my sister last night and told her that if they allowed the KH for my nephew's funeral, then they would be expected to allow the KH for other suicide funerals. My other sister, who is not a JW, told him that she thought they were giving a very bad witness. Also he told my sister that whoever she asked to do the funeral would have to do research in order to decide if their conscience would let them do the funeral. So at this point, my sister (Carol) is going to ask our brother (Melvin) if he will do the service. One of the sisters in her congregation, who is a very loving, non-judgmental sister, is going to get a community hall to have a meal and Carol is going to talk to Melvin about whether they should do a funeral "talk" at the place where they have the meal or at the funeral home. I said to her that there may be people who will want to go to the funeral home who would not go to the meal and she said that's true. He passed away Monday and here we are on Wednesday with no decisions made, just still questions.
-
40
J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew
by mimimimi inas i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.
my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.
the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.
-
-
mimimimi
Yes, Mouthy, I have known of that before. THen I know of at least one where the woman was on nerve medication and over-dosed and they had her funeral at the hall because they said she was not in her right mind and not responsible. Who is in their right mind when they commit suicide?
-
40
J-dub elders throwing a wrench in funeral services for my nephew
by mimimimi inas i said in my earlier post, my nephew took his own life yesterday evening.
my sister is a die-hard jw and this religion is her comfort more than ever right now, so she accepts everything they throw at her.
the elders will meet this evening and decide whether they will allow a memorial service at the kh.
-
-
mimimimi
Brotherdan, Thanks so much for your words of wisdom. My sister has heard back from the elders and they have told her to read an article in a 2002 Watchtower about these situations. I think they want her to make the decision that it should not be held at the KH. So she is not at home where she has all her bound volumes and Watchtower CD's, so she is online trying to find it - I guess on the Watchtower website.
I am grateful for the comment that "they need to take a step back and make sure that this funeral honors your nephew". That is so true and I am going to look for an opportunity to bring that to the fore for both my sister and her ex-husband. It is not a time to allow bitterness (on the part of ex-husband) to mar this situation.
Those of you who are praying people, please keep my family in your prayers, especially my deceased nephew.
Mimi- Ginny