Tornintwo

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Posts by Tornintwo

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  113

  I just found out that my youngest brother committed suicide

  by SnakesInTheTower in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my middle brother called me a couple of hours ago.

  our youngest brother, josh, who was 38, was found by his friends in his apartment.

  he hung himself.

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  Tornintwo

  I'm so so sorry, theres no right way to deal with such news, look after yourself and get as much support as possible. it happened in my husband's family and I know it is devastating to all. thinking of you and your family.
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  11

  Please how can I create a website?

  by COLLINS in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  please i want someone to teach me how i create websites.thanks!.

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  Tornintwo

  Try wix
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  16

  Searching for those who "know" TTAT

  by EyesOpenHeartBroken in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  does anybody have any tips for conversation starters to covertly feel out someone in the cong that you suspect is a "knower" about ttat?.

  any success or experiences to share?.

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  Tornintwo

  "I always thought the truth would set you free, but to be honest, I find the truth is getting me down at the moment, making me feel restricted, guilty and never good enough - do you ever feel like that?"

  If they are still in they will try to 'help' you with your doubts/depression but if out they might just open up...
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  51

  My first post

  by thewalker in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi, i just joined the board and wanted to present myself.. i'm active, in fact very active in congregation activities serving "where the need is great" in a foreign language congregation somewhere in western europe.

  as a young brother, i'm seen as an example as i'm doing all a good witness should do.. i had doubts years ago but i decided just to ignore them and move to another congregation to preach more.

  that worked for some years but i'm now at the exact same point.

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  Tornintwo

  Hi thewalker and welcome - you wrote very clearly and as you can see from the excellent replies you already have, most of us have been where you were...

  It was the lack of love in the congregation which started my doubts a few months ago, I was looking up at a prominent elder speaking about love at the assembly, knowing that he is one of the nastiest, most abusive people I know and helped to push 3 young ones out of the congregation. Unfortunately it wasn't just one incident, one brother, but a pattern and I found myself thinking - "is Jehovah really blessing this organisation?"

  Finally I allowed myself to research this religion independently after 25 years as a witness - what I first found was the problem with mishandling of child abuse in the witnesses. You and I have both seen people hurt and mistreated in the congregation, it hurts but usually it's not lifechanging, but what about when elders have mishandled child abuse reports from a youngster? Leaving a young victim unheard, unprotected, continuing to be molested, then mistreated afterwards... Google it - there are lots of stories like this one:

  http://www.sandiegouniontribune.com/news/2014/oct/31/jehovahs-witness-sex-abuse-judgment-lopez/

  In Australia they have just had a Royal Commission Enquiry into the witnesses handling of Child abuse. It court-ordered files from the bethel which found files on 1006 known Jehovahs Witness child abusers in Australia and NOT ONE SINGLE CASE had been reported to the authorities. They held public hearings which were damning and identified 'grave concerns' with the witness policies.

  Now the UK Charities commission is investigating the same thing in Britain...

  Again, how can Jehovah allow this kind of mishandling and cover ups if this is his organisation?

  Then there is shunning within families, where youths like you who have had doubts or done something 'wrong', have been disfellowshipped, cut off from all contact from their families when they are at a time in life where they need love and support - some have become depressed and even committed suicide...

  Again where is the love?

  After finding out about those two major things, I found this forum, and I was recommended jwfacts.com and Crisis of Conscience (a book by a former Governing Body member Raymond Franz). These two things confirmed the fact that the witnesses cannot be the 'only true religion'. I still love God and Christ but I now feel free of this oppressive organisation which specialises in making people feel guilty and never good enough. I look at my neighbours and fellow man in a completely different way now - not like they are under the devil's spell so I can't be friends with them.

  Listen to your doubts, you have friends here who will sympathise, It is a painful process, waking up to 'the truth about the truth' but it is very freeing also! (the truth shall set you free.....)
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  19

  Can a baptism be annulled?

  by angel.face in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i joined this site about 4 years ago and life was very different to say the least.

  i was a jw and started the process of 'waking up' after experiencing life threatening blood loss due to complications of a pregnancy.

  i was married with two kids (husband was an ms) and was a stay-at-home mom.

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  Tornintwo

  I forgot to say AngelFace, well done for having the strength and courage to leave an abusive marriage and an abusive religion! I wish you ever success and happiness with your children. Would love to hear more of your story.
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  19

  Can a baptism be annulled?

  by angel.face in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i joined this site about 4 years ago and life was very different to say the least.

  i was a jw and started the process of 'waking up' after experiencing life threatening blood loss due to complications of a pregnancy.

  i was married with two kids (husband was an ms) and was a stay-at-home mom.

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  Tornintwo

  I asked this question recently thinking about my daughter, who got baptised at 14 but very quickly realised she had made an emotional decision and wasn't aware of all of the facts re. JW beliefs. So she hasn't validated her decision by continuing to act as a witness into adulthood. My question was motivated from a desire to see her avoid getting disfellowshipped and the pain and punishment of shunning which come with that.

  When I asked the question on here someone pointed out to me that going through the process of requesting an anulment whether granted or not (unlikely) would inevitably lead to us being red flagged by the cong. and shunned anyway!
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  37

  Why does Antoine Leiris' powerful tribute to his wife, killed by ISIS in the Paris attacks, bother me so much?

  by nicolaou in

  1. social
  2. current

  here is the translation of monsieur leiris' words;.

  friday night, you took an exceptional life - the love of my life, the mother of my son - but you will not have my hatred.

  i don't know who you are and i don't want to know, you are dead souls.

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  Tornintwo

  These people should be rounded up and treated like the individual criminals that they are, by whatever means necessary, I'm not against fair trial but also fair punishment is warranted.

  They should never be given a platform for their religious hatred speech which makes it appear that they are a group with a 'cause'. These are individuals committing barbarous acts and should be treated as such. To consider them an 'army' is to strengthen them, to consider them a Jihadist group - giving credence to their 'holy war' is to strengthen them.

  What they are is scum, criminals, psychopaths who have attached themselves to a so-called 'cause' to give vent to their own murderous and barbaric desires. I say ban their messages, their rhetoric from being published on the web, the news or anywhere - everytime a news channel shows a video from these people they promote the false premise that they have some kind of cause with validity. It should be 'a man/group of men has been arrested/killed for committing mass murder/rape/planting a bomb' etc, no mention of religion, group affiliation etc. take the steam out of their 'jihad'.
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  35

  Saddest thing about being DFd

  by kairos in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i always enjoyed being kind.

  when someone genuinely needed a hand or what not, it felt good to help family or friends.. i don't really miss them anymore.

  i faded over two years ago, so they long ago shunned me.i think about them less and less and have even forgotten some names.i did enjoy some of the friendships and the association.

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  Tornintwo

  I miss friends in the congregation because like many I have precious few friends outside, having discouraged such 'wordly associations' until now.

  I'm having coffee with a JW tomorrow. The difficulty is that as soon as you see them, they start asking all the awkward questions about why you aren't attending anymore etc etc, and I personally feel the pressure and despite myself, the guilt, so I don't enjoy it. It's all or nothing with them, either you're with them wholeheartedly or you're out.
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  4

  UK Charity Investigation

  by berrygerry in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  i do not know the background of the tiff (is there one?

  ) between cedars and this board, but i do not think that his efforts with the uk charity office should be unassisted.. he is asking for brit ex-dubs who have been impacted by shunning.. https://www.reddit.com/r/exjw/comments/3t7pac/help_needed_shunning_experiences_from_uk_exjws/.

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  Tornintwo

  you should change the thread title to say - 'UK Charity Investigation - Need Shunning Experiences'

  I agree, even if some don't agree with all Cedar's methods or attitude, if he has the commissions' ear for this document it makes sense to put as many experiences together as possible to get their attention.
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  28

  Question for believers, heaven or earth?

  by Tornintwo in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  just trying to figure out what i believe in the wake of leaving the borg.

  jesus message appeals, of course.

  i just wanted to ask believers, christians, on this forum if you think the hope is heaven or earth.

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  Tornintwo

  I agree it's a surprise to say the least to find that Protestants/mainstream Christianity also allow for belief in resurrection to the earth 'in the end', as per the searcher's video post on page. 1, interesting. I was lead to believe that only the witnesses had that belief and that we had to put up with all of the other crap in order to entertain that hope. Hmm eye opener.

  I think it's the dogmatism and superiority that I hate the most, "only we have it right, you can't disagree because were appointed by God, everyone else has it wrong, they're all going to die if they don't join us". What a massive superiority complex and ego trip. It seems like most other Christian religions allow for quite a bit of personal freedom of thought based around the basic Christian message.