How about, "Hi ya, hon, relax, I'm not here to sell you WT's or browbeat you, hoping to get you to CONVERT (evil bad no-no word). Nah, I'm just here to tell you what you always have suspected: JW's are full of caca. Don't listen to them. They come with tales of peace and paradise. What they don't tell you is that they want to control your thoughts, words and deeds. They want to take away your joy and zest for life. They want to ruin your kids' childhoods. Their love and friendship is very conditional. They shun you to the extreme if you decide you disagree with them. But, hey, if you do decide to join and then later you want to leave, there are a bunch of us who've left literally or in spirit. We are very hip, happenin', with it and cool. We've got websites and we've got your back." I'd shake their hands, give 'em a wink and a card with important internet links to explore at their leisure.
How's that grab you, Daddio
Oh Baby!
Yeah, that sounds good.