Memphis Belle, I used to live in Memphis & was treated very similiarly. I was married to the city overseer's son & when he became abusive toward me (mentally & physically) I spoke with the elders... Their answer? Well at first, because he didn't show up on time for the "elders meeting", they told me how they were gonna read such & such scriptures & threaten "public reproof" & how I needed to be patient & lett them handle it. Well when he did finally show up(over 30 mins late), they turned around & read me scriptures on how to be a good wife. I was the VICTIM of abuse. Once all of this happened, all my "friends" now had to chose me, or him & his family.... as far as whose side they were on... guess who lost? Yep, me. I decided then & there that if they were going to protect "wife beaters" then I didn't want to be a part of that organization. I really haven't been back since, and that was in 1998. Alas my own parents turned on me in 2002 when I wouldn't teach my child about the JW's.... Don't feel alone. I wonder if we know any of the same people. If you have been in that long, you probably know most if not all of my family as well as my ex husbands family. I'd love to chat with you.
Jessica