Sorry, I forgot my original thought! During the judicial hearings leading to my disfellowshipping for sexual (gay) misconduct, I was asked by one elder, "Why don't you find a nice sister to marry? You can find things in common. This is OK, and do you know why? It's because sex isn't everything, B-." This advice bothered me deeply because it suggested that the sexual needs of my contemplated "wife" were completely neglible. The comments were not challenged by anyone present during the meeting.
benjammin
JoinedPosts by benjammin
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Non-practising homosexual JW's
by Quillsky inas i understand it, being gay is not a sin in the organization, only homosexual acts are sins.
i've never read anywhere that gay jw people are encouraged to "fix" their gayness and marry.. i've certainly known a fair number of confirmed bachelor types who live exemplary lives in the witness sense - one life-long bethelite i knew springs to mind - but are clearly (to me anyway) gay.
they've all been in the closet though.. i wonder if any jw has ever been out of the closet, but not disfellowshipped since they don't have sex?
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Non-practising homosexual JW's
by Quillsky inas i understand it, being gay is not a sin in the organization, only homosexual acts are sins.
i've never read anywhere that gay jw people are encouraged to "fix" their gayness and marry.. i've certainly known a fair number of confirmed bachelor types who live exemplary lives in the witness sense - one life-long bethelite i knew springs to mind - but are clearly (to me anyway) gay.
they've all been in the closet though.. i wonder if any jw has ever been out of the closet, but not disfellowshipped since they don't have sex?
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benjammin
The point is, although the organization may teach that celibate homosexuals should be treated as spiritual brothers and sisters does not mean that they are treated this way. In my own experience, I have heard the word "faggot" out of the mouth of an elder's wife (who is also my mother) and the comment, "I would kill my kid if I found out he was gay," from a dear personal [former] JW friend. The x-factor of "celibacy" seemed irrelevant to their thoughts on homosexuality in general.
In the collective JW mind, the word "homosexual" is filed into the same mental compartment as pedophiles, murderers, sodomiites, and satanists. Did I forget anyone? To say that Jehovah's Witnesses are capable (as a group) of making the differentiation between "celibate" and "sexually active" homosexuals and then acting kindly towards the celibate ones is to (sorry) give them too much credit! When I was disfellowshipped for sexual misconduct a few years back and asked why I didn't come forward to talk to someone about my homosexual feelings (at a time when I WAS celibate), I just about sh*t myself. I wondered, "Do these people actually believe they foster an environment in the congregation where homosexuals should feel at ease with themselves?" What profound, shameful disconnection on the part of the org.
There are invidual people within the org who can see things differently on their own, and I sincerely appreciate their posts here. I wish there were more like you, as do the many who are quietly ailing.
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Stayed up all night, see it is a cult now.
by gutted ini really needed to find a place to write this as i don't believe i can talk with anyone else about my account, perhaps it is similar to a lot of yours.. last night for whatever reason i said i would go online and look up information on jws.
i have been raised as a jw all my life and baptized the last few years.
i looked at www.freeminds.org and www.sixscreensofthewatchtower.com and couldn't believe how easily the whole of my lifes teachings were refuted.. i can't stop my brain from running, bs just in regards to theology alone (1914, paradise earth, celebrations etc.
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benjammin
Pace yourself through this experience, friend. At this point you have some control over how it will play out. It is sincerely frigthening to acknowledge the doubts you are encountering, and my heart goes out to you. Sounds like many of us have been at this same spot (me too). If you're like me, then it must seem like there is nothing out there as far as support and understanding go, and that you stand to lose everything that is important to you.
I was born and raised a JW and I had a deep love for it (my whole family still are). I am not anymore, though. I am familiar with your anguish and one time would have called myself too weak to face these things. For me, it was complete turmoil and it seemed unfair at every step of the way. It felt like a true transition from "Life A" into "Life B". But the truth is- you don't know yet how strong you can be, depending on what you decide to do. And you have time on your side. Take your time and remember to make the choices your own. You can do this.
Some things really helped me. I was able to cultivate some quality friendships with people who are not JW's, sticking with people who understood my boundaries and respected what I was going through. I continued my internet research about JW's and read a great book- "Blood on The Altar: Confessions of a Jehovah's Witness Minister" by David Reed. It's very scholarly and fair, and is loaded with captivating history of the organization as told through the personal experiences of a former elder- one who seems like a nice enough guy. I found support for my point of view, but (honestly) I could only find it outside of the organization. As a 22 year-old, lifelong Witness, I felt I already knew the reaction my concerns would receive if I even mentioned them.
This isn't easy. Remember others have been exaclty where you are at now. Find support for your point of view. And remember, friend, that some of the doubts you are encountering are products of your own good conscience, sensibility, and sensitivity.
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TV progams that must be not be viewed at all costs
by TooBad TooSad inthe elder giving the public talk a couple of weeks ago told the congregation that there are more and more.
movies and tv programs, like charmed, or books and movies like harry potter that must be avoided at all costs.
because they are a direct link to demonism and spiritism.
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benjammin
It's funny that JW's set themselves apart from other Christian sects, but they're united with the rest of Christendom in their condemnation of Harry Potter. Children's fiction is a gateway to spiritism, huh? And the Harry Potter series is on par with stuff like "The Exorcist"? Thank goodness the Watchtower can "dumb down" such concepts for its adherents, making them exempt from philosophical accountability. Jesus.
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what have jws got against beards ?
by looloo inand it really used to annoy me that jesus and john the baptist both had such neat and well trimmed beards in the watchtower literature , how unlikley would that be in reality ?
also they never wore a suit so why do "true christians "have to wear one , is all about appearences by any chance and giving a false impression ?
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benjammin
How ironic that the "no-beard" policy springs not from scriptural evidence, but from the antiquated grooming sensibilities of the old farts in the Governing Body. They are obviously influenced by what "the world" deems unsuitable for a clean-cut man, albeit by the retarded standards of the 1950's. These people shouldn't be giving lessons in living.
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benjammin
I recommend the book "Blood On the Altar" by David L. Reed, a former JW elder. It is an insightful and fair assessment of the Watchtower's flubs, including an expose of the organizational history and CT Russell's curious personal affairs. Did you know he originally calculated the "time of the end" using measurements from the pyramids at Giza? And the "time of the end" date has changed no less than 7 times in the Watchtower's history? No wonder they don't teach from their older publications.