I have four sisters and two brothers, and I think the way we have suffered in the JWs is that we were never accepted or i suspect liked. A classic example is that, I an unmarried mum, got baptised when my baby was 11months old, and when she was 4, I was aux pioneering, there are three cong that share the same hall, and a reg pioneer couple from my cong decided to hold a fun picnic day for all the witness children...... Me and my daughter was the only ones not to recieve an invite, We never recieved invites to anything, so thsat coupled with some elders wives trying to marry me off to a 64 year elder (me being 23/24 at the time) I knew I had to get away, infact I moved 300 miles away. I havent found much happiness in the world BUT at least I can CHOSE who Im friendly with and I dont feel forced to be nicey nicey.
chikikie
JoinedPosts by chikikie
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383
Thinking of becoming a Witness again and my reasons for doing so :(
by reniaa ini've been a faded jw for 10 years i left because of my failed first marriage, i'm no hypocrite and realised i had left completely so i embraced the world and dived in, only christmas and birthdays i could not get into, they were too foreign to me having never celebrated them, like if i suddenly tried to do ramadan or something like that.. 1/ all the criticisms of the people in the truth you say on here, i've found in the world, warts and all only in the world nothing holds them back from being utterly horrible to you.. 2/ i got stabbed by a worldly boyfriend, i got married 2 times of my own choosing to men outside the truth, the first smoked and was an alcoholic, the second gambled every penny we had and defrauded me out of money after we separated, 2 divorces later i am currently pregnant and a single mum since current boyfriend decided kids was to much of a responsibility and he needed his freedom and i was 'too selfish to expect him to give up his life'.. 3/ parents-in-law!
i have been shunned by them as equal to anything you accuse witness families of and for the silliest of reasons, i had a disabled son and his grandparents said they wanted nothing to do with him because they didn't want to become attached in case he died.. 4/ i miss the honest friendships of the truth, i had friends of all ages from 14 to 80 years old and they genuinely cared for me, many trying to keep me in the faith a long time after i left but i was determined to fade so moved away completely, but i find friendships in the world so shallow in comparison and very hard to sustain :( i've never been a drinker and sometimes thats what friendship means you being a companion for them to goto pub with.. 5/ my recent boyfriend was in a christian religion, i thought why not find out about it, harvest churches if you ever heard of them, unfortunately it still hasn't stop him leaving me pregnant and alone and when i said to him how does he clear that with god, he replies "as long as i repent it doesn't matter" it's like he has a "get out of jail free card" for any wrong-doing in the bible, this is so alien to me and my witness trained conscience.. 6/ i recently out of frustration tried looking into atheism and joined their forums, it wasn't fun, they are as bombastic and arrogant as their religious counterparts can be from any religion, they make a religion out of not believing in god, it's very weird they talk of saving people from believing in god and offer nothing to replace it.
they said to me "be happy you are in reality now and enjoy it" and i thought "well if this is reality i've had enough of it".
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383
Thinking of becoming a Witness again and my reasons for doing so :(
by reniaa ini've been a faded jw for 10 years i left because of my failed first marriage, i'm no hypocrite and realised i had left completely so i embraced the world and dived in, only christmas and birthdays i could not get into, they were too foreign to me having never celebrated them, like if i suddenly tried to do ramadan or something like that.. 1/ all the criticisms of the people in the truth you say on here, i've found in the world, warts and all only in the world nothing holds them back from being utterly horrible to you.. 2/ i got stabbed by a worldly boyfriend, i got married 2 times of my own choosing to men outside the truth, the first smoked and was an alcoholic, the second gambled every penny we had and defrauded me out of money after we separated, 2 divorces later i am currently pregnant and a single mum since current boyfriend decided kids was to much of a responsibility and he needed his freedom and i was 'too selfish to expect him to give up his life'.. 3/ parents-in-law!
i have been shunned by them as equal to anything you accuse witness families of and for the silliest of reasons, i had a disabled son and his grandparents said they wanted nothing to do with him because they didn't want to become attached in case he died.. 4/ i miss the honest friendships of the truth, i had friends of all ages from 14 to 80 years old and they genuinely cared for me, many trying to keep me in the faith a long time after i left but i was determined to fade so moved away completely, but i find friendships in the world so shallow in comparison and very hard to sustain :( i've never been a drinker and sometimes thats what friendship means you being a companion for them to goto pub with.. 5/ my recent boyfriend was in a christian religion, i thought why not find out about it, harvest churches if you ever heard of them, unfortunately it still hasn't stop him leaving me pregnant and alone and when i said to him how does he clear that with god, he replies "as long as i repent it doesn't matter" it's like he has a "get out of jail free card" for any wrong-doing in the bible, this is so alien to me and my witness trained conscience.. 6/ i recently out of frustration tried looking into atheism and joined their forums, it wasn't fun, they are as bombastic and arrogant as their religious counterparts can be from any religion, they make a religion out of not believing in god, it's very weird they talk of saving people from believing in god and offer nothing to replace it.
they said to me "be happy you are in reality now and enjoy it" and i thought "well if this is reality i've had enough of it".
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chikikie
what reniaa says is the exact truth, i know cos im her biological sister. i dont think she should go back tho.
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New Online Game - tetris/sudoko combo?
by Princess Daisy Boo indoes anyone know what this game is called?
i saw it on bbc world and i cannot for the life of me recall what it is called - you play it online.
numbers come down and you have to put the right combinations of numbers together to make a sum.. thanks friends!.
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chikikie
is it this? Koozac
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62
Need some advice
by KICKED OUT ini have not been on here in a long time but i have always valued the advice of everyone, so here goes.....i am dfd and my wife has never been a part of the org.
we are getting ready to have our first child in may.
my mother who is now living in patterson(at one of the motherships) speaks to me every 1 to 2 years.
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chikikie
I think hun that you need to address guidelines. Make it absolutely clear that you left the JWs for good reasons, and that you never intend to return to the organisation, mentioning the memorial is in a vain hope that you and your pregnant wife will go to the memorial and suddenly get your faith back, study etc, obv from what you have written this is not going to happen. You need to write an email and say that you know all there is to know about the JWs and have rejected that as a faith, and that on your part you feel there are no barriers, to a renewed family closeness, but that any preaching of the JWs brings back many unhappy memories and you have put that all behind you.
Dont let them cause any friction between you and your wife, cos from here it sounds as if you have found your own little piece of paradise. Good Luck to you.
Dont be a pushover, ok
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8
thinking of sponsoring a child....
by still_in74 inso i was watching "world view" or something like that last night and i was really moved by the what the presenter was saying.
he was a christian, and actively helping children all over the world.
he said some things that really caught my attention because they were things i have been thinking a lot about lately.. being so lost spiritually lately i have often found myself wondering why i am even here.
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chikikie
I thought about at one time or another, but then I think about or the children that are in need in our own community, and then i think I might like the idea of fostering, may do that when i am in my 40s.
Read your earlier post 'still_in' and did you come clean to your wife about your desire to leave? Or are you still living a lie-ish. Im about to have my 32nd birthday. So yourin my peer group.
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36
Courting couples in the JW having sex together before marriage?
by chikikie ini left about 8 years ago, at the grand old age of 24, basically being an unmarried mum of 1 (baptised when my girl was 11months old) and the 'tipping point for me' when elder sisters tried to set me up for marriage to a 64year old elder, as that would be the only man willing to marry a girl such as myself.
i ran away, i moved 300miles away.
there should be a witness pretection programme ;).
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chikikie
Unfortuately it wasnt just one sister but a few who got together matchmaking, the trouble is, many married sisters feel threatened when there are beautiful unmarried sisters, and i had a few brothers interrested in me, but alas, gossip as you know, in the congregation and a bad reference can stop you from any marriage possibilties. So there solution was to marry me off to an elder. Honestly at the time I felt awful and confused but now when i look back with the eyes of a maturer woman that what they did was wrong and disgusting.
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36
Courting couples in the JW having sex together before marriage?
by chikikie ini left about 8 years ago, at the grand old age of 24, basically being an unmarried mum of 1 (baptised when my girl was 11months old) and the 'tipping point for me' when elder sisters tried to set me up for marriage to a 64year old elder, as that would be the only man willing to marry a girl such as myself.
i ran away, i moved 300miles away.
there should be a witness pretection programme ;).
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chikikie
I suppose I get so mad at the fact i got made an example of, because when i was 18, I ran away to london slept with an australian boyfriend once, came rushing back home because i felt so bad. Was honest to the elders, (at this tiem not baptised) and was not reinstated for a year and half, I thought that was bad considering an elder who got prison term for abusing his daughter was reinstated after 9 months, anyway I get baptised when my daughter is 11months old and am good, only to find out because of what i did, I would only be good enough to marry a man who was 64, after all in the new system it wont matter how old we are, we will all be young. No young witness men would ever want to marry me, yet I knew deep down that there were many having sex before they were getting married but they were ok, and i was evil. An elderly sister, (84) and one I visited alot, said to me, that only the good girls get pregnant and that she knew I was a good girl.
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36
Courting couples in the JW having sex together before marriage?
by chikikie ini left about 8 years ago, at the grand old age of 24, basically being an unmarried mum of 1 (baptised when my girl was 11months old) and the 'tipping point for me' when elder sisters tried to set me up for marriage to a 64year old elder, as that would be the only man willing to marry a girl such as myself.
i ran away, i moved 300miles away.
there should be a witness pretection programme ;).
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chikikie
The only reason i mentioned this was, when I was 23, a teenage friend of mine, she was 17, and engaged to a nice brother 25, bought a condom in the ladies when I was with her. I said whats that for? she looked at me and didnt say anything. They got married.
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36
Courting couples in the JW having sex together before marriage?
by chikikie ini left about 8 years ago, at the grand old age of 24, basically being an unmarried mum of 1 (baptised when my girl was 11months old) and the 'tipping point for me' when elder sisters tried to set me up for marriage to a 64year old elder, as that would be the only man willing to marry a girl such as myself.
i ran away, i moved 300miles away.
there should be a witness pretection programme ;).
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chikikie
sexual dysfunction, makes me wonder how they have children!
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36
Courting couples in the JW having sex together before marriage?
by chikikie ini left about 8 years ago, at the grand old age of 24, basically being an unmarried mum of 1 (baptised when my girl was 11months old) and the 'tipping point for me' when elder sisters tried to set me up for marriage to a 64year old elder, as that would be the only man willing to marry a girl such as myself.
i ran away, i moved 300miles away.
there should be a witness pretection programme ;).
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chikikie
I left about 8 years ago, at the grand old age of 24, basically being an unmarried mum of 1 (baptised when my girl was 11months old) and the 'tipping point for me' when elder sisters tried to set me up for marriage to a 64year old elder, as that would be the only man willing to marry a girl such as myself. I ran away, I moved 300miles away. There should be a witness pretection programme ;)
Anyway something that has bothered me for a while is that their are many unreported that courting couples actually having their wedding night sex before the actually marriage?
ANYONE ELSE HEARD OF IT?