Posts by darnkid

hello all.. in thes spirit of another thread i read where the boyfriend was badgering our poster about the religion saying he wanted her to forget it and not go back... do you have friends that worry?

my best friend is always asking me... do you think you will go back?.

do you think its because when we were in we so vehemently proclaimed we believed it?

darnkid

My friends (the few I have managed to find upon leaving) ask me that because my children won't have anything to do with me. They know how painful it is not only to lose your parents and your children, but to come out of it also with no base of friends to lean on.

My answer is always NO. Even though it is painful, even though I will miss out on their weddings and babies (I am bad association even for grandbabies), and they would miss out on whatever wedding I may be blessed with someday, I cannot live as a hypocrit and a fake like I did for 30 some years. It nearly, literally, killed me.

27

New understanding

by darnkid in

jw
friends

i am disfellowshipped and i have two girls who live with their dad.

all of them are witnesses.

my oldest is 19 and baptized.

darnkid

I am disfellowshipped and I have two girls who live with their Dad. All of them are witnesses. My oldest is 19 and baptized. She does not come over to my house anymore and only talks to me about her health or education. (I managed to get her into college!). My youngest just turned 17 and I have one more year until she stops coming over.

My question is this, I made mention to my ex about being able to meet any brother my daughter may wish to marry because my father, who was an elder for years, was at one point disfellowshipped, during the time I was dating/engaged to my ex and the two of them never talked. My dad was reinstated one week before my wedding. He now says he had misinformation and that he could have gotten to know my ex ahead of time. When I mentioned to my ex about meeting anyone he said there was "new thinking". I did not ask him what, did not want to give him the satisfaction-he loves that I am out on the fringe and that they are all "his".

Does anyone know of any new thinking on this? Isn't who they marry "family business" and something they can discuss with me?

17

My First Christmas

by excito-are in

jw
friends

hey everyone.

i have decieded to celebrate my first christmas this year.

i was a born in jw and now aged 32 and having not been to a meeting in a year this is a big step for me.

darnkid

I had my first Christmas in 2003. It was the first and last with my two girls. They went to live with their Dad so that they could be witnesses. My 19 year old is baptised and doesn't visit anymore. My youngest just turned 17-so I have one year left with her. I guess things are still a bit tough for me.

However, my favorite holiday is Christmas. I have a small tree (my house is very small) that I put up and decorate. I love to look at the lights at night. What makes a good Christmas you ask? LOVE. Spend the time with those you LOVE and it will always be great. Don't go overboard on gifts and get into debt-not worth it. Remember--LOVE-that is what makes christmas.

26

Who remembers the Circuit Orchestra's? How good was yours?

by eyeslice in

jw
friends

in the days before 'simplification', the days of 3 day circuit assemblies (fri evening plus sat & sun), when we used have catering departments that cooked and served up hot meals, we also used to have circuit orchestras.. i must say ours was pretty poor though, only matched by the lacklustre singing.. eyeslice.

(bee in his bonnet since mrs eyeslice went to singing practice at local kh on sunday evening).

darnkid

I spent 2 years playing in the orchestra at the assembly. I played the violin. I hated it.

13

most rude behaviour experienced from elders...

by Albert Einstein in

jw
friends

what was the weirdest and most rude thing you experienced / witnessed from elders?.

my favourite one is called george.

he was a po in the cong, where i became an elder (i was young and absolutely unexperienced).

darnkid

How 'bout being literally on the brink of suicide because of mental/emotional/sexual abuse by your husband and being told you have no grounds to leave him?

Course, the elder that told me that was later disfellowshipped for adultery.

5

hate the sin, love the sinner

by carla in

jw
friends

a friend of mine had a sibling that went missing in life for quite a while, the sibling leads a life quite contrary to her & her husbands belief system.

the sibling has traveled cross country to see the family.

due to many different circumstances & finances the family has not seen the sibling in many, many years.

darnkid

I left the truth some 10 years ago. It was after I got divorced (Gasp!) and started smoking (triple Gasp!!!). Anyway, my kids were small then and their dad left the truth as well, he DA'd himself. When he finally convinced the girls to give up the truth and have Christmas he surprised them on Christmas Day, no less, that they were all going back to the truth!!

Now my oldest daughter is baptised and over 18. She won't come to my house. I could not celebrate her recent graduation with her. I have no idea what her wedding will be like. She told me that she isn't even sure if her future children will be able to spend time with me without supervision.

My youngest daughter is to turn 17 shortly. She is not baptised yet but is actually stronger than her father and sister in the truth. So I know it won't be long before she gets baptised. So I have a little over 1 year left with her.

I speak to my parents about once every six months-I call them so that they have to talk to me.

Who ever thought up the idea to alienate people this way so that they could see the error of their ways was so wrong. If anything it makes me even more sure that I made the right decision to leave. It feels like my heart is being ripped out at times, but I was so worn out with pretending that I became suicidal and knew I was done with it.

Has my life improved? I have finally managed to develop a very small circle of friends, but am still alone most of the time. I do believe in God and when things are tough I just tell myself that He will take care of everything. Okay, so sometimes that doesn't help!! But I am trying, even after 10 years, to build some kind of life.

And yes, when I was growing up as a witness we were taught to still love the person but to hate what they did. I guess their thinking has changed on that, you know, "the light keeps getting brighter", at least that is what they always said when some thinking changed.

I don't see much love in THEIR God.