I am with BabaYaga, anger is definitely a stage of the grieving process that all of us have to go through, but it is not a good place to stay. Life is too short and there is too much to enjoy about life to stay there. If we stay there, then we give the WT power to negatively dominate the rest of our lives. I had some positive and happy years as a witness but as that started to change and I began to see things differently, it just wasn't a healthy place for me to stay. I understand fully why some are there. It was a place of structure and security that I needed, when I needed it. Even though it was a false sense of security, it felt good when I had nothing else. Now, I know there are other places that are more healthy that could have helped me to have the same sense of self that the witnesses gave me, and I wouldn't have all the things to try to undo that I have, but at the same time, who knows how different my life decisions would have been and what other baggage I might have as a result. So I am not looking backward. I am thankful for the good in my life and thankful that I can look forward in a new direction now. I leave the bitterness in my coffee cup at the bottom every morning. :o)
looking4peace
JoinedPosts by looking4peace
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22
Sign In If Not Bitter... Pretty Please!
by Doubtfully Yours ini have a few discomforts with the wbts, but it's mostly my own attitude, not that i'm bitter towards the religion.. if you're anouther 'not bitter' soul, please give me a shout out.. dy .
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looking4peace
Little old me.
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Have You Ever Bought Something From An Infomercial?
by minimus ini was reading an article from a magazine quoting consumer reports saying that most infomercials say that their products are so much better than another but the reality is often it's not true.. i'm curious; did you ever buy something because of an infomercial?
if so, what?.
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looking4peace
Denial, how can you possibly hate the Magic Bullet! I LOVE mine! Of course, I do not use it to create entire meals like the infomercial shows. It's terrible for soups, etc. but for blending homemade salad dressings, we use it every week and to chop herbs, etc., it is so much better than a stick blender because everything is enclosed, so the ingredients don't come flying out of the container. Sorry you think it's a piece of crap. To me, it is the greatest invention since sliced bread.
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confused, scared and worst of all, teenager.
by torn in two son inmy dad woke up about 3 years ago and said nothing.
my sister woke up about a year ago.
my mom about a month ago, myself shortly after.
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looking4peace
You're pretty fantastic people too, TITS. :o) Look forward to getting to know your family better in the days and years to come. Know we are here for you. Together, we can all make it through this crazy transition in our lives. Ciao!
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Some Conclusions I Have Reached
by AllTimeJeff ini wonder if everyone here who has kept up with me since i left jw's realize why i have been coming on here.
it certainly has been cool to know that some of my experiences and opinions have helped some.
i hope they know that i have been equally helped by others.. i come here primarily for me.
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looking4peace
Thank you for your thoughtful expressions, ATJ. I am new to this forum, but always enjoy your ideas as expressed. I applaud your future goals and the details you have shared about the process you went through to get where you are today. Ditto to your expressions of appreciation to the posters here that have helped you flesh things out. It is so wonderful that we are all free to go through the process, each at our own pace and in our own way, as members of this board. The freedom of expression here is energizing and empowering. All the best to you!
L4P
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37
confused, scared and worst of all, teenager.
by torn in two son inmy dad woke up about 3 years ago and said nothing.
my sister woke up about a year ago.
my mom about a month ago, myself shortly after.
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looking4peace
Torn-in-two-son,
Welcome! I can just imagine that your life feels like it is spinning right now. All the advice here to give yourself plenty of time to let things settle down is very sage. Your immediate family is indeed a blessing of support to get you through the toughest part of sorting out all of your other relationships. As long as you think through every step carefully, rather than acting on emotions as they hit, you will end up with the best case scenario possible in this circumstance. That may not mean that every relationship you value is intact, but at least you won't have shrapnel flying everywhere as if a bomb went off. So far for me, the less you say to anyone J-dub, the better. A line that helps me if people ask why I'm not active anymore is "Thank you for asking. I know it means you really care, but I have the right to keeping some things personal." End of story. Repeat often.
Welcome to the boards.
L4P
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If Witnesses boast about going to meetings so much.....
by kurtbethel in....then why do they not have the time of their services listed??.
so much for their boast about the preaching work in all lands.. .
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looking4peace
Usually they do post the meeting times, though they are often on a smaller placard near the door of the hall, rather than on a big sign out front. They would never share in a multi-denominational gathering place like the photo shows, I don't think, even if the meeting times were all different. =)
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Talked to a good friend
by EmptyInside ini had one of the best days i've had in a long time.
it was cold and snowy so i declared my own snow day.
and went for a walk with my dog in 13 degrees fahrenheit while treading through snowy slush.
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looking4peace
Glad you reconnected with an old friend. Today is a new day!
L4P
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16
Sunk Costs
by zarco init is interesting that many who do not believe any more or others with good thinking abilities choose to remain a witness.
i believe that the sunk costs are the reason... i will explain more below.
i also think this is why maybe even the governing body or other decision-makers at bethel are so reluctant to own up to real truth.
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looking4peace
Sunk costs can indeed be tough to swallow, but if one stays in after realizing the costs, aren't they guaranteeing nothing but their entire future is tied up in sunk costs? Whereas in economics and gambling, there is a chance, no matter how small, that there might be a return if conditions change, is there ANY evidence to suggest there is anything but sunk costs in a future tied up in the WTS? For me, the decision is "no." Still, I wish the best to each one and the decision they must live with in their own circumstance. Thanks for some interesting food for thought Zarco. :o)
L4P
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A picture I should have taken 25 years ago...a personal story
by JustHuman14 inthis picture was my graduation from high school.
i wasn't there to take that photo along with my classmates and teachers.. .
25 years have gone ever since...still after all those years, many times in my dreams i used to watch my self taking that final picture.
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looking4peace
Your regrets are heartwrenching and painful. I hope you are healing. Even though the time cannot be bought back, I hope you are finding joy in your life choices now and that you feel rich rewards for the changes you have made. I am so sorry.
L4P