Sorry for the difficulties you and your partner are experiencing PLAYGROUND.
A good Psychologist will explain that sometimes some of our stress and anxiety is caused by "cognitive dissonance".
This occurs when there is a conflict between our behaviour and our beliefs.
You may have been taught a set of so-called "absolute" beliefs which are shaping your worldview. Sometimes such beliefs are truly unhelpful.
You are not in trouble with Jehovah unless you are a Pharisee (read Matt 23).
God does not expect you to remain in an abusive relationship that has no prospects.
So how does one become like the Boroeans: willing and able to examine our beliefs, and make adjustments?
CBT (Cognitive Behaviour Therapy) can be very helpful.
Personally I also found Bible study very helpful - specifically on the "Good News" according to Paul (especially in the book of Romans, and especially how a right standing with God cannot be earned, deserved or paid for, but is instead IMPUTED to those who believe and follow Jesus instead of Pharisees).