this weeks meeting under the section - living as 'christians', starts off with 'repentance makes a difference', which is a talk given by an elder taken from w06 11/15 27-28 par 7-9. in a nut shell it discusses those who have been disfellowshipped and then show repentance.
it then goes on to discuss reinstatement and how a certain amount of time must pass by before this can take place.
it makes the following point in the paragraph.. 'a disfellowshipped person is not automatically accepted back into the congregation after a certain amount of time has passed.
Yes indeed. One of my husbands family members got disfellowshipped for sleeping with a brother she was dating in the same hall. She got disfellowshipped and cut off from her whole family. Treated like a true leper by her flesh and blood while the brother she slept with did NOT get disfellowshipped and the family still kept active communication with him.
Talk about twisted hypocrisy. Stuff like this is the reason I will never go back!!
given recent posts on the forum and discussion, maybe we could play this game: would i lie to you?
in the uk we have this tv programme where minor celebrities tell weird or embarrassing stories about themselves and the rest of the participants have to guess if it is a true story or made up.
when the others have voted then the person reveals if the story is true or false.
We've been lied to already by the WT Organization why continue the trend and lie to one another on here to only cause division and mistrust?
In my opinion by encouraging this it paints everyone here in a bad light and only feeds the negative connotation jw'lurkers and WT adherents feel about apostates anyway that all we do is lie.
so i was hoping to get some insight on this subject of telling your spouse that you no longer believe in god.
for two people who have been jehovahs witnesses for 20 years together, talking about this seems to be real hard for me.
i still pray with my wife before meals but that's about it.
My hubby and I are both born in's. It was frightening to try and think of way to break the news.
What I did that helped lessen the initial impact of my decision was to sit down together calmly hand and hand and gently explain that what I was about to say was going to be hard to hear but that I wanted to be honest. I gave him the option that if he couldnt handle what I was about to tell him and felt that he needed to leave the relationship that I would understand. I explained calmly that I no longer believed and let this sink in. It no doubt hurted him and he cried as he realized all our jw dreams together just got blown up but after the initial shock his commitment and love for me outweighed the break up of the religious aspect.
It was the mistake that I made months later in overloading him with too much anti -WT and debating with him over the religion that caused him running to family who in turn ran to the elders. So Don't do that. Just tell her how you feel then let her get over the initial shock and leave it be. Dont go into any further details and ask that she can respect your religious differences.
Hopefully her love for you will outweigh the wt indoctrination.
Best wishes
Lostwun
jt further expounds on why we left the watchtower.
why we left the jehovah's witnesses part 2.
i found this interesting article at a website i visit quite often:.
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/08/dealing-with-difficult-relatives/.
he makes some great points on dealing with difficult relatives, and many of his points (not all though) can be applied to jw relatives with whom you need to "lay down the law".. i highlighted my favorite points (yellow) and added some comments in red:.
i was having dinner at olive garden with my cousin who was disfellowshipped for apostacy.
a holier than thou pioneer couple saw us.
if that was not enough i saw her take a picture of me with my cousin.
these are some of the things the wbt$ 'taught' me:.
dishonesty is fine if it's to trick people into joining the cult.. if your spouse stops believeing, the best thing you can do is break up the family.. the laws of the governing body overrule any other laws...or else!.
my friends are conditional.. avoid loving people, they'll only let you down or get df'd.. unintelligent dumbos are better than intelligent ones if the dumbos are elders or above.. hate is better than love.. i am not good enough and god will probably enjoy killing me.. demons will appear in my room at night.. ignore practicallity if being practical or loving prevents the leaders getting money or praise.. god hates.
Honestly I feel that as a witness you have to attribute every good thing that you learn or ever do to the privilege of being part of the organization. You could never take personal credit for you own abilities or creativeness. The org was the reason for your talent and skills because after all you only know god and morals because of them right?
So what did I learn as a jw?
To doubt my own abilities and talent.
Hell, not anymore..
The org may win some but it just...LOSTWUN
i have been lurking here for about 6 months, and being the last day of the year, and ready to start the new one afresh, i want to share the story of our exit from the org.
i have found the personal experiences of others of immeasurable value, (and its been a while since a good exit story has been posted) that i hope this can be of benefit to at least someone.. .
my mother became a jehovahs witness when i was about 9 or 10. i remember initially hating all of the new sanctions put on our lives (no birthdays and christmas anymore) but for some reason i soon after joined her in attending the meetings and eventually got baptized at the age of 14. my staunch catholic father converted a couple of years later.
Hello Mrs O and welcome :)
I thoroughly enjoyed reading your story and im glad that things worked out for you and your husband and that you have awaken!
Your story gives me hope that someday my husband might just come around too.
:)
"The org may win some but it just..Lostwun"
so, it's that time of year again.
here's a few of my predictions.
) no armageddon.
I Have a funny feeling im going to get caught doing something pagan in 2016 and get disfellowshipped thereby ending my fade...
We'll see. Going with the gut for now
i am not sure if this was posted before.
i am the mother of an 10 year old and i would have never treated my son like this for wanting to go to college, believes in evolution & is an atheist...i am disgusted how this jw mother can't see how her son has the freedom of thought or religion.... this poor kid most likely does not do drugs or is in a street gang, he just wants to go to college for crying out loud.... this is insane, just shows how a religion or organization blinds all logic from you... it's a cult..... i know there are many cult jws parents out there who would do this, its insane and disgusting.... where is the love you say you should have towards your children?
this is straight out abuse.... read the article but scroll down for the recording.... .
Khaleesi its impossible for jw's to accept you have a brain of your own and fully capable of making your own decisions without the 7 men in Brooklyn making it for you.
Something has to be wrong with you. Thats the only justifiable way they can understand in their conditioned minds.
For example my FIL implied that I was a paranoid schizo because I no longer wanted any part of the religion and also because i called him out on his blatant disrespect and busybody noiseness in my marriage and personal religious decision.
To him, standing up for myself and talking back to a man equated craziness in the head. Its unheard of in the patriarchal religion therefore it doesnt surprise me that this woman equates her child as mental for thinking on his own.
Its a sad reality waking up and having family still trapped in the borg mindset.
