when they announced disfellowshipping of certain individuals in your congregation?
were you shocked?
tell me about it.
Hardly anyone in our cong was ever disfellowshipped so when they announced two in one evening! It was a brother (who was always chasing skirt despite being married with kids) and a sister no-one really knew and they had to specify that they were unrelated cos everyone would have got the wrong idea.
I was shocked, as I have been at finding out about every disfellowshipping, although it always seemed more dramatic from the platform.
MMXIV
remember, the topic in the reasoning book, conversation stoppers.
well, did they actually work against you or for you?.
are there conversation stoppers that you use now at your place of work or the bar, or with your significance other, that you use?.
I rarely tried to get around conversation stoppers - it seemed just plain rude to ignore or disregard what people said, especially when they were just trying to be polite.
When JW's call now I use "I know why you're calling but I'm not interested - thank you anyway" and rapidly close the door.
MMXIV
since the sheparding visit a few weeks ago i have had three phone calls and two drop bys from the elders .
we have been gone both times they stopped by (but our son saw them and did not answer the door ).
the phone messages are directed to me not my husband, and the one left today he sounded a bit on edge .
It's the same mentality as when calling back on a return visit over and over when they're not home. I must admit I used to do that cos it beat doing first call. Once a householder came to the door and asked why I kept calling and I said "Cos you weren't at home" to which she replied "I just didn't want to answer the door". I can take a hint now but clearly your elders can't.
They'll probably continue to pester you unless you call them and say you don't need the information. Personally I'd ignore them cos I'm just that way inclined. I feel your frustration though.
MMXIV
paragraph 17 states: "how should we respond when rumors about fellow believers are circulated by gods enemies?".
what about: "how we should respond when rumours about fellow believers are circulated by fellow believers?
my family was continually a victim of sewer level slander (not even gossip that resulted in murder - not physical but a character assassination.
They say the British press are the worst where gossip and slander are concerned. Having had a job dealing with them for a high profile company I found them not too dissimilar to an average congregation. I was therefore expertly qualified to manage issues that arose. No-where have I come across so much two-faced b1tching as in KH's.
MMXIV
i've always been told that i have a very good personality, that i'm humorous, etc.. one elder called me over and said that i was "smiling too much".
the other elders talked to the elder who counseled me and he came back to say that i should be like i was .
.
For watching an 18 (R-rated) Arnie movie (Total Recall) at the cinema with a load of other witlesses. Came up smelling of roses - I claimed I was so shocked by the violence I had to close my eyes through most of it, I hadn't walked out because I didn't want to cause offense to the study who'd suggested we view it in the first place and I would never want to see anything like it again. They didn't clock that I was 17 so shouldn't have even been there - I was made an MS shortly afterwards. Roll on three years and I went to see Pulp Fiction straight from FS
For having designer stubble. I was told it was unprofessional and asked if my intention was to grow it longer into a beard which would be acceptable??!! I said no and managed to get the most professional jobs anyone in that KH ever held with stubble.
When reading out the accounts report I was counselled for stating what the total funds were in the bank. I was asked not to do this as brothers would be less inclined to contribute. I replied it was a legal requirement and a stipulation from the society.
For not putting in a FS report despite going on the ministry as it would distort the figures. They didn't in truth know how to handle that one
MMXIV
were you a fish out of water?.
were you popular in your congregation?.
were you a "marked" person?.
Treated me really well when I was young, pioneering, reaching out etc.
When I fell from grace some elders totally ignored me but others in my peer group made a real point of standing by me and some elders were great.
When I didn't go to many meetings and kept a low profile (long fade) people just kind of ignored me which was perfect albeit made those minutes before and after meetings tough.
In one congregation I wasn't treated badly I just didn't seem to exist for 10 months until I gave an arresting talk. At least 20 people spoke to me afterwards; love bombing like it was the second coming. I got input from a Jewish lecturer when preparing the talk and delivered it like I was a CO - it was the best talk I'd ever given and my last by choice for a long time. It has always been so much easier for brothers to get noticed and take the limelight - it's all about platform time.
MMXIV
I'd agree with Wobble - never yet met a bad Paul and most have been decent , a cut above and always taking the pick of the girls. You certainly couldn't describe besty as "little man" - but then maybe that's why he's known as besty and not Paul.
MMXIV
reading jeff's thread about dress made me think of my one and only trip to bethel.. i can't remember if i was babtised at the time, but i went with a bus load of jws.. like someone said in the last thread, printing presses and empty rooms.
i was very disapointed, however i don't think i had any pre-concieved notions of what it would be like.
what i was diapointed in was so much of the "tour" was walking hallways looking at exhibits behind glass.
London - very antiquated, large rooms with aged but clean decor. I think Bro Bullock tastefully chose shades of brown for longevity.
Canada - bit deserted when I was there - the landscaping was being re-done so lots of concrete on show
Patterson - whilst being built got an in depth tour of the water treatment facilities - that was a hoot.
Brooklyn - I wondered why JW's passing each other in the street didn't all say hello (I must have been young and naive). I was fascinated to see original paintings from the revelation book on the walls. Saw bro Gangas in the infirmary - now that was a real surprise - how could someone so old and with such limited energy be a part of the GB?
Ireland - it's a house with an ugly extension at the back - it ain't a bethel - there were only 12 or 14 people assigned there and I recall some excuses being given that most of them were away on other assignments.
MMXIV
with the "generation change" and them changing it all the time it would make sence to dump it all togeather.. lets face it ,it can be disproved easly.. they dumped 1975 in a heart beat .. this would buy them all the time they wanted as they would just find another date to start the generation from ie: "the u.n year of peace and sercurty'',1986 i belive or whatever else they could think of.. they could sell it to the r&f as easly as they sold 1975,then dumped it when it did'nt happen .. anyone questioning them would be told they are running ahead of jehovah or lacking faith in his earthly org that feeds us food at the proper time .. what do you think?.
karter..
They'll just refer to 1914 less and less in publications over the coming years. They're just trying to pre-empt any mutterings of discontent in 2014 (which is an insignificant year anyway but may cause some to reflect).
MMXIV
sorry about the mishap on my previous post.
anyway i've been a member on this board for quite a while but mostly just lerking.
i've given just a tease about what my deal is on a previous post but this will be a little more in depth.
SAHARA, very interesting story, your gut feel has been pretty good. It seems that you have been fairly accommodating and non judgemental about your wife's JW family. From their point of view you were only ever acceptable company while you were
a) willing to accept occasional witnessing (magazines left around) b) they could count their time on you c) it was a show for your wife on what happy families you'd all be in the truth d) a potential JW.
Stopping that sneaky and rather dishonest method of studying with your child would have, as you said, made you an opposer in their eyes. No need to keep up the pretence of being nice to you, they'd rather punish you and make you feel their disapproval.
Your wife seems to prefer to avoid confrontations and is happier taking the path of least resistance, or rather the path that least offends people. I wonder if your wife tells her family how irregular she is at meetings. The fact she is irregular shows she has issues with it. If she does ever discuss those issues or her family - listen, listen, listen and ask the odd question that doesn't require a response but will get her to think.
MMXIV
