I never wanted to play by their rules and write a signed, DA letter. I went so far as to even disregard their little JC meeting that they had set up for me. Instead, I preempted their decision and let them know, via letter through my wife, that I wasn't going to waste their time or mine on a meeting in which the outcome had already been predetermined[by the service department]. I wanted them to DF me in abstentia. DA'ing yourself means following their playbook. At the time of my df'ing, the old verbage was still being used. I wanted the congo to know I was df'd and that I had not da'd myself.
From the time I can remember, someone who was df'd was looked more favorably upon than someone who da'd themself. I know that sounds dumb - "looked more favorably upon" - but it is true in a sense. Growing up, I had always felt that people who da'd themselves intentionally turned their back and would never return. They were viewed as the more outcast of the two. They were the ones who you would more likely shun if you ran into them in a social situation. Anyway, that is how I always viewed it.