I had known it was not 'The Truth' for many many years and just kept going because of not wanting to hurt my parents and later, for the sake of my marriage.
It all started a few years after I was baptised when I found a load of books and Watchtowers going back to Russell and Rutherford on a book shelf in the house of a very elderly brother, including a Birthday Book! I couldn't believe what I was reading and how the Society had changed so many of its doctrines. The scales fell from my eyes that day but I was terrified of telling anyone how I felt for fear of being disfellowshipped and shunned by everyone.
I started to fade as best I could after the birth of my second child using every excuse I could think of to miss meetings and not go out knocking doors, but was just considered 'weak'. There was no internet support in those days and I wasn't even aware that there were other JWs who felt the same way I did.