kaykay_mp

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Posts by kaykay_mp

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  32

  Funny Secrets!

  by whyamihere in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  does anyone have a secret that they have hid for years and it is too funny not to say anything and want to come out now?.

  ok....lol...this is so bad!

  you know the campbell's soup glass jars that have a top you can twist open?

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  kaykay_mp

  I can't believe I'm telling you guys this:

  At my first duty station, I was single and loving it, so I was a bit of a loose woman. I was invited to this guy's barracks room and this other guy came along, and we did some stuff. The other guy broke out his brand new video camera, but I was so drunk that I didn't care. Until the next day, that is. I ran back to his room and told him about it. At first he told me that he burned the tape. I didn't believe him, so he finally said that the video will never be shown to anyone else other than close friends (much better answer but I still didn't believe him). I knew the situation was out of my hands, but I'm hoping that he didn't put it out on the internet!

  laters

  kaykay_mp
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  102

  Fuming, Angry, seething, seeing RED!!!!!!!!!!

  by Gill in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  my parents went to the assembly this weekend.

  they were telling me about disciplining children... the speaker was saying how all babies are born selfish and demanding for their own needs and not anyone elses.

  the jist of the talk being about discipline, and training children ...ie taking them out for a good beating.. well, i don't know if any of you have ever 'just seen red!

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  kaykay_mp

  Hope I wasn't being all grubby with the last post. I just get all excited talking about psychology and I just thought that the dumbass that was giving that talk about child discipline was channeling Freud.

  Carry on guys.

  laters

  kaykay_mp
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  35

  Do you look like someone Famous ?

  by rwagoner in

  1. jw
  2. friends

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  what is the lesson here ?

  --- never let your 6 year old pick your halloween costume !

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  kaykay_mp

  I've never been told what celebrity I look like. Frankly, I don't even know that myself. The closest thing I've ever had to someone telling me who I look like was this pioneer sister handing me an Asleep! magazine and turning to this page of this African lady at an assembly and saying "I just thought I'd let you know how much this lady looks just like you!" and you could tell she was excited to tell me this because it looked like she was going to wet her pants at any moment.

  Oh-kay.

  laters

  kaykay_mp
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  35

  Do you look like someone Famous ?

  by rwagoner in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .

  what is the lesson here ?

  --- never let your 6 year old pick your halloween costume !

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  kaykay_mp

  rwagoner: that's a hilarious picture, but it's so darn cute!

  laters

  kaykay_mp
• 
  102

  Fuming, Angry, seething, seeing RED!!!!!!!!!!

  by Gill in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  my parents went to the assembly this weekend.

  they were telling me about disciplining children... the speaker was saying how all babies are born selfish and demanding for their own needs and not anyone elses.

  the jist of the talk being about discipline, and training children ...ie taking them out for a good beating.. well, i don't know if any of you have ever 'just seen red!

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  kaykay_mp

  The speaker was saying how all babies are born selfish and demanding for their own needs and not anyone elses. The jist of the talk being about discipline, and training children ...ie taking them out for a good beating.

  That guy's been reading too much Freud.

  Psychology for Dummies: Freud had a theory that all babies are born with the Id (the Ego--which governs the Id, and the superego--which keeps both the Id and the Ego in check through guilt--are developed by age 4), which runs on the "pain-pleasure" principle (sex and aggression). Basically saying--if it feels good, do it; if you don't like something, screw everyone else, I'm getting it now.

  laters

  kaykay_mp
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  45

  WHAT'S THE WORST JOB YOU EVER HAD?

  by Mary in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the worst one i ever had was working in a frozen chicken factory.

  there were about 30 of us in a freezing cold room and my shit job was to feel the half-frozen chicken breasts up, to see if there were any little bones in them.

  well after the first 5 minutes my frigging fingers were frozen stiff, so i couldn't tell if there were any bones in there or not........after 20 minutes it felt like my hands were having an out of body experience and if they weren't in front of my frozen face, i would've thought they had dropped off.

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  kaykay_mp

  The worst job I can think of was working as a cashier at McDonald's right after I graduated high school. In a matter or 3 months, I had my checkbook stolen from me right out of my locker, this fry cook tried to cop a feel/bang me behind the dumpster numerous times (kicked him in the nuts, but surprisingly I didn't lose my job), fell on my ass and nearly broke it because the manager (who was studying to be a Witless) decided it would be a good idea for me to mop after a messy birthday party, and last but not least, all the customers that would come in and give me the "I'm so much better than you because I'm not working here" look on their faces (the place happened to be in an upper-class neighborhood). I got my own back a couple of times, though (besides the nutcracker incident).

  The craziest thing to ever happen during my stint there was this Hindu family that came in and wanted cheeseburgers with no meat (which I understand why they don't eat meat). Gee, wouldn't it have been easier to grab some bread, cheese and butter at the grocery store and make some grilled cheese sandwiches? Guess you liked our bread better. Hmm, let me ring this up for you...7 cheeseburgers, no burger, let me go to the back and make sure the cook got the order right....

  The only good thing about the job was the seniors who would come in every day for their discount coffee. They always made me smile before the day got really bad. Except for one--this health nut guy would always come in and order his usual McGrilled Chicken (or whatever you call it) with nothing on it. It wasn't that--I was always getting crazy-ass orders--it was the fact that he stunk to high heaven of garlic and sweat. Sir, you know that they do make pills with garlic in them, right? Oh, ok. Smell ya later, sir.

  laters

  kaykay_mp
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  115

  Funniest WT Pics.....

  by Preston in

  1. social
  2. humour

  i thought this was "bull" from night court when i was a kid.... .

  lucille ball?!

  ?...from "i love lucy"??!?!?.

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  kaykay_mp

  The lady on the right side of the picture reminds me of the lady on Bewitched that was always being nosy:

  "Abner! AAAAAAAAAAAAAbner! Will you put that gun down! There's that witch who lived next door to us. Hurry up and help me drag her outta that pile and I'll prove it to you!"

  Abner: "You crazy bitch. *pow!*"

  laters

  kaykay_mp
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  25

  lets get the elders stoned

  by what_Truth? in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  thinking about vallis assembly post on the other board made me think of an evil idea.

  suppose you were at an assembly eating lunch with the elder about to give the next talk (one of those two hour groaners).

  all of a sudden he leaves to use the bathroom and you have a chance to sneak an illegal narcotic of your choice into his food*.

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  kaykay_mp

  I'd try putting cocaine on his french toast (to make it look like powdered sugar). I don't think the taste would fool him though, but they've been fooled by a cult, so anything is possible.
  

  I could imagine the look on his face when his whole mouth goes numb. Forget midway through the talk--he'd be wired before he steps foot on the stage! The 45-minute talk would take 15 minutes because he'd be so wired. Everyone would be annoyed by him tapping the podium and licking his lips every 3 seconds. What would be really embarassing though would be the fact that his nose wouldn't stop running and he'd have a hanky in his hand the whole time. Then he would probably go the the room for nursing mothers to crash after he came down.

  I'm a nut.

  laters

  kaykay_mp
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  70

  My Book of Bible Stories

  by Taylor S. in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i just got my hands on a copy of my book of bible stories ... (1978).

  at first i was excited when a friend pulled it out of his bag, said he'd gotten it as a kid.

  then i started flipping through, looking at the pictures, feeling the memories spin in my brain.

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  kaykay_mp

  I remember when the put the Bible Stories on tape. It was this big flimsy vinyl case with like 10 tapes inside. My grandparents played them so much that one of the tapes had messed up and it sounded like it was playing backwards. The guy that was doing the voice-overs sounded creepy anyway. But I could have sworn that I heard Satanic messages when the messed up tape was playing--it was the coolest thing I'd ever heard then. Truly one of the highlights of my miserable young Witless life.

  laters

  kaykay_mp
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  14

  Mexican Poppies!!

  by kaykay_mp in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  yes, finally, my peeps.

  after promising you guys for a month that i would take some pictures of the rare mexican poppy.

  these babies are annual bloomers, only staying for about a month or two.

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  kaykay_mp

  Don't worry, Heat. You're not the only one who does that sort of thing on this forum. I say a lot of things here, and then I say to myself 5 minutes later, "I musta been smoking some good s**t when I wrote that" (and occasionally I am). That is probably why I only have 2 friends where I live, not many people can handle the fact that I say what I feel. 60% of the time, I think before I speak, though.

  laters

  kaykay_mp