When I was a born in JW I thought apostates were the crazy born again christian believers.
I remember (when I was about 16yo) to see a book in a shop intitled "Jehovah, a false god". I was very scared with that book.
I also remember (when I was about 14yo) a book from David Reed in my uncle's house.
But I never even touched such books.
In 2000 when I was 18yo I searched for the first time "Jehovah's Witnesses" in internet and came a result of a site called "Watching the Watchtower". I turned off the page at same time.
In 2004 when I was in an informatic class I searched the JW's again and for the first time I read something apostate. It was a story about an elder who left the WT and became a born again christian, the story was very subjective and full of whining. I reinforced my opionio about apostates being losers and leaving for personal offenses.
In 2006 I was bored at work then I decided to look on wikipedia about what the other religions thought about the Babylon from revelation book. I was very surprised with the article about the JW view, because it was plainly CORRECT! I expected hate speech and misinformation about the JW's even from wikipedia.
But I found something very strange in the JW page on wikipedia, there's something about a man called Raymond Franz who was supposed an ex- GB member! I thought to myself: "bullshit, there's no such thing as an ex-GB member"! So I went to read the article on RF to disprove he was a real ex-GB member, and the rest is history and a lot of punches on my table and blood boiling in my veins.... LOL
I still remember my head spinning and the nausea while reading the 2 chapters from CoC in wikipedia links.