Posts by SEL

54

Temporarily tired of JW boyfriend. Should I: a) leave

by SEL in

or b) continue in my plan of eventually getting him out with steve hassan's help?.

option b is going to be expensive but not impossibly so.

but it would require more patience than i think i have.

SEL

You guys are right. It's hard to love someone, at least romantically, when thinking about them only makes me anxious and stressed. I guess we can't be a couple when one of us is a JW, but I'm reluctant to do something drastic like cut off contact, which just seems cruel.

jeckle, when we met he was in the process of getting reinstated and kept his JW past a secret. Then when he thought he needed to bring it up, he invented this elaborate lie where a couple JWs knocked on his door and he started studying with them and thought it made sense.

54

Temporarily tired of JW boyfriend. Should I: a) leave

by SEL in

or b) continue in my plan of eventually getting him out with steve hassan's help?.

option b is going to be expensive but not impossibly so.

but it would require more patience than i think i have.

SEL

As of now I'm still plowing ahead with this plan to get him out. But like yknot said, it's a time-consuming matter and sometimes I get frustrated and want to burn all the materials I have that relate to the Watchtower or cults.

I don't want to get him out so that I can get myself a non-JW husband. I really do want to get him out for his own sake. The question I'm trying to answer is whether it's my duty to help someone I deeply care about, regardless of what our relationship is. If God were to offer me a deal where he leaves the organization but our relationship would be over, I wouldn't hesitate for a second.

This guy works a part-time job to support himself as he devotes most of his time to the organization. His handful of non-JW friends apparently do not see a single problem with that.

I really appreciate all of your responses. I suppose only desperate people turn to strangers for advice, but I'm hardly the first person to do so in the Dating & Relationships forum on this site!

54

Temporarily tired of JW boyfriend. Should I: a) leave

by SEL in

or b) continue in my plan of eventually getting him out with steve hassan's help?.

option b is going to be expensive but not impossibly so.

but it would require more patience than i think i have.

SEL

or b) continue in my plan of eventually getting him out with Steve Hassan's help?

Option B is going to be expensive but not impossibly so. But it would require more patience than I think I have.

I've been writing here and there on this forum. At first didn't want to admit that I have the good old JW-friend problem but now I don't care. He didn't do anything. I'm just tired of him for no reason.

I've read Releasing the Bonds and to be honest I just don't know if I want to put in all that effort. If one person says that helping a friend/relative is one's duty and that I'd be selfish not to do something, then I'd go on trying to get him to leave (in fact I'm hoping someone would say so, because otherwise I don't have enough incentive to go on).

I do love him, most of the time. There was a time when we'd talk about how many children we want and what they might look like.

1

Anyone interested in being interviewed over phone/email about JW experience?

by SEL in

i am writing an article on the watchtower's impact on lives of people who have had any sort of connection to the organization (raised in it, converted, family member/friend/spouse is jw, etc.

) and am interested in talking to anyone who is willing to share.. i have no intention of publishing the article.

it's mostly for my own knowledge.

SEL

I am writing an article on the Watchtower's impact on lives of people who have had any sort of connection to the organization (raised in it, converted, family member/friend/spouse is JW, etc.) and am interested in talking to anyone who is willing to share.

I have no intention of publishing the article. It's mostly for my own knowledge. I realize that this entire forum is devoted to people's experiences with the Watchtower, but it's scattered among all the threads. My actual contact with the organization has been small, but for personal reasons that you could probably guess I've read a few books on the JWs and the Hassan book on cults, and I've been lurking on this site for a few months.

Send me a PM if you would have time for a phone convo (or email). I'd be happy to send anyone the finished piece.

36

NEW ELDERS BOOK

by elder-schmelder in

can someone email me a link to download the new eldersbook.. .

i need it asap.. .

SEL

36

NEW ELDERS BOOK

by elder-schmelder in

can someone email me a link to download the new eldersbook.. .

i need it asap.. .

SEL

Could someone send me the link as well?

Many thanks in advance!!!!

25

How often do disassociated people go back to the organization?

by SEL in

a friend disassociated in order to get divorced, hoping not to get disfellowshipped.

some time later, he has a serious non-jw girlfriend whom he'll probably end up marrying.

the thing is, he didn't disassociate because he no longer believed the wt doctrines.

SEL

Gayle--

I actually do not know this girl well at all. I wish I did, because I am in a somewhat similar situation. I know the guy better, and I only say that she'll never convert because she's not a Christian to begin with. It's ridiculous to tell someone what Jesus wants and doesn't want when they do not believe in Jesus in the first place. He's perfectly polite and a nice guy, but he actually cannot understand why his girlfriend won't take up his views.

One of the saddest, funniest things I ever saw- a conversation between this DA'd guy and his childhood friend who got reinstated, the latter telling the former that other religions do exist, so it shouldn't be that difficult to imagine someone not believing in "the truth".

25

How often do disassociated people go back to the organization?

by SEL in

a friend disassociated in order to get divorced, hoping not to get disfellowshipped.

some time later, he has a serious non-jw girlfriend whom he'll probably end up marrying.

the thing is, he didn't disassociate because he no longer believed the wt doctrines.

SEL

A friend disassociated in order to get divorced, hoping not to get disfellowshipped. Some time later, he has a serious non-JW girlfriend whom he'll probably end up marrying. The thing is, he didn't disassociate because he no longer believed the WT doctrines. I don't know this for sure, but it seems like he would really like it if his girlfriend would understand his religious beliefs and--of course-- maybe adopt them herself, which is not going to happen for her.

How likely is it that this guy is going to marry this girl, decide to go back to the organization, and then pressure her to convert?

34

What were the brothers obsession with 'The Big A' ? They wanted it so badly (and still do)

by Joliette in

i've been doing research for about a year, (omg all the things that i'm finding out.

its right around the corner!

i know that life can get bad, but how is the big a gonna make things better?

SEL

Has the Watchtower come up with a new prediction yet as far as when Armageddon is coming?

14

How long did it take until you had that 'light bulb' moment?

by Crash Override in

how long did it take for you to realize that something was very wrong with the 'truth'?.

for me, it was about 2 1/2 years into studying.

i'm a guy and i'm attracted to both guys and girls.

SEL

I've been reading this forum for a while but have never posted. A question for you guys: Is it possible to get somebody to have that lightbulb moment?

We're talking about a person raised in the religion, disfellowshipped for fornication, then reinstated more than a good decade later. Now the person is trying to be as good of a Witness as possible as far as going to meetings and going door-to-door, studying beforehand, etc. Person is also becoming pretty popular and getting "love-bombed" like Steve Hassan described in his book.

I can't begin to reason with this person, who is completely convinced that people deserve to be shunned when they are disfellowshipped as "Jehovah's discipline". Not a bit disturbed by the Society's flip-flopping on certain issues, has no interest whatsoever in the activities of the Governing Body.

For those of you who decided to leave the organization, how religious were you? Did you always have doubts or were you once a sincere Witness like the person described above?

I am not particularly religious, not raised JW. Person so far has no plans of cutting down on contact with me, also is good friends with another person who left the organization. Good sign? Painfully optimistic?