Very funny stuff Duncan.
Reminds me of a couple of brothers I know back in NY, when they were rehearsing the night before the assembly (in front of the CO). The householder was supposed to be receptive, but the CO wanted him to play a trick on the 'loyal' witness and act irate, and really catch the 'loyal' witness off guard. (all elders)
The 'irate' brother called the 'loyal' brother the night before, and told him of the CO's plan. The 'loyal' brother then planned a double cross on the CO.
At the rehearsal on Friday evening, the 'irate' householder delivered his lines with great compunction, and the 'loyal' Witness looked stunned! The CO burst out in laughter at his joke.
But then, the 'loyal' Witness pulled a gun out of his bookbag and says to the 'irate' householder, "Well, I think I've got something here that will change your mind!"
Of course, the CO had been 'double-crossed' and the joke was on him, but I often felt like the gun method may be the only thing they'll have left to convince anyone soon!