Posts by obfuscate

13

Don't fall through the "cracks"

by mrsObfuscate in

being able to understand and identify the "cracks" (i.e.

unintended consequences) in the many systems we are surrounded by had a profound influence on my ultimate decision to step away from the org.

i mentioned in my first post there were many nuanced details that added up to help me to finally take the steps i needed to exit, and this was a fairly big one.

obfuscate

smiddy -

Interesting observations. I can certainly understand a person who no longer believes just throwing it all in the scrap heap and getting on with their lives.

I recognised that falling through the cracks is due to a lack of awareness. There are many reasons for a lack of awareness - some external, some self imposed. How do we become more aware? Reading, listening, observing, educating ourselves. I maintain a fascination with the bible, theology, religion, etc partly informed by my years as a JW but also because the ways that humans contort themselves so that we can believe is just so incredible! My hope is that it helps me become more aware of similar patterns in other systems - political, fitness, health etc.

Cheers, Ob

13

Don't fall through the "cracks"

by mrsObfuscate in

being able to understand and identify the "cracks" (i.e.

unintended consequences) in the many systems we are surrounded by had a profound influence on my ultimate decision to step away from the org.

i mentioned in my first post there were many nuanced details that added up to help me to finally take the steps i needed to exit, and this was a fairly big one.

obfuscate

LevelThePlayingField

My husband shared a link with me to the transcripts and ended up following the whole thing.

MrsObfuscate

45

The story of my exit

by mrsObfuscate in

i have been lurking here for about 6 months, and being the last day of the year, and ready to start the new one afresh, i want to share the story of our exit from the org.

i have found the personal experiences of others of immeasurable value, (and its been a while since a good exit story has been posted) that i hope this can be of benefit to at least someone.. .

my mother became a jehovahs witness when i was about 9 or 10. i remember initially hating all of the new sanctions put on our lives (no birthdays and christmas anymore) but for some reason i soon after joined her in attending the meetings and eventually got baptized at the age of 14. my staunch catholic father converted a couple of years later.

obfuscate

Hi Magnum,

I've been around these parts for a good while, lurked on and off in between research, eventually signed up and posted under obfuscatetheobvious (left for a while and forgot the password when I returned, I think I set up a dummy email as well...you know, don't want to get caught).

I'm not a regular visitor here but when I have required the knowledge base that resides here, I have found it a deep well and an invaluable resource. For those that are regular posters (such as you Magnum) a huge thank you for taking the time to reply, challenge, comfort and cheer the many individuals who use this site on their journey to find out what gives their life meaning and purpose.

45

The story of my exit

by mrsObfuscate in

i have been lurking here for about 6 months, and being the last day of the year, and ready to start the new one afresh, i want to share the story of our exit from the org.

i have found the personal experiences of others of immeasurable value, (and its been a while since a good exit story has been posted) that i hope this can be of benefit to at least someone.. .

my mother became a jehovahs witness when i was about 9 or 10. i remember initially hating all of the new sanctions put on our lives (no birthdays and christmas anymore) but for some reason i soon after joined her in attending the meetings and eventually got baptized at the age of 14. my staunch catholic father converted a couple of years later.

obfuscate

Hey! You stole my story!😉

Couldn't be happier that we finally had that honest conversation and that it turned out we were heading in the same direction.

128

Participate In The EX-JW Personality Test!

by C0ntr013r in

first of all; i must admit that i'm not a huge fan of putting people in boxes like this, it is not an exact science.

but i still think the data can be quite interesting and i intend to collect it and share it in a structured way with you guys.

so without future ado here are the details.. link to test: .

obfuscate

Mrs Obfuscate - ISFJ

128

Participate In The EX-JW Personality Test!

by C0ntr013r in

first of all; i must admit that i'm not a huge fan of putting people in boxes like this, it is not an exact science.

but i still think the data can be quite interesting and i intend to collect it and share it in a structured way with you guys.

so without future ado here are the details.. link to test: .

obfuscate

Diss15- Same result (INTJ) with similar numbers.

31

A poll of sorts: How long have you been a "fader" for?

by SecretSlaveClass in

i'm curious about the following:.

1) how long have you been a fader for?.

2) how often do you still get pressure from congregation members and/or family to return as an active witness?.

obfuscate

1/ 5 years. Stopped cold turkey. A couple of years of barely repressed rage forced me to look at reality.

2/ Had 3 approaches in that time. On each occasion I thanked them for their concern, told them that I would contact them if I required assistance but that at the moment I required none.

3/ Wasn't really aware of others who faded until I left. Once my eyes were opened, I became aware of many that had faded and many more who were in a sort of JW purgatory that only led to JW hell.

4/ No fear. My path out led me very quickly to confirming my long held hunch that the elders are just plain old ordinary men. Not special, not fear inducing, not worthy of any more respect than any other human, certainly not worthy of giving them answers to questions that they had not worked to deserve. As with all humans that I interact with, I try to be honest, respectful and authentic - while being very clear on what personal information I am willing to divulge based on a reciprocated relationship of trust and care.

5/ I'm not shunned per se...I'm just now fully aware of the reality of my life all along. The vast majority of my relationships were conditional, shallow, one way streets.

6/ In the beginning, there was no conscious thought other than self preservation. My rage was becoming all consuming and I had a 3 year old and a newborn. I had no non JW friends and as it turns out no real JW friends either. My family are all zealots who are only interested in relationships for what they can get out of them.

7/ None since stopping.

8/ They may affect my life much the same way as drunk driver may affect my life but they have no power over me. Like a drunk driver, their actions may cause initial disbelief and anger and may even cause my life to veer off onto a path that I can't foresee. I cannot control how others act towards me but I can control if and how I respond and that power is the power I took back the day I left.

128

Participate In The EX-JW Personality Test!

by C0ntr013r in

first of all; i must admit that i'm not a huge fan of putting people in boxes like this, it is not an exact science.

but i still think the data can be quite interesting and i intend to collect it and share it in a structured way with you guys.

so without future ado here are the details.. link to test: .

obfuscate

INTJ

2596

The Pastor of my Old Church Tried to Re-Convert Me Yesterday

by cofty in

yesterday evening my wife and i were invited to friends house for new year's eve.

we met them when i was a christian and we have kept in touch.

they had a few other friends there as well, including the new church pastor and his wife.

obfuscate

Thank you Cofty for initiating this conversation and keeping it on topic. While it may seem intimidating to wade through all the pages, I am very glad that I did.

To all who participated - Thank You! (I was going to attempt to reply to at least the main contributors but that was going to be another 100 pages I think!)

Special mention to those who had the intellectual honesty to examine their arguments and engage constructively.

14

Paul Grundy

by Lozza Aussie in

jw
friends

hi all, been a while since i posted here.

i am in australia and heard paul grundy being interviewed by someone on abc radio in sydney.

it was good to put a voice to the guy on jw facts.

obfuscate

The program that Paul was interviewed on - "Conversations with Richard Fidler" - was an important source of external information for me at a time when I was afraid of external information but knew that something was not quite right. A very important interview for me was with Professor Robert Crotty - a Catholic priest and academic. He wrote a book called 3 Revolutions that outlined his journey from true believer to where he is today. Another really interesting interview on the same program was Nadine Brown.

The regular interviewer (Richard Fidler) has a very different style to Ellen Fanning (Paul's interviewer). Ellen was a 60 Minutes journo for a while and I think that sensationalist style was on show at times - the "slave" comment as an example. Paul did a great job keeping the interview on facts, trying to keep the emotion and animosity out of it, while presenting a very human story.

One of the recurring themes for the program is that it examines how people cope (or sometimes don't cope!) when they are faced with a situation or life circumstance that requires them to examine what they believe, why they believe it and whether those beliefs are the "self evident truths" that they imagined them to be. The fact that there are other people that are willing to take the bull by the horns and face these hard questions (some on an almost unimaginable scale) was an important factor in giving me the courage to make my own examination. I highly recommend having a browse thru the back catalogue.

As has been noted by others, JWFacts was also another important factor. As such, a very big thank you Paul for your hard work and persistence.