Hi Cygnus,
I have looked around a little after a very long time, what is going on in the English message boards, and the first message I read is yours.
Now, I don't know if you are kidding, I remember you as one who wrote what he meant. So I assume you are very serious about what you are saying.
I will not go into details about JW teaching and what you are able to accept or not. I only want to point out what your own message shows about your situation, and what this spells out about the future.
There are many marriages where the wife may meet her friends on a particular day, and the husband meets his. This doesn't seem to be the case in your situation. The JW obviously control your life. You are allowed to lead a "normal" marriage life, unless situations arise when you are not wanted. Now, what a situation is that, if you think of a different arrangement than the one you are actually in?
Let's assume, your wife wanted to arrange a "women only" night. So, you have to leave the house that night, or you can stay if you wear a woman's dress. Or, what would you think about someone meeting with his racist friends, and sending the spouse away that night, because he lives in a mixed marriage?
Actually, your reasoning shows similarities to situations like that. So the most important question is: What is your marriage based on? What will be left of it in 5, 10, 20 years? Why do you think your life will be better of if you violate your conscience for the rest of your life? Or better, will you be able to do it? Honestly, I expect you to be worse off in a couple of years, if not sooner, than you are now.