Posts by millie210

44

How do you manage to keep JW friendships after you left the organization?

by Bonsai in

jw
friends

it seems incredibly difficult.

those who leave the org.

(or fade) no longer have anything in common with jehovah's witnesses, nor do they want to stick around to get radiated by the fear and guilt that saturates every aspect of a witnesses' life.. i've lost all but one of my jw friends quite simply because i can no longer condone the evil things that they condone.

millie210

konceptual994 minutes agoThis was posted on an instagram account that is run by a JW locally
https://instagram.com/p/4PcLxeH4iV/?taken-by=stefleck_djmmx5_jw
It was as much as I could to not blow my cover and post a tirade about this being bollocks when talking about anyone who goes from being a Witness in "good standing" to one who has faded, no longer attends or is otherwise considered no longer in "good standing".
The irony of this statement is completely lost on the fawning commentators posting their crap about the org and true friendship.

Wow, that was rough to read....

When one of the flock bolts it sure stimulates the anxiety in the others doesnt it?

"I love you...I love YOU too.........I love you MORE...."

gag.

seriously. who talks that way???

well I do- but its to my puppy!

13

JWism retaking control of wife's family

by The JHWH in

a situation regarding this religion has developed which i fear might have negative implications on me and wifes lives, and i'm looking for thoughts and advice in how to approach the situation.

i'll start with some background information to enlighten the situation.. i'm a male in mid-twenties, raised secularly, married to an ex-jw woman (on paper still a jw though), who's been raised in the jw religion, although somewhat untheocratically shall i say.

for instance her mother has 5 children with 3 different men, all non-jws, and has had many other relationships as well.

millie210

Greetings to you JHWH,

You say your wife is still a JW but not on paper. Does that mean she is disfellowhipped?

If so, she will have a whole process to go through before they will "allow" her back in.

So that is good for you.

You said that your wife has talked to her mother about her "issues" with the religion.

Can you share what her particular "issues" are?

If so, there will be people here that can give you more ideas to help you.

44

How do you manage to keep JW friendships after you left the organization?

by Bonsai in

jw
friends

it seems incredibly difficult.

those who leave the org.

(or fade) no longer have anything in common with jehovah's witnesses, nor do they want to stick around to get radiated by the fear and guilt that saturates every aspect of a witnesses' life.. i've lost all but one of my jw friends quite simply because i can no longer condone the evil things that they condone.

millie210

The super spiritual ones dont talk to me except to hug me or "counsel me". This includes my extended family sadly.

My less spiritual minded friends are cool with it and dont act any differently.

I own a business and almost all my employees are JW and they are all fine. As a matter of fact I have had two contact me about being hired this week.

I am not Dfd. I just stopped going. So that may be a big part of it.

I fully support them in their JWism, after all I was one my entire life and would still be if I hadnt been exposed to a mess made by elders that I took objection to.

My goal is to reverse witness. I do this by living a happy life and letting them see that leaving doesnt "ruin" life, instead it makes it better.

That is the positive side.

On the other side....

I miss my family. A lot.

I cry over that loss. A little.

What makes me cry a "little" instead of a "lot" is I am channeling it. I have a deep and determined goal to extricate people.

I like what Ray Franz said in his book C of C....this is not who they would be if not for the greater wrong (what they have been trained to think)

I am paraphrasing but you get the idea.

26

Hot topic in congregations: having a beard/goatee

by nevaagain in

jw
friends

i am starting this topic because i was wondering, i see many who leave "the truth" are glad because they can finally have a beard.

is having a beard really a no go in congregations?

how is / was it in your congregation?.

millie210

What a thought out and informative email R. Jerome Harris. Thank you for sharing your view of how young Africans are perceiving things..

I am guessing the Org is busy trying to address that right now. I think they realize where they are growing and where they are not.

I am curious about the picture you posted....it looks familiar but I cant remember which publication it is in? Can you tell me?

Interesting that Adam is shown with his left hand resting against his rib. I guess they didnt want anyone looking for a scar from the taking of Eve?

So much for anyone saying they dont think about what they are saying in their artwork. It is manipulative in its base but they do think about it very carefully!

16

Synthetic Blood in 2 Years? How Will the GB Shoot This Down?

by DarioKehl in

interesting read.

if they already allow "fractions," there's no way they can ban this.. here:www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/nhs-to-give-volunteers-synthetic-blood-made-in-a-laboratory-within-two-years-10343279.html.

millie210

The Liaison Committee in my area has approved the use of the epidural blood patch

which is basically a mini autologous transfusion for women after childbirth. They seem to be creeping further and further in to the technology of what is available.

42

Does this make me a terrible person

by Clambake in

my wife has a friend at her kh.

she is 37 and her friend is 88. i know it sounds kind of strange but they are both the wives of ubm so they kind of stick together.

my wife is very sincere in this friendship and this lady is a nice person.

millie210

steve210 hours agoMillie, I so get where you are coming from. I could not fault your generous capacity for empathizing with and speaking kindly about Clambake's situation.
At the same time, I suspect your kind words were received by Clambake as endorsing his dysregulated sentiments. It is virtually always helpful to get inside someone's shoes and see the world from their view and take a more compassionate view. But.....
Equally, you do not want your empathy to obscure justified concern over a viewpoint that seeks to justify what would amount to abuse of an elderly and vulnerable lady - now there's a lady who deserves your generosity of empathy (and she probably doesn't have a clue what is going through Clambake's mind)!
The urge to empathize needs to be balanced against the need to give a very clear response to Clambake's opening question.

Points well taken Steve.

I guess we will have to hope that all our thoughts have given Clambake a lot to think about. I hope my true answer wasnt missed by anyone.

My answer to clambake is:

Do whatever you would do if she had NO money. (even if it is for your wifes sake)

Dont link your justifiable dislike of JWs to this situation

As for his taking advantage of the older lady - I think his wife is regulating all things there.

7

Church of God pastor writes what could be to some a helpful synopsis of Ray Franz "Crisis of Conscience."

by AndersonsInfo in

jw
friends

http://www.thejournal.org/issues/issue92/crisiscn.html .

a 'crisis of conscience' opens eyes part 1.

he continues on page 346: .

millie210

Thanks for sharing this?

Does anyone know when the article was written?

42

Does this make me a terrible person

by Clambake in

my wife has a friend at her kh.

she is 37 and her friend is 88. i know it sounds kind of strange but they are both the wives of ubm so they kind of stick together.

my wife is very sincere in this friendship and this lady is a nice person.

millie210

DJS
millie,
you can't put lipstick on this part of CB's piggish personality and come away with anything other than a pig. With lipstick.
LOTS of us have been frustrated with life and especially with the Dark Tower and Dark Lords. Lots of us would never ever even consider this type of greedy grab. Your kindness is off base this time. Not everyone who tells you sweet things is your friend, Millie and CB, and not everyone telling you harsh things is your enemy.

That was a pretty nice disagree DJS.

Its been said that tact is the ability to step on someones toes without messing up the shine on their shoes. I think you just did that with me.

I personally love the diversity of opinion and all of you here have helped me so much. Perhaps when its all said and done the folks here will have helped me more than anyone ever. has by getting me through the transition to the real world.

I owe a lot to each of you and to this forum. I remember something Giordano said:

"remember that this is your tribe"

In view of that, what does kindness hurt? It may not help but what does it hurt?

As to your thought about not every one telling you what you dont want to hear being an enemy I couldnt agree with you more. You have that exactly right. Its a good reminder for me. I do tend to be idealistic and you perhaps are more realistic so its good for me to hang around with people like you.

In this case however I dont think what appears on the surface is ALL there is to the story, Clambake is worried about his wife and the upcoming birth of his child, He would be worried as any normal man would except because his wife is a JW, he has extra to worry about. I think he is under the strain of that right now.

He also (reading his words and between the lines a bit) gives a lot of personal time and attention to this older lady. Perhaps her kids or relatives or she herself is taking advantage of him and his wife unwittingly? . How do we know? Our only story is coming from a person who is upset and revealing the details gradually as he goes.

Nevertheless, he is upset and stressed and STILL trying to help this woman.

He needs to separate the money issue out from the rest of it and see what hes got then. Thats the process of making a good decision. You being a realist Im sure you already know that.

If he would still help her if she didnt have a penny, then what does that say about him as a person?

Wait, am I deconstructing this? LOL

42

Does this make me a terrible person

by Clambake in

my wife has a friend at her kh.

she is 37 and her friend is 88. i know it sounds kind of strange but they are both the wives of ubm so they kind of stick together.

my wife is very sincere in this friendship and this lady is a nice person.

millie210

Clambake, I think you are a very good person who is very frustrated.

Sometimes valid frustrations like you mentioned above in your posts can ball up together in our head.

Ask yourself........if this older lady didnt have two sticks to rub together would you still be helping her the way you are?

Would you still drive her to assemblies and clean up after her dog and maybe have her move in someday?

If the answer is yes (even if you are doing it to please your wife) then you are a good person..

I can see why you hate the sorry actions of the JWs at the funeral and most of all why you feel frustrated by the blood card issue!

I think maybe writing everything out here and seeing it in print will help you to cut through the frustration and see everything in categories instead of lumping it all together as "them".

You have very valid reasons to be frustrated. The money isnt the real issue, I see that. Since the money isnt the real issue - dont make it one.

67

My Issue: How To Step Down As A MS Without Getting Noticed

by JW_Rogue in

so that other thread was fun but now i need some help with something.

i was born in the truth most of my family is in.

although they aren't outwardly super spiritual i doubt any of them would ever leave.

millie210

Can you get a job that will demand your time?

Financial issues and monetary concerns are things people universally understand.

Maybe it could work hand in hand with the "anxiety" Cappy mentioned?