I loved your title and first post TMS.
One trap I think it is easy to fall in to is "if not for this, than I could have/would have______ " (fill in blank with an idealized situation).
The fact is, the world is full of people who never reach their potential, get that degree, make their first million, travel the world etc.
One of the things I have said to myself is who is to say that I would have done XYZ if only I was not a withess?
I have many worldly family members who are living the average life. Religion didnt stunt them, they just are where they are.
It really helps me not to feel bitter about the wasted years as a JW.
I also learned a solid skill set as to how to talk to anyone about anything and I know more about ancient Jewish history than I suspect I will ever need! LOL
So I embrace where I came from and what I can carry forward now that I have left the JWs behind (which is my end goal....leave them far and permanently behind) I have met many wonderful, sincere people and carry those memories with me also.
I remember reading a fascinating paper on the process of intuition that talked about how people who had grown up on the streets of Calcutta tested amazingly high in intuitive skills. The conclusion was that living in a state of adversity had helped them hone intuitive skills as a matter of successful survival.
Not everyones situation is that dire but it illustrates the fact that good (or shall we say useful?) can come from bad.
I am in a long slow fade in part because I have a business that employs some JWs and neither they nor I want to damage what we see as a good thing we have going employer/employee wise.
That gives me even more reason to adopt a philosophical mindset that embodies grace and gentle, humorous acceptance of all that has gone before.
I am not quite there but I will be, because that is my goal.