my dreams are filled as a rule with animals...
Swan - Kiss :( poor baby... :(
here is my most recent dream I posted about on my blog... it was the most wild dream I think I have ever had
I had the most unusual dream last night. I dreamed I was in a car with somebody… my ex husband… and he was driving, but it was my car. There we were, driving in the rain in a glittery blue Dodge Neon, with a scratch on it. He almost ran somebody over, 2 times, on purpose. Then, he laughed about it. I was so upset, I demanded to drive. Suddenly, my car wasn’t a car anymore. It was a truck and I was in the driver’s seat. He kept laughing about trying to run that person over, so I opened the passenger side door and threw them out of the car, I could almost feel his body hit the hard pavement. Thud.
I said to myself “Amanda… you should have never thrown that person out of the car.” I was now driving in through the Appalachian Mountains, the roads that wind up sides of tremendous mountains, going around the sharpest of sharp spirals. It was raining outside and the curves kept getting sharper and sharper and the road more slick. My inner voice kept telling me to slow down, to drive more careful, but I wouldn’t listen. I could see it, the edge of the road where the bottom of that mountain was so far down you don't dare look over the edge. I began to panic inside, but I drove faster and harder and nothing was going to stop me, because something was driving me on, pushing me.
Then, it happened. I took a curve too sharp… that moment right before a car accident… when you know you are about to crash… but there were no guard rails. Nothing to crash into. I saw my right front tire start to slip over the edge as the truck began to slide... and then I was sideways... falling softly... weightless. It didn't shock me, did not come as a surprise. It was how things were supposed to be. I looked down at the world below… the rocks and the green things, the painted autumn leaves and the trees. And my car began to gracefully… softly… slide and slip down the side of that mountain. And I heard my own voice speak into my ears with almost loudly, yet so soft, so soothing, so peaceful…
“Amanda, you are going to die.”
I wasn’t scared. I wasn’t frightened. I felt something else. Peace.
And then I woke up with a jolt and wrote it all down. I will never forget this dream. The picture of my car so gracefully sliding down those rocks, or the beauty of my own soft voice in my ears telling me I am going to die. And the lack of fear of it all. More like, thank god it is finally over, THIS is what I have been waiting for. It was the most calm feeling I can recall, true inner peace. It was the single most peaceful feeling I think I have ever felt, totally void of any fear. So strange.