So after all this I finally told her.
I asked if she had ever had a visit from the CO? She said no and I could tell she was kind of nervous about the whole thing.
Anyway, as it turns out, we are busy on the day in question.
I think she was actually relieved that we are indisposed on that day.
I haven't texted the elder back yet. Waiting as long as possible so all available time slots are filled so he can't try to reschedule :-)
Gonna say something to the effect, "thanks for the thought but we are busy on ___day. Hope you are well."