I am hurt however, that you have posted, that you view your service, that you believed was to God, with disrespect.
I don't view my service with disrespect. I view it occasionally with regret.
But I can't dwell on it. If I hadn't gone to Bethel, I wouldn't have gotten a view of the organization from that perspective, and my life today could be totally different.
Because of Bethel, I got homesick, then depressed, then angry that I didn't accomplish what I set out to do. (I wanted to stay for 3 years...ended up leaving after 1.) I came home, dejected, discouraged. I saw the hypocrisy among many (not all, mind you) while I was at Bethel. Left a bad taste in my mouth.
Got over it eventually. Moved to a new town. Met my wife.
I think it's very possible that I would still be a true believer if I hadn't gone to Bethel. So, in that respect, I very much am glad that I had the Bethel experience.