BU2B... don't let it get to you so much!! Chill!!
I'm in a similar boat to you, elder hubby, MS/pioneer son (still at home). You have to let her know how you feel without letting all that negativity come out. Reach her natural persona, appeal to it. Even the most hardedned JW has a natural side! I have my mum to stay sometimes and she's full on, I change the subject to lots of other things, it can be done as long as you don't let the JW stuff get to you.
I know at the assembly is a bad time, we've just had our RC but take a deep breath, get through it and when it's over just put it behind you. Meetings too much? Don't go. FS too much? Don't go. Do something fun instead, let your wife see you having fun instead of drinking yourself into oblivion.
You can get through it! Like me and many others are having to!
Piztjw.. thanks for the summary. LOL!