Posts by tornapart

101

My mom passed away yesterday....

by minimus in

jw
friends

thank you all for your sincere encouragement during these last few weeks.

finally, she is at peace.

i was with her , holding her hand when she died.

tornapart

So very very sorry Min... it's terrible losing your mother, especially when you've been close. There's no words at the moment that can take away the pain and the loss you're feeling right now but just to say you'll be in my thoughts. I know the loss and emptiness and heartache that comes, it's as though your whole world has turned on it's axis. It's hard coming to terms with and some days will be better than others. Don't be afraid to go along with any emotions you feel.. anger, depression, guilt (sometimes when you feel like laughing and feel you shouldn't). We all deal with the death of our loved ones differently, no way is wrong or right. Sending you a big big hug

27

This is for all JW's out there...

by Divergent in

jw
friends

.

sorry to be so blunt, but you only have yourself to blame if you realize something is wrong but allow your cognitive dissonance to kick in.

if you are confronted with facts which are reported by reliable sources which are hard to dispute and deny, and you choose to dismiss these as "apostate lies" rather than looking at these from an objective point of view, it's your fault and you deserve the consequences of willful ignorance!.

tornapart

Dubstepped:- Couldn't the OP just as easily read:

To all the battered wives out there, if you allow your weak azz to stay in a marriage with a spouse that beats the crap out of you, you get what you deserve. It's your choice to stay so you deserve the consequences of your pathetic choices.

Victim blaming is sooooo cool. Compassion is so overrated. Smdh

I've just this morning finished reading a book about a woman in an abusive marriage and found it eye opening. The way someone can be totally trapped and be unable to see any way out. The similarities between being trapped in a cult and trapped in an emotionally abusive relationship were so easy to see. Even though we are not physically abused as in this woman's case, the emotional abuse and control, leading to a person's complete domination is all the same. You end up believing everything you are told by the abuser and have no way of escaping. Your post is spot on dubstepped.

65

Introducing...ME

by Heartsafire in

jw
friends

long time lurker here.

i'm a fifth gen born-in baptized jw.

to say i've been struggling with doubts is an understatement.

tornapart

hello Heartsafire, there are lots of us here who are treading on eggshells with our spouses. I've been fading for years now, my husband is an elder and although I can talk to him about doctrinal things, show him what's in the bible and compare it to what is taught, it's much harder to talk about scandals etc. So I try and take it very slow, drop a seed every now and then. It's very hard but he's now used to me not going to meetings or out on FS anymore (except for an odd meeting). I'm hoping one day something will happen to lift the blinkers but I'm not holding my breath. One of the best things I've found is to say that God gave us a free will, that it's a precious gift and he wouldn't want us to be forced into things that we weren't happy about. Saying that I feel uncomfortable with the way things are going and feel much happier reading my bible by myself and will stay close to God that way.He respects that and leaves me to it. Sometimes he tries to push my buttons but I usually manage to resist. LOL We find it works for us.

Hope you can find your own way to get through this. Remember, patience is everything if you want to make your marriage survive this!

225

Cult or Religion

by Richard C B in

what is a cult and what is a religion?

its open to debate.

who has the authority to say for certain what is a cult and what is a religion?

tornapart

Richard C B :- 4. Can you identify the true religion?

Which religion bases all its teachings on God’s Word, honors God’s name, and proclaims God’s Kingdom as mankind’s only hope? Which group practices love and shuns war? What do you think?

this is telling... cults always think they are special.

225

Cult or Religion

by Richard C B in

what is a cult and what is a religion?

its open to debate.

who has the authority to say for certain what is a cult and what is a religion?

tornapart

freemindfade:- If you want to find out if your religion is a High Control cult or not, find out what it takes to leave

Amen!!

I have been trying to leave for 4 years. It's impossible. I can only 'fade'. If I leave... ie. state that I no longer want to be a JW, any friends I ever had from my childhood onward would be a thing of the past. Family members would disown me, or at least keep their distance. The only way I can do it is by taking my time until I'm almost unnoticed. (almost impossible when my husband is an elder). I am having to keep elders and others at arm's length so they don't discover the real reason,,,,,So please tell me it isn't a cult???!!

225

Cult or Religion

by Richard C B in

what is a cult and what is a religion?

its open to debate.

who has the authority to say for certain what is a cult and what is a religion?

tornapart

Sorry I've only read half this thread but felt I needed to say this. The reasons I believe it is a cult.

The GB are a small group of men who claim to be God's spokesperson (the Faithful and Discreet Slave) that is ALWAYS being referred to in their literature. If anyone speaks against them they can be disfellowshipped which means they can have no contact with their family whatsoever. A person is looked down on, 'marked', if they don't preach, don't go to all the meetings or other such things. A woman can't wear trousers to a meeting or out in the 'minisrty', a man cannot have a beard (if he does he's looked down on). A person cannot celebrate any holiday, or else they are disfellowshipped. Any sexual indiscretion is brought before three elders who have to go into every tiny detail, if a person is deemed unrepentant, they are disfellowshipped. You cannot smoke, take drugs, get drunk, etc.. if you do are brought before the 3 elders, who can disfellowship you. You cannot openly disagree with ANY of their teachings, or you can be disfellowshipped. If you behave in a way that is deemed 'spiritually weak' you will be marked. If you are disfellowshipped, you will be shunned. Obeying the 'Organisation' is tantamount to obeying God. There is no freedom... to think, behave or talk about.. everything you say, think or do is controlled. if you try and get away it's almost impossible.... your family is held to ransom.

There are many other reasons but these are off the top of my head. Is it a religion... yes... but in my mind it's also a cult.

8

Regarding changes and my poor mother!

by username in

well i just got off the phone with mother (thankfully she has no part in the shunning policy) and she thinks the changes are "marverless" this i would imagine is the general consensus of most hardcore rank and file!

she is even investing in a roku device so she can watch more indoctrination programming.

to be honest i wouldn't even try make her think, because she has far to much invested in the cult.

tornapart

I totally agree. I tried it with my elderly mother when I first discovered TTATT and it didn't work. I suppose I expected her to at least give it some thought, but no, it just upset her. I didn't try again and if ever she brought it up I just said it was best we didn't discuss it again as I didn't want to upset her.

My best friend is recently starting to awaken but it has taken some personal issues for it to happen. She told me that she couldn't understand where I was coming from when I first told her how I felt. Now certain things have happened to her she says she understands me now. I really think this is it, it takes something to happen to each individual, a seed may be dropped in their mind that starts to grow when they actually see it for themselves.

16

Speculation on future donation arrangements

by respectful_observer in

in the aftermath of this year's annual meeting and the recent tremors of cash shortfalls within the organization, i began thinking "what could they do next to bring in more $$$.".

many here have speculated that we're seeing incremental moves toward "tithing" (of course they would never call it that).

a recent thread (can't find it right now) highlighted that they recently raised the "suggested per publisher donation" at the circuit assembly significantly (tripled it?)..

tornapart

There'll probably be some guilt tripping involved... 'Brothers, even though we have made our pledges anonymously, Jehovah knows. We have made our pledges to Jehovah and if are not fulfilling our vow to Jehovah then he will see it'.... (or words to that effect put in Borg-speak).

37

This morning's magazine trolley encounter..

by GodZoo in

was just out shopping and came across two middle aged female witnesses with their magazine trolley..

i approached them and they were all glee and smiles and ready to hand me a couple of magazines.

one moment ladies i have just a couple of questions..

tornapart

Yes, I do know what you mean. When I first learnt TTATT I offloaded onto my mother. She just wasn't really ready for it.probably never would have been. Now she's gone and all I remember is the hurt she felt for me, thinking I was going to lose my eternal life! I meant no malice toward her, I just wanted her know what a corrupt, hypocritical and poisonous religion it was but to her it was her life. I try and be very careful now about 'bursting their bubble'. For some people it works but I've come to realise the ones it happens to are those who are ready and open for it or who have something happen to them that makes them ready for it.

Maybe those ladies will go back and think about what you said with open minds. I really hope they do.

37

This morning's magazine trolley encounter..

by GodZoo in

was just out shopping and came across two middle aged female witnesses with their magazine trolley..

i approached them and they were all glee and smiles and ready to hand me a couple of magazines.

one moment ladies i have just a couple of questions..

tornapart

You know what.... I actually feel sad for those two ladies. You felt good... but maybe those two ladies went home feeling really depressed.

I know what it felt like learning TTATT. 4 years on and I'm still struggling with it.

If I offloaded all that on two JWs.... maybe two genuinely lovely kind people... I couldn't feel happy about it.

Sorry but I don't like this post.