I am assuming that my shunning experience is nothing compared to what you guys have experienced when you got disfellowshipped. I have much respect for you. I'd never be able to go through the reinstatement process. Yuck.
Esmeralda001
JoinedPosts by Esmeralda001
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32
Conclusion
by Esmeralda001 ini decided to put an end to my affiliation with the jws for good.
this decision is not the result of an irrational impulse.
it is quite the contrary.
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Conclusion
by Esmeralda001 ini decided to put an end to my affiliation with the jws for good.
this decision is not the result of an irrational impulse.
it is quite the contrary.
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Esmeralda001
Thanks everyone for the support.
@LHG
yes i meant it! I've spent hours overanalyzing my situation only to find out that there is no way I can grow in this hostile environnement. Even if I get baptized, even if I become a pioneer. No matter what I do, these people will aleay find a flaws to point out. I'm leaving not because of my experience with the elderette. What pushed me towards the exit door is the other members lack of reaction. They turned a blind eye on that and expected me to do the same. I wonder How my study conductor feels about iT? Aren't God's people united by love? If the jws are God's only represents, why is there so much bullying at the KH? The hatred is real among the JW, believe me.
@khaleesi.
Shunning people is the elderettes' favourite game. Marking people and avoiding them ois a funny game until you get a dose of your own medecine. Sadly these women won't completely understand the harmful effects of shunning until one of their own children get excommunicated.
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Conclusion
by Esmeralda001 ini decided to put an end to my affiliation with the jws for good.
this decision is not the result of an irrational impulse.
it is quite the contrary.
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Esmeralda001
My father is anti-jws. the "brothers" and "sisters" know better than to knock on my door! Trust me. -
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Conclusion
by Esmeralda001 ini decided to put an end to my affiliation with the jws for good.
this decision is not the result of an irrational impulse.
it is quite the contrary.
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Esmeralda001
I decided to put an end to my affiliation with the JWs for good. This decision is not the result of an irrational impulse. It is quite the contrary. I could have (and should have) left earlier, but didn't because I was still observing. Now that I have enough data to draw a solid conclusion, I can leave with no guilt.Update on the past weeks:I had found a way to be at peace despite my bullies many attacks. I shunned completely (no interactions, not even a glance) the people who were showing hostility towards me in one way or another. This includes the Presiding elder's family and two bitter middle aged single sisters (very good friends with the Presiding elder's wife). At that point everything was doing fine. I even starting to fit in (even though this was not what I was aiming). But then It had been brought to my attention that my attitude towards the sisters mentioned above needed to be corrected. I simply disregarded the conceal and continued to shun the authors of the complaint . So I continued to greet the people who were nice to me and snubbed the ones who marked me.The last attack:One last bullet had been trown at my face. It was my shunners final attack, and it was directed by the presiding elderette. She managed to put (not all, but most of) the sisters against me. The sisters who had nothing against me initially suddenly became very distance with me. Don't ask me what she told them. I don't have a clue. Dispite my disappointment, I went with the flow and respected the sisters wish to minimize interaction with me. It didn't bothered me too much because I had one friend left (let's call her Maria). Beside she was only three years yonger than me. I felt like MAria was the only one I could relate to in my congregation because she was young and unbaptized. I went along very well with her, and her parents ,who are rather liberal, seemed to appreciate me very well. At the end of each meeting, Maria and I would spent at least 30 min cheat-chatting. The fact that I had a friend with Who I could hang-out with must had bothered the presiding elderette very much because she had found a way to put an end to my friendship with Maria. One particular day I caught her staring at me while I was laughing at Maria's joke. I didn't know for how long she had be staring. All I could see was the anger in her eyes!! If a glare could kill, I would not be able to tell my story today. At that very moment I knew something was going to happen. The next meeting Maria didn't hangout with me at the biggening/end of the meeting. She stopped doing so ever since. I don't resent her for that though. Somebody must had told her mother something about me. Maria's parents would still be nice with me, they just wouldn't let their daughter hanging out with me. That final attack hurt, but I decided to keep searching for something godly in this congregation. I attended a few more meetings, and then decided to leave. In the middle of the song, I went to the restroom, tough to myself that this environment was unhealthy, went back to the hall, packed my stuff, told my study conductor that I had an emergency, and left for Good.I'm done with this! For the bible studies who read this post, your experience with the jws, unlike mine, can be a good one if you are friends with the good people. I wish you good luck on your journey. XoX. -
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Are JW's allowed to have close non JW friends?
by 007DB1 ini am a non-participating christian who is fully respectful of but never had anything to do with jw.. i have a jw friend who seems to closely follow his jw belief's.
i have met most of his family and friends who all are also jw's.
he says i am his only non-jw good friend.. he is getting married this year to his long time gf and with our recent growing more guarded and distant friendship, i am wondering what is going on?.
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Esmeralda001
@Toesup
"if someone sees you hanging out with them..."
How they can be 100% sure that tha person you are hanging out with is a non-believer"?
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Double life
by Esmeralda001 inis there a way i can successfully live a double life?
don't get me wrong, i'm not trying to get engaged in activities that are condemnable according to the *bible* (not the *wt*) standards.
i figured that the only way i can get the brothers and sisters to leave me along is by pretending that i am an unemployed drop out.
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Esmeralda001
Greetings,
Is there a way I can successfully live a double life? Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to get engaged in activities that are condemnable according to the *BIBLE* (not the *WT*) standards. I figured that the only way I can get the brothers and sisters to leave me along is by pretending that I am an unemployed drop out. It seems that being discrete about my education isn't enough. There is an unspoken, yet very obvious, expectation from me to change my current situation. The fact is that I have no intension of quitting my job/giving up on my studies. Do you think that faking to be "miserable" (for a lack of better word) is a good strategy? I'm positive that my study conductor gives an update to the nosy sisters of our congregation every other week.
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Esmeralda001
My fb profil is private anyway. -
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Esmeralda001
@gentledawn
After you got baptized.
My study conductor assured me that I wouldn't never have to abandon my parents as they are the ones who brought me on this earth.
@Londo111
I'll take your suggestion in consideration. Thank you for your advice. It is very much appreciated.
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What did being a JW teach you?
by punkofnice inthese are some of the things the wbt$ 'taught' me:.
dishonesty is fine if it's to trick people into joining the cult.. if your spouse stops believeing, the best thing you can do is break up the family.. the laws of the governing body overrule any other laws...or else!.
my friends are conditional.. avoid loving people, they'll only let you down or get df'd.. unintelligent dumbos are better than intelligent ones if the dumbos are elders or above.. hate is better than love.. i am not good enough and god will probably enjoy killing me.. demons will appear in my room at night.. ignore practicallity if being practical or loving prevents the leaders getting money or praise.. god hates.
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Esmeralda001
I've learnt to:
•Not trust people
•Be overly suspicious
•Watch my mouth
•Be paranoid
•Overthink (I cannot buy a bottle of red or black nail polish without worrying about wheter or not i'm breaking some unwritten rule)
•Be more tolerant
•Be thick-skinned
•Fear man
•Appreciate my own compagny
•Be consistant with my goals
•Be grateful for my freedom
•Draw close to Jehovah
•Turn a blind eye on people's flaws
•Be more fogiving
•Control my attitude
•Be more understanding
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Esmeralda001
@Gentledawn
What a creep!!! Were you suspected of wrongdoing?