Posts by Heartsafire

49

JW Wife not listening

by rathernotsay in

jw
friends

hey guys, looking for some advice with what to do with my jw wife that is simply ignoring my wishes/demands.

first a little back story, we have been married for 6 years and have 3 children together.

she is a jw, and i am not (nor do i have any religious beliefs).

Hi there. Since you have the elder's number, feel free to contact him and let him know what is going on. Explain your situation exactly as you described it on the forum--that you aren't against her activities, but it is too great a hardship on your family to have your wife pioneer, and you can also explain the disrespectful behavior she has been displaying towards you. If he has been helpful to you in the past, he may ask her to step down from pioneering, or possibly do a smaller amount of preaching work. He also may counsel her on her disrespect of you. Normally going this route isn't helpful, but in your case, you need to fight fire with fire.

Someone suggested professional counseling and I say go for it--if you can drag her into there. Good luck.

34

Finally ready to join the crowd.

by Silent Knight in

jw
friends

hello, all you damn dirty apostates!

please, allow me to join this community of diseased minds.

i have been lurking here for over 2 years and tonight i decided it's time to come out of the shadows.

Heartsafire

Greetings Silent Night!

I was you a few years back with the doubts, anxiety, and lurking. Now, I'm in a nice fade, although I cannot completely break away due to my husband and family still being JWs. But...nobody's perfect. LoL.

So glad youve gotten out and overcome your depression. It's amazing how toxic the JW environment is. All I can say is welcome to the forum and congrats on taking back your life!

23

How Do You Get Most of Your News?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i read that many people get their news from facebook.

i look online mostly at fox news and the drudge report.

very seldom do i look at cnn.😎.

Heartsafire

I get most of my news from seven fat men in New York.

Haha. Jk

30

Bret Weinstein: Evergreen State College Racism Controversy

by Simon in

great discussion, well worth watching.

covers racism, the bubble that some people live in vs the reality that resulted in trumps election and more (and jws get a mention too).. the rubin report (and many of the guests he has on) repeatedly knock it out of the park with sensible, calm and important analysis and commentary on important issues to our society.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-feapcgxnyy.

Heartsafire

Gotta love the Rubin Report. Dave Rubin's interviews have totally made a difference for me on so many levels. This madness going on at Evergreen is, from what can see, just the tip of the iceberg in a fascist, terroristic movement know as the far left. This country needs to clean out the viral, systemic ideologies ripping itself apart internally. It starts with the youth.

27

Day 1: The Night of Anger, Tears, and Pain

by Saethydd in

my freedom came with a heavy cost.

i couldn't stand the dishonesty so when my sister went out of town on a trip i told my parents that i no longer wanted to be a jw.

when my sister got back and i told her she was so angry, said she really wanted to slap me, then she ran off sobbing, a few minutes later she deposited every gift i ever gave her in front of my door.. my entire family has turned against me.

Heartsafire

Saethydd,

So happy to hear you are in a place of freedom and acceptance.

You've carefully thought out your exit and planned accordingly knowing that your family would react the way they did. You also respected your family in choosing to reveal to them the truth of your beliefs rather than lie to them any further.

What you did took guts, and my hat is off to you. It takes brave ones like you to take a stand and break the cycle of this cult.

It is unfortunate that your family could not accept your beliefs, and they toed the line in reacting to your honesty. Their beliefs are being challenged right now, and they are in great pain with conflicting feelings...not caused by you but caused by the indoctrination you so deservedly denounce. But, who knows what the future holds? This could be the start of something good for them all.

Welcome to true freedom! Your future is yours to make and the possibilities are limitless.

38

Talk to my Dad about beards.

by LovingLifeNow in

jw
friends

so i spoke to my elder dad the other day, and he asked if i still am sporting a beard.

i said yes, then i said, "i thought the society said its ok to have a neat trimmed beard now?

" he said "no, no, no..if you read the article , it says in countries where it is accepted" so my response was "ummm, its pretty accepted here in america"..which he says "it reflects your spirituality" "if another wittness saw you, they would know you are weak"...i was like, "ok, i don't get it, and i follow christ/god, not men..." then he said in his hall" if a brother came in with a beard , he would not have privelages" then i just gave up, and tried to change the subject..ugggggggggg if these people would just listen to themselves , they would see the sillyness of there teachings...

Heartsafire

@the rebel

Don't know if you were being serious. Couldn't help laughing. Btw...I pick C because a man confident in himself despite his flaws is attractive.

I happen to think a clean, trimmed beard is sexy, but not as a compensation for baldness. A man who embraces his baldness is attractive and frankly rather sexy IMO.

As for a man with a wig, I just feel sorry for the guy. But, no offense, please, to any gent who wears one.

36

How ballroom dancing helped our exit

by Finally Left in

just wanted to say hello and thank you for all of your comments.

when i finally figured out this was not the truth it was nice to know i wasn't the only one - it was a surprise to learn how many there are.

february was my last month of service after 43 active years.

Heartsafire

Wow! Marvelous story! Love that you bonded over dancing and it led to your freedom. If I wasn't such an Elaine from Seinfeld at dancing I might sign my hunny and I up for lessons. Congrats to you both.

27

If a person is transgender and gets saved what will they go to heaven as?

by Nikorasu95 in

jw
friends

i know this is a stupid question because the answer is obvious, but if a person was born a male and gets transgender surgery to turn into female will that person go to heaven as a male or female if they died saved?

i think they will go to heaven with the gender they were born with.

Heartsafire

As a unicorn of course.

7

Bored Teenagers?

by compound complex in

we loved connie when we were kids, back in the '50s.

still do, for that matter!.

watch the kids in the audience.

Heartsafire

That was a real treat to see and hear. I've never heard of her before seeing this, but this was before my time. I love the expressions of the kids in the audience, and I so love the styles and hair from the 50's and early 60's. Things seemed so much simpler and fun.

23

What Kind Of Psychological Conseling Do You Think Jehovah's Witnesses Need When They Find Out It's Not The Truth?

by Brokeback Watchtower in

i personally would like to see they get the very best but haven't a clue how to do it what are your benevolent words of wisdom, should a person do a deep research on his own a kind of self medication or should they brush up on some psychology,, who should they trust because after you leave you got big trust issues.. i don't know about you but to me it was a real shocker, i was totally into getting their worthless bull shit out of my head.

i choose the self medicate path and did as must research as time would allow,, science was a biggie for me, it was enjoyable learning to get so much bull shit out of my head..

Heartsafire

For a time I saw a therapist who had worked with victims of domestic abuse and also people of mob/gang families. I was told my case most closely resembled one in dealing with a mob family. Good therapists are out there, and sometimes it just helps to be heard by a professional.

Although, nothing beats a good vent here on the forum where almost everyone knows exactly what you're dealing with. I don't even have to explain the cult-speak, and it's a helluva lot cheaper!