Posts by mentalclarity

50

Jehovah's people are not happy people

by Phoebe in

jw
friends

i finally stopped attending the meetings about 4 months go.

i won't be going back - ever.. but i've decided the best reply to the watchtower is to be happy and i do try to be happy every day even thought i wasted my entire life on this religion.

i cherish every day, practice mindfulness and do my best to be content with the life i have.. it is only now that i see that most jws i know are deeply unhappy people.

mentalclarity

This was one of the things that woke me up. I kept on hearing how happy everyone was to be in the organization but when I looked around in my congregation all I saw was a bunch of depressed, neurotic people. Some reasons:

You're always being watched and judged- you're never doing enough
You're purposefully looking at all the bad things to prove we're living in the last days. Negative mindset
You're told to endure and pray in difficult situations (bad relationships/bad job situation/etc) so you're probably putting up with alot of stuff you could actually be doing something about
You are suppressing constantly anything that you see that is not in line with the JW narrative. For example when you see an elder who is a crazy dictator yet is supposed to be shepherding the flock with love.

That all takes its toll on a person's psyche.

26

What happened in 1995?

by pale.emperor in

i was born in 1984 so was only 9yo in 1995. i read on various posts on here and on other websites about false expectations about 1975 and 1995. i'm aware of the 1975 failure but what was said in 1995?.

mentalclarity

So as a "born-in" I'd always heard that "this generation" will not pass without seeing the end, so we figured even someone who was born in 1914 itself was getting pretty old and "the end" was super super close- ( I mean what's the average lifespan of a person, right?) Then this article comes out. It was slipped in so subtly that i really didn't even realize this huge change until people were talking about it afterwards. It's so ridiculous.....

13

A Poll Regarding Shunning

by pale.emperor in

i've created a poll here: https://goo.gl/7xburo.

i'd be interested in seeing the results.. .

#qp_main1119848 .qp_btna:hover input {background:#00355f!important} #qp_all1119848 {max-width:815px; margin:0 auto;}if watchtower scrapped the shunning policy due to "new light" and your family suddenly agreed to speak to you again would you accept them back?.

mentalclarity

I voted yes. My family is following rules - they are too indoctrinated to know any better.

I've always wanted a relationship with them - I don't see it as condoning their behavior to have a relationship with them if the WT rules change. I would welcome them with open arms- their not having a relationship with me has always been about them- not me.

Why give them a taste of their own medicine? We aren't "in" anymore and we know better. IMHO. It's not tit for tat.

12

Worse than the maggots apparently...

by NoviceLocs14 in

so after a couple of years, i've finally re-established contact with a close relative (not revealing too much for privacy reasons).

it turns out that he is dfd (for the typical jw reasons, of course).

we caught up about a lot of things, including family.

mentalclarity

Yeah I've had that happen to me too. My ex and I are both out for many years but many active witnesses are still in contact with him because they figured he left because he was morally "weak". In other words, he still believes, but he can't live up to the standards,

I, on the other hand, am not considered morally weak - but I'm considered the WORST because I don't believe it's the "truth". I've gotten emails about how horrible I am and the cold shoulder from almost all my old jw friends and a few of my family.

We are more of a threat obviously to their bubble. Any criticism of the organization puts the blame on them. Moral weakness places the blame on you.

510

What Music have you Been Listening to this Last Year ? Post You tubes if you Like !

by flipper in

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wktxjuyiat4.

.

mentalclarity

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKmPci5VXz0

32

After being in the so-called "Truth" makes me despise all religions.

by Fader812 in

after being a jw made me lose trust in religion, from the lies, hypocrisy and greed of this organization made me lose faith completely.

what does one do after this mind f$%@, what is there to look forward to?

do i make up my own agnostic theory in head and hope for the best?

mentalclarity

So you know how you might have had a bad experience with a man and then you think all men are shit???? It just reminds me a lot of with what happens with exjws and religion. It's a process-a lot of exjw swing to the other extreme. I was very anti-organized religion when I first left, then I softened my stance.

I work with Catholics, Baptists. Methodists, Buddhist leaning, etc people and some go to church/some don't. I see their lives as pretty balanced and they are decent, honest individuals trying to raise their kids and do the best they can. What matters is that you do what works for you. Take a break- don't do anything and little by little see if something peaks your interest. You'll find your own compass. The way you feel right now about religion may change or it might not. But at least it won't be just a knee jerk reaction to being a JW.

23

Did a current or ex-JW help you to awaken?

by TweetieBird in

jw
friends

was there something that was said to you that got the wheel turning in your brain, that caused you to start waking up to ttatt, either by a jw or ex-jw that you didn't know was awake?

i'm trying to think of things i can say or ask of my current family members still in that may help them to start seeing the real truth about the organization.

they think we're still in..

mentalclarity

While I was still in, I heard of some exjws who had become "apostate". I would never have talked to them or listened to anything they said. My guard would have been up.

My waking up had to do more with questions that a non-jw at work started to ask and I found myself struggling to make our beliefs sound logical.

I think there are different things that awaken each of us. With some, it's seeing things crumble from the inside. With others it's exposure to nice non-jws. For some, they looked up stuff online and I really doubt someone sitting you down and trying to "reason" with them about JWs is going to help them wake up. You have to already kind of be going down that road and open to doubting the "truth". I don't really try even bringing up JW stuff when I'm with the family...but, I make myself approachable (non-confrontational/loving) and lead a happy life so that if ever someone wants to come up and ask me questions..or a place to stay or whatever- they know I'll be there for them. I don't want to be that crazy exjw that they'll automatically dismiss because I'm always trying to prove them wrong.

12

Recovery From The Jehovah's Witnesses - A Guide

by pale.emperor in

hey guys.

a friend online asked me about my recovery and how i managed to recover relatively easily from watchtower indoctrination.

although i think a major part of it is acquainting oneself with information about the watchtower and it's history, a lot of it (for me at least) was an inner game.

mentalclarity

This was a really good read - your friend is lucky to have you for support.

"You’ll be tremendously loyal and loving to those you really care about"...

This is so true. For every family member or friend I've lost because of them following these silly rules, I've gained someone new who loves and supports me unconditionally. I can't tell you how much I value them because of my JW upbringing. I might have taken it for granted had I not had that experience.

81

Gerrit Losch Claims JW's Attending College Are Spiritually Weak

by pale.emperor in

https://www.facebook.com/jw.0027/videos/799049613609936/.

the video was posted directly to a pro-jw facebook page.

i cant believe what i'm hearing... actually, nothing surprises be about this cult anymore.. didn't they say to the judge in the arc that they dont discourage college?.

mentalclarity

I've been out for quite a while but as far as i can tell from my uber JW family this is a conscience matter and the younger generation of relatives I have have all either been to college or technical school. I'm not saying they are sending kids to live in dorms at top Universities but definitely there is more openness to sending kids to college in general. In some countries you really can't get a job without a professional degree and I don't think that was the case 20 years ago. Maybe there's a difference from country to country on this issue. I tend to see alot of difference even from one congregation to another.

44

Why Do People Become JWs?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i was born in the religion but why on earth do people join this religion?

?.

mentalclarity

I think people who become witnesses are looking for something outside mainstream religions that provides them with answers. JWs seem to do that superficially. There is also the lure of being part of a group and there are alot of nice JWs out there. At first glance, it seems like a nice bunch - it's not until you've been in a while that you start seeing all the major flaws.

New converts are usually vulnerable also in some way- in alot of cases I can think of- people have been ignored or feel isolated and here comes a group of JWs paying alot of attention to them and being super nice. Of course that's going to make an impression. And people might start feeling this false sense of "I know something that others do not" like you've discovered something that everyone else couldn't decipher, but here you are diligently studying the Bible and you're surrounded by a group of people who feel the exact same way. That's powerful stuff. You're all in this together- you suddenly have a purpose (preach!) and you know exactly what's going to happen in the future. Sadly, the euphoria doesn't last long....