mentalclarity

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Posts by mentalclarity

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  4

  Interview With an Apostate: Snugglebunny

  by snugglebunny in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i told my entire witnessy life story a few months ago here: snugglebunny's witnessy story.

  it's split into several sections with comments in between..

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  mentalclarity

  That was a great read. I love a happy ending
  
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  49

  Motherly Love, that "Unbreakable Bond"

  by Simon in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  my father died a couple of months ago.

  he'd been ill for some time and had many health scares and heart troubles over the years but always managed to keep on going.

  then one time he didn't.. i'm glad i got to know him again and spend some more time with him after so many years missed because of the wts but those years will always be lost forever.

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  mentalclarity

  Sorry for your loss-glad you were able to reconnect a bit before at least.

  I could never understand that type of behavior towards your own child, especially as a mother myself. It's pretty over the top too - the force must be strong with her.

  Living far away from the craziness is definitely a gift.
  
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  interview with an apostate- morpheus

  by _Morpheus in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  when i saw simons thread and the "interview" series of threads that came from it i really enjoyed reading the life stories of those that shared.

  a bump for newer people seems like a good idea and i figured i would add mine as well.

  again, thanks to simon for the concept of a guided interview thread and the template.. tell us a little about yourself and your family.. hmmm... easy question, hard answer.

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  mentalclarity

  Thanks for taking the time to write all that. I love the honesty on this forum. Beats the usual JW bullshit.
  
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  Interview with Dagney

  by Dagney in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  tell us a little about yourself and your family.. i was born and raised in southern california, with a brief stint with parents as need-greaters in central america.

  my parents accepted a study in the d2d work, i believe my father was interested in the revolutionary aspect of the religion, and my mom said she wanted to learn the bible.

  they were baptized in 1937 i think, and attended the one and only los angeles kh at the time.

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  mentalclarity

  Really great to read this. Had a very similar experience at my last meeting- I just knew that I didn't belong and that was that. Thanks for putting that all out in writing.
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  226

  Wealth, Poverty, and Morality

  by SecondRateMind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am interested in the approach this forum takes to money.

  apart from sex, (which i am quite relaxed about) it seems to me that wealth is the surest divider between those who are moral, and those who are not.. it seems jesus thought so, also.

  luke 16:19-31 kjv describes well enough his dusty attitude to the rich who do not succour the poor.. and this world has many poor: so many, it might seem that we can do nothing about it, and twist his words; 'the poor ye shall have always with you, but me, ye shall not have always.

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  mentalclarity

  My biggest contention with the OP is the idea that redistribution of wealth will help the poor. I lived through the aftermath of an agrarian reform which consisted of taking lands from the wealthy and distributing lots equally to the poor in a Latin American country. Unfortunately the poor did not possess the skill set or tools necessary to profit from these rich farmlands. The land was overworked and destroyed, the beautiful mansions on the lands were filled with farm animals and ruined. Guess what? The poor were still poor- just now they had some worthless land too.

  A few years ago I saw a Peace Corps endeavor where some volunteers came and taught some marketing and small business skills to women who produced textiles in their small rural communities. The knowledge and training they were given allowed them to sustain themselves quite nicely long after the volunteers and their money had gone.

  If you really want to help the poverty issue, there needs to be sharing of knowledge and skills- not wealth. This is why people who donate money to communities without offering any type of additional training or education only create dependence. Once the money runs out, that community is screwed. This is in the event that the funds even reach the people that need it. I also saw how regional leaders kept all the money that was given to people in their communities that needed the funds. I've seen clothing sold that was supposed to be given. The list goes on and on- corruption is real. It's important to look at results not good intentions.

  I also have to say that there is a huge difference between being born poor in a country like the US and one that has caste like system that occurs in Latin America or India, for example. Poor people in those countries simply have very few opportunities to improve their situation - no matter how hard working they are. This is why endeavors that are led by people from within the community are better than those by foreigners with absolutely no concept of how things work and lack the cultural/historical knowledge needed who try to implement their idea of "help" without collaboration from the people themselves.

  "Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime."
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  49

  "You owe Jehovah humility and HONESTY" - an email from a JW

  by Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  hey forum goers.

  i'd like your opinions on constructing an email reply to this shocker below.

  bit of background about the sender: she is a middle-aged, cheery uberdub whose siblings left when a schism occured in her congregation in canada way back when.

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  mentalclarity

  First, hope your son has a swift recovery.

  I'd probably write an email with all the things I'd like to respond and then just delete it. It's best not to engage with crazy people and especially since you are still in the process of fading. Whatever you respond would do nothing to sway her own convictions, but it might be cathartic for you just to write it and not send it.
  
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  Retirement Planning

  by Whynot in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  since waking up i can't help but look at the future in a different way.

  while i was working i felt it was ridiculous for me to start a 401k because i thought for sure the end would come before i retired.

  but now, i'm a stay at home mom with very small children and it bothers me that i have done nothing to prepare for the future.

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  mentalclarity

  There are lot of great free resources for financial planning/advising out there. Check out your state university's extension page for any type of family and community department- most have short online programs for free that give you the basics. I know of one in particular- if you pm I can send you the info. There are also community education classes in local colleges that usually have some sort of finance class.

  Now, getting some sort of education- whether it be a certificate or degree is easier than ever and will help a lot until you are ready to join the workforce again. There are online/weekend/evening classes available and you might even qualify for financial aid. It's totally doable. I did it while working and raising kids on my own. You have the support of a husband.

  I personally feel education is the best route to go- the difference is just huge when you are looking for a job. Right off the bat you can access more job opportunities that have a degree requirement. Second your pay is going to depend a lot on your degree and experience. I agree so much with scratchme1010. Let go of that mentality of accepting "crumbs". That false humbleness that JWs have....oh just give me that crumb that fell off the floor, I'll be happy with that. Why? why not go for the gold? why not aspire to do more than entry level work? And this is coming from someone who did the grunt work and worked my ass off. It was totally worth it. I know it can be overwhelming, especially with few role models and examples when you grow up JW. But with information at our fingertips and resources, you can really set yourself up no matter what background you're coming from.
  
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  Letters Project - What do I say to my family

  by Odrade in

  1. forum
  2. links

  hey my old friends, i figured since this is where we landed when we first fled the watchtower, looking for support, back in '03, maybe i should pop back in and show you my latest project - i see some familiar faces around here.

  i've been working on a website to function as part story, part news.

  my plan is to feature what people are doing to integrate/reintegrate into their community - whether that's remaining in the xjw circles to help others who are leaving, or moving out into the larger social sphere and starting projects, being activists for other causes, etc.

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  mentalclarity

  This is a great idea! I personally did not write a letter or email to my family so as to save the little relationship we have, but I really applaud the courage it takes to write one.

  It's so incredibly personal and gives a glimpse into someone's life to read their letters, especially for us exjws who can relate with so much of what is expressed.
  
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  33

  Do you miss that initial "high" ??

  by stuckinarut2 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  do you remember the first time you found out "the truth about the truth"?.

  yes, it was confronting, shocking and life altering.

  yes it was hard to deal with.. but, along with that, many have said that they experienced a sense of thrill, euphoria, or joy when realising the facts about the religion that held us captive mentally and physically for so long.. it was liberating to learn some of the controversial teachings etc.

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  mentalclarity

  I didn't experience a "high" but it was very validating. After years of thinking I was the crazy one because I just didn't get it and thinking I must lack faith or not have studied hard enough or a hundred excuses why I was unhappy with the "truth" when everyone was so joyful about paradise... It was kind of like ohhhhhhh I was right all along and I should have trusted my instincts. But imagine being the lone dissenter among your family and friends. Every single person close to you believes whole heartedly and you're left scratching your head. It makes you seriously self-doubt.

  Honesty with just a couple of things that I found out weren't true...that was enough. No more digging was needed. I didn't need to delve into old Watchtowers or books just to see how wrong it was. That was just overkill for me at that point.
  
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  20

  Need some encouragemant

  by LogansRun in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  its been awhile since i've commented but i come by and read your posts about once a week.

  so why do i need a pep talk ?

  after almost 2 years into my fade these bastards won't give it a rest constant hang ups on my answering machine and today for the first time in about 6 months they come to my apartment complex but thankfully couldn't get in they did keep buzzing me so they were here looking for me.

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  mentalclarity

  The best way to get rid of them is to move- far, far away. The best decision I ever made