Scenario 1
Elder: Well, brother smith, it's been a while since we've seen you at the meeting?
B. Smith: <shakes head ruefully> I know, it's just been really busy at work and I'm struggling tro get there.
Elder: Well, you know how important the meetings are, don't you?
B. Smith: Yes brother, I'll try harder.
Elder: Good, I'm pleased we've had this opportunity to chat.
Scenario 2
Elder: Well, brother smith, it's been a while since we've seen you at the meeting?
B. Smith : Thanks for enquiring brother but I have my own personal and private reasons for not going.
Elder: Hmm, that sounds worrying brother smith, anything we can help with?
B. Smith: No thank you, my reasons are private.
Elder: Okay brother smith <runs off to huddle with other elders>
If you want to fade, then do it without raising suspicion.
If you want to go out in a blaze of glory then just do it.