dear brothers and sisters:.
there is darkness in this world.
many have e-mailed me with concerns and asking for help and advise.
Your dodging the issues JWMan, exactly as I predicted.
The only thing missing from my life is that organization, and thats the best thing thats ever happened to me.
Now answer the inquiries I made in my previous post.
Your only serving to prove me right, you cannot.
The true Kingdom of God is located in your heart, not an organization of hypocrites.
www.geocities.com/latinloverchicago/Jason1.html for my new webpage and info!! Im trying to live now!!
dear brothers and sisters:.
there is darkness in this world.
many have e-mailed me with concerns and asking for help and advise.
Once again JWMan you are avoiding the issues at hand.
If your organization is indeed the truth.. answer why did the WTBTS knowingly affiliate itself with the United Nations as a registered Non-Governmental Organization and then revoked their membership only when the knowledge of the alliance was made public? Surely even someone as devout as you can reason that accepting and abiding by the UN Charter for membership as an NGO is total hypocrisy and against every fundamental teaching the WTBTS has preached from the platform and in literature for decades.
Explain.. why has the WTBTS which is allegedly spirit directed by God, changed its stance on issues such as blood transfusions time and time again.
Explain JWMan, why the WTBTS has overstepped the boundaries of the Bible and decided to implement standards pertaining to facial grooming and sex between married couples? Issues which possess no Scriptural backbone.
The reality is you cannot.
I fully expect you to reply with some concocted nonsense about how all of us are in darkness or angry, when in fact I am simply acknowledging issues at hand which are very plain and clear cut. So I say to you, either provide substantiated reason for the above stated issues, or cease and desist with your ranting.
The true Kingdom of God is located in your heart, not an organization of hypocrites.
www.geocities.com/latinloverchicago/Jason1.html for my new webpage and info!! Im trying to live now!!
you know, i've been out of the borg since '94 and still, once in a while, it pops into my head that something i am doing or are planning on doing is something that i would have been denied me if i had decided to stay in.
this time it's seeing the lord of the rings movie.
i love those books so much and can't wait to see the film over and over.
Yes I very much look forward to seeing the LOTR films.
We all remember the endless drivel from the platform about how magic and sorcery is so demonic.
ITS A SCIENCE FICTION MOVIE PEOPLE. WAKE UP.
Its fantasy.
Anyway, I think Ill be seeing it on Wednesday night, opening evening.
The true Kingdom of God is located in your heart, not an organization of hypocrites.
www.geocities.com/latinloverchicago/Jason1.html for my new webpage and info!! Im trying to live now!!
first of all id like to say hello to everyone on this website, and to thank and acknowledge each and every one of you for your individuality, personal experience, and in some cases, commitment to truth.. having read some of the heartfelt topics and posts here have served to be a great encouragement to me, more than some could imagine.
my name is jason, and i am a recovering ex-jw.. i guess this would be an ideal time to tell my life story as an abbreviated version, so here goes.. i was "born into, or raised" in the organization.
my grandfather was an elder for 45 years, and served as one of the very first jw in the south chicagoland suburbs.
I thank you for the kind words Billygoat.
Perhaps you are correct, and Ive only been unfortunate enough to encounter only one aspect of the man, and considering what Ive been through, I find it completely understandable for people to be skeptical. Im much more skeptical of any and all people now than I was before. Call it a true awakening.
I find it deplorable that people would lie about things like that, but it does happen. I dont want anyone's donations, and I dont want anyone's pity either. I just dont want another honest, good-hearted person to suffer as I have suffered at the hands of a corrupt organization and its people who will chew you up and spit you out despite years of loyal service and thats not even considering the countless lies and brainwashing practices bestowed upon the masses.
The true Kingdom of God is located in your heart, not an organization of hypocrites.
www.geocities.com/latinloverchicago/Jason1.html for my new webpage and info!! Im trying to live now!!
first of all id like to say hello to everyone on this website, and to thank and acknowledge each and every one of you for your individuality, personal experience, and in some cases, commitment to truth.. having read some of the heartfelt topics and posts here have served to be a great encouragement to me, more than some could imagine.
my name is jason, and i am a recovering ex-jw.. i guess this would be an ideal time to tell my life story as an abbreviated version, so here goes.. i was "born into, or raised" in the organization.
my grandfather was an elder for 45 years, and served as one of the very first jw in the south chicagoland suburbs.
For the sake of discussion COMF, you strike me as the type of a$$hole that if someone was just mugged, your first reaction in talking to them would be to see how many holes you can punch in their story to see if they made it up for an insurance scam.
Lets be honest, to continue to press the issue of someone having inconsistencies is to question their honesty. To call me slow on the pickup is also an indirect insult thrust in my direction. Your about the most impolite person Ive ever encountered online.
Ok, now.. to be more specific.
The elders and others already knew we were 'talking' because she had visited my congregation and I had visited hers on a few occasions. She lives in an apartment with her two older sisters, age 20 and 21. Her older sister was also dating my friend at the time, so often we would go visit together and double date because it was more fun in groups and it is also encouraged to be in groups. So yes, it is 3 girls in an apartment. Her family nor anyone else knew that I and my friend had spent the night on a few occasions with their invite, and that even on a few occasions I spent the night by myself with her on her invite. We just enjoyed one anothers company and it was a 90minute drive home for me, so often I would stay.
Now, when her mother found out that I had spent the night, she made the story up that we had been drinking, that I slept in her bed with her, and forced myself upon her. What other reason would she make this up other than to make herself look like being a Pioneer she would NEVER allow a man to spend the night with her? To save face.
Her mother gave her the ultimatum that either she would go to the elders about it, or that her mother would. I learned this from her older sister. Then she told her elders this story as soon as possible, and I knew nothing of it. I had just went home thinking all was as usual.
When I had called her two days later she even had the audacity to lie to me on the phone and tell me that her friend was in a car accident and she would be out of town. I believed it at the time hook-line-and-sinker, but little did I know it was an all-out-lie so she could avoid me until the elders had their way with me. I didnt learn about this until later, when I angrily confronted her and her family and brought this accident up, when her mother said "what accident?" but somehow justified a blatant lie because it was the elders who told her to avoid me.
So I went to my meeting. Sitting in the audience as usual, most of you know how it goes. Tapped on the shoulder, "your wanted in the back". Not expecting anything bad, I walk to the back pretty casually.
When I walk in 3 elders are sitting there. This is where it got ugly, I personally believe your guilty until proven innocent, and that the perspective is not only skewed to the person who goes blabbing first, but also to a woman. Ever notice how so often the woman gets reproved or nothing, and the guy gets DF'd?
Paraphrasing what was said because Ill never forget that night.
"Have a seat"
"Its come to our attention some inappropriate events have taken place between you and Celeste (her name) anything you wanna tell us about?"
Dumbfounded I said no not particularly.
"Is it true that youve been spending the night there rather frequently?" Now consider they werent interested in the fact that she had invited me to spend the night, that she WANTED me to spend the night, that she allowed me to spend the night, only that I was in fact there.
I was honest, I said yes I had.
I am 21, she is underage to be drinking.
"Is it true that you drank alcoholic beverages while there?"
Honest, yes we did.
"Did you or her get drunk" (drunkenness is also a grounds for DF)
No, I did not get drunk, she got pretty buzzed though.
Did you sleep in the same room as her?
"Yes I slept in the same bed, we often did, its better than sleeping on the floor, besides she invited me to sleep in her bed!" (This was the case every time I spent the night there. I always slept in the bed, I wasnt gonna sleep on the hardwood floor)
Then COMF, is when it got to the part you sought clarification on, and when these questions hit, it thunderstruck me. Resoundingly untrue, but they kept asking very specific questions, with seemingly no regard for my emotions.
"Did you force yourself upon her?" NO
Even after I said no, they had already received confirmation from me that I was in the same bed and she was buzzed, so like friggin police detectives they asked
Did she resist you? Did you touch her private parts? You know thats porneia dont you? Did you commit porneia?"
NO, NO, NO, NO.
Well her body of elders has contacted us and informed us she states you took advantage of her while there. That she tried to resist you, and that being a pioneer she would never allow herself to commit something like that.
---
To anyone reading, is it more clear now why I am angry? And is this perhaps a little more detailed so as to provide clarification for your inquiries? COMF, Im sure youll find some inconsistency here, lawyers work wonders in twisting the truth so that it fits their agenda. I dont have reason to sit here and fabricate anything on an online board. I came across this website with the intent of at least talking and venting, not having my integrity questioned. Like it or not, your statements have questioned my integrity. I fully expect you to reply with some sarcastic remark or glaring inconsistency youve uncovered. Your a pretty rude guy you know that. If someone was indeed a victim of being lied about, used, abused, or something of the sort, your the kind when they are just pouring out their heart telling their story, your more interested in intricate details and inconsistencies, often making them feel as if you are somehow blaming them; when they are just venting, in need of encouragement or acknowledgment, and you provide just the opposite.
So I say to you, if you are indeed going to reply to this post, and I know that you will.. you strike me as the type who likes the last word and to feel important, either say something kind and encouraging, or say nothing at all. If you sit here and try to poke inconsistencies in what Ive said, I will just ignore you from this point forward. That clear enough for you? If your indeed capable of saying something kind. I have no problem being thorough and telling what happened, in fact I feel a little better just typing it away and posting it for the world to see, its out there and not building up in my stomach ya know? But I wont tolerate being insulted (slow on the pickup) nor having my integrity questioned (make it look questionable all by itself)
So COMF, over the last few months of things Ive tolerated, I say this. Say something nice, or shut the hell up. Any further instigating or rude remarks from you will be disregarded.
The true Kingdom of God is located in your heart, not an organization of hypocrites.
www.geocities.com/latinloverchicago/Jason1.html for my new webpage and info!! Im trying to live now!!
but i felt your post was so clear and relevant to all the threads "wars" that i didn't want it to get lost....lol sorry to "cut and paste" you .
after a three month hiatus i have returned to this board and started posting again.
i have to admit, it was a big mistake.
Very touching comments, and I couldnt agree more with him.
The true Kingdom of God is located in your heart, not an organization of hypocrites.
www.geocities.com/latinloverchicago/Jason1.html for my new webpage and info!! Im trying to live now!!
first of all id like to say hello to everyone on this website, and to thank and acknowledge each and every one of you for your individuality, personal experience, and in some cases, commitment to truth.. having read some of the heartfelt topics and posts here have served to be a great encouragement to me, more than some could imagine.
my name is jason, and i am a recovering ex-jw.. i guess this would be an ideal time to tell my life story as an abbreviated version, so here goes.. i was "born into, or raised" in the organization.
my grandfather was an elder for 45 years, and served as one of the very first jw in the south chicagoland suburbs.
Inconsistencies in my story? Granted, the only thing we have here on an online board to express our emotions or feelings is words, but for you to question my honesty so blatantly I feel warrants a defensive streak. Especially considering all Ive been put through I dont need someone who doesnt even know me accusing me based on semantics when all I did was type from the heart, I apologize if I didnt take the time to make it novelesque for you to be completely satisfied with grammar.
I was accused of something I did not do. I was questioned by a band of brothers in a committee at a congregation I had just transferred to about something I did not do. I confirmed that I spent the night there, but when it became interrogated about sexual matters which never took place because she wanted to make it look like I forced myself upon her, that was way past any line of decency.
Whats so inconsistent about the truth? If you have any questions whatsoever feel free to ask me specifically, I have no reason to come onto an online board and lie to complete strangers about the unfortunate events in my life. I just needed to vent my frustration, not having any friends virtually because the organization didnt allow comraderie with "worldly" folk, then leaving that behind as well makes one seem pretty alone, so I wanted somewhere to talk. It seems your trying to sit and psychoanalyze every single word I type and if all your going to do is question my integrity, I ask you to leave me alone. Ive had enough BS in my life, I dont need more from you. If you want to be comforting or share the common interest in believing that there are serious issues in the world which need addressing, then by all means Im up for chat.
The true Kingdom of God is located in your heart, not an organization of hypocrites.
www.geocities.com/latinloverchicago/Jason1.html for my new webpage and info!! Im trying to live now!!
new york times december 15, 2001 .
in a startling revelation, the watchtower bible and tract society of brooklyn ny, parent organization to the jehovah's witness religion, was exposed for a stark contradiction in their religious practices.. it was revealed this week by the guardian (a leading uk newspaper) that the governing body of the watchtower religion had secretly erected a christmas tree in celebration of the festive season.
when the facts were made public this week, the watchtower quickly, and quietly, removed the tree to another location.. paul gilles, spokesman for the watchtower in great briton, wrote a letter to the guardian, in which he stated that the "tree was in no way secret" and that it was "necessary to gain access to the un library".
No it is not real unfortunately. I have a copy of todays NY Times or any of you online can go to their website with all articles for the day at
I wish people would stick to factual information ONLY. The jokes are humorous, but only serve to damage the credibility of those who provide factual inaccuracies and in turn make the WTBTS look even more righteous in that people are fabricating lies to attempt to make them look contempt.
The true Kingdom of God is located in your heart, not an organization of hypocrites.
www.geocities.com/latinloverchicago/Jason1.html for my new webpage and info!! Im trying to live now!!
first of all id like to say hello to everyone on this website, and to thank and acknowledge each and every one of you for your individuality, personal experience, and in some cases, commitment to truth.. having read some of the heartfelt topics and posts here have served to be a great encouragement to me, more than some could imagine.
my name is jason, and i am a recovering ex-jw.. i guess this would be an ideal time to tell my life story as an abbreviated version, so here goes.. i was "born into, or raised" in the organization.
my grandfather was an elder for 45 years, and served as one of the very first jw in the south chicagoland suburbs.
I would like to thank the multitude of replies Ive received relatively overnight. I never expected so much feedback.
Now, COMF; to provide clarification on a few things I perhaps worded incorrectly which allowed people to see things from a perspective I did not intend.
I stated "the story which came about" because it was a total lie, and I dont know how many people were involved. Her own family began spreading the rumor as well to try to project me as the bad guy and preserve her image "within" the congregation. Needless to say I dont know if she made it up herself or if it was with the help of her sadistic family, so I just typed "the story that came about" because it was just that, a concocted story. She did INDEED lie, and Ive no problem saying so.
Regarding "trivial sexual details".. she went to the brothers and told them this entire story before I had first clue of what was going on. And when they finally confronted me about it and before they even bothered to hear my side of it they preferred to just interrogate me first. "Did you touch her private areas? Did you initiate intercourse? Did she resist? Was it porneia? etc etc BS." I didnt even get to tell my side before being questioned about all this sexual stuff WHICH NEVER EVEN HAPPENED. Quite frankly that really pissed me off.
That clarify things a bit?
Now to typecast me a "rescuer".. perhaps you should know more about the situation or the individual before being so expertly capable of categorization.
I did not know she had family problems when we first met. Quite honestly Im sure you can admit you dont know everything about a person or their family when you first start dating.. as was the case with me here.
In my past relationships (Worldly while I was out the first time) I did not deal with any women who had family problems, so this was a first-time experience for me. To be giving from the heart and be hurt so maliciously was an ordeal I would wish upon no person. Thast all I did.. not trying to "bypass usual courting rituals"
Now COMF..
"The advantage the rescuer sees in such an arrangement is that he gets to bypass the usual courting rituals and the likelihood of rejection, and jump straight into the relationship. Who's going to reject a guy who's giving them what they need? And so lovingly, self-sacrificingly, too, driving two hours in a hailstorm just to wipe her tears!"
That was way outta line buddy. You make it sound as if you feel I was trying to take advantage of a situation, why dont you just cast a finger as well? Again, Id never dealt with any woman who had family problems like that before, so I acted from the heart and tried to help all I could, to no avail. Your certainly entitled to your opinion and to express it, but your certainly not qualified to diagnose either, and quite frankly, YOUR WRONG.
Therapy? Ive already considered that and have recently seen a psych.. I feel like Tony Soprano almost lol. Pour out feelings about family and friends and the very strange upbringing former JW have to contend with.
Anyway, I sincerely hope I was able to straighten a few things out here. Having someone try to label me a rescuer and perceive some things I said incorrectly was a bit troubling.
I want to thank you guys for your sincere words of kindness and your response, it feels really good to know there are some people quite like me here.
The true Kingdom of God is located in your heart, not an organization of hypocrites.
www.geocities.com/latinloverchicago/Jason1.html for my new webpage and info!! Im trying to live now!!
first of all id like to say hello to everyone on this website, and to thank and acknowledge each and every one of you for your individuality, personal experience, and in some cases, commitment to truth.. having read some of the heartfelt topics and posts here have served to be a great encouragement to me, more than some could imagine.
my name is jason, and i am a recovering ex-jw.. i guess this would be an ideal time to tell my life story as an abbreviated version, so here goes.. i was "born into, or raised" in the organization.
my grandfather was an elder for 45 years, and served as one of the very first jw in the south chicagoland suburbs.
First of all Id like to say hello to everyone on this website, and to thank and acknowledge each and every one of you for your individuality, personal experience, and in some cases, commitment to truth.
Having read some of the heartfelt topics and posts here have served to be a great encouragement to me, more than some could imagine.
My name is Jason, and I am a recovering ex-JW.
I guess this would be an ideal time to tell my life story as an abbreviated version, so here goes.
I was "born into, or raised" in the organization. My grandfather was an elder for 45 years, and served as one of the very first JW in the south Chicagoland suburbs. He converted to JW immediately after serving in WWII, undoubtedly appealed by the notion of peace and life, having endured the stench of death for far too long while serving his country. He and my grandmother converted to JW way back in the early 1940's, even having attended the famed convention at the Polo Grounds in NY.
Anyway, my mother was 'born' into the truth also, and I guess the reason Im even going back this far is to stress the point there was alot of imbedded JW history engrained into my family before I was even conceived.
Now to me. My father was never a JW, never expressed much interest in organized religion period, and my mother met and married him in her early 20's, her rebelling period.
I was 'born' into the Truth, and my grandfather all too often assumed the role of father for me because to be blunt, my dad was a deadbeat. My father molested my sister, drank too much, and caused many family problems, so my grandfather lovingly paid the bills, cared for me, taught me, and took me to meetings as a child even if to get me away from the family squabbles.
To an impressionable child, it appeared the Truth was the obvious and only solution. I love my grandfather dearly to this day, he gave from the heart without asking and firmly believed and possessed a love for God, so much so that even with ailments including high blood pressure, arthritis, diabetes, and chronic fatigue syndrome he went out in service in an electric wheelchair for 50 to 60 hours a week up until his death at age 85. Needless to say, seeing his commitment and love for God, I was moved. True organization or not, I believe his actions and faith will preserve him if there is a loving God.
Back to the story, despite serious problems at home, I excelled in school. I attribute this to committing myself unwaveringly to something to make myself feel successful or needed. I graduated from high school at age 16, and from college with my BA at age 19. In my childhood I was not allowed to have any friends unless they were JW, and I was not allowed to participate in extracurricular activities even though I know I couldve starred on the football team because I snuck to a practice and was offered a starting spot.
The congregation I attended the first 18 yrs of my life was a very odd one. Canterbury Congregation in Markham, Illinois. We were the only white family to attend, the rest of the Hall was black. There was supposed to be no racism, but I found myself often left out of activities. Not to mention it felt awkward being a little white boy amidst everyone else who was nothing like me. But I was forced to go, and eventually found solace in the teachings, believing it to be truth.
I remained extremely faithful and zealous for several years, until my grandfather died. He was my motivation, and with his passing, I felt as though my heart were ripped from my chest. At this time, I entered a severe state of depression, and this is where the revelation began. Over a 2 yr period.. do you know how many Witnesses from the Congregation I grew up in visitied me? ZERO. Every teenager in my age bracket who went to that Hall, 8 in total, no longer attend meetings at all, chalking it up to hypocrisy.. yet the elders there maintain something is wrong with each one of us.. and not the congregation. LOL
So, I stopped going to the Hall after my grandfather died, and they just tossed me to the side. No visits, no friends to associate with because I was labeled "bad association" simply because I stopped attending out of depression. How sick is that?
For 2 years I stopped going to the Hall, and then something much worse lurked over the horizon.
My mom remained in the organization, my brother is now married and remains in the organization, having married a pioneer.
Just casually I ended up meeting an extremely beautiful woman who winded up being a sister, and also a pioneer. It had been 2 years of loneliness so I figured I would give it one last shot, so I tried to date her and go back to the hall, albeit transferring to a different one.
My mom and brother and all parties involved were so sure this was the right thing for me, that "Jehovah would bless me" for drawing back to him like the prodigal son, and that being with a sister who is a pioneer would encourage and strengthen me, so heres what happened.
We dated for a time, and she enjoyed dancing, going out to restauraunts or theme parks, but she had family problems too. Her father kicked her out of her home at age 18 for no reason, so I lovingly helped her move her furniture. She often got depressed because her sister was suicidal.. what did I do? I drove 2 hours in a hailstorm to wipe her tears. I cooked for her, cleaned, took her out... spared no expense on this woman I thought I loved and that was a "pioneer"
When her mother who is also a JW found out that she had gotten an apt and allowed me to spend the night, even though we never had sex, she went to tell the others, and to make herself look innocent.. the story which came about was that I attempted to rape her. Now picture that. To be accused of a sickening crime such as rape by someone you felt you loved, that was supposed to be a pioneer, and to be brought before a judicial committee for something you had not done. To have your name tarnished all over again, all to make herself look innocent.
I had my doubts over that 2 yr period when no brothers came to visit me, but after the experience with the accused rape and the judicial hearing in which the brothers seemed obsessed with trivial sexual details as though they enjoyed discussing it I knew without question this was not Gods organization. Having done extensive research on failed prophecies, UN association, Friend of the Court filings to save money when they projected it as only a change in policy to donation basis.. when I learned these things I disassociated myself from the organization and cursed the day I ever met and had to live the first 21 yrs of my life in confusion because of these a$$holes.
As it is now, I am alone, or so it feels. I dont have any friends my age because the only ones I had growing up were JW. My own brother and my mother either barely or wont associate with me because I DA myself. I see the hypocrisy and the lies and the politics within, but now I am alone. I feel liberated because I have had the courage to walk away from such a corrupt and sick organization, but its hard to be alone.
I feel like I have so much to offer. I am 21, in good health, multiracial, love to cook, speak 5 languages, have my degree, a personal trainer, have old loving family values in which I promised to be a better man than my father was, but now I am alone. The organization ruined my life. Now I am trying to pick up the pieces. I know this thread seems rambled, well it is because I have spoken what comes to mind and what is in my heart. Im sure I can put much more together cohesively if anyone wants to chat. Reading this forum and seeing other people overcome seemingly impossible odds inspired me.
Im looking for friends, so if anyone wants to chat, email me at
Most Sincerely
Jason
