Posts by RedhorseWoman

23

They Came back

by Theophilus in

howdy.

after an unfortunate absence i have returned.

ina previous thread, i shared that i had initially begun my research into jw doctrine and such after being approached (some would say accosted) by a pair of well meaning jw's one saturday morning.

RedhorseWoman

Frenchy, my dear, you are GOOD.....I mean REALLY, REALLY good!!

92

Reflections

by Frenchy in

jw
friends

im starting a new thread because its time i left the bergman discussion.

i would like to address some comments made by ahhah, however, comments which have given me reason to look deep into myself.. even then, i wonder how objective a person could ever be after having had part of their life taken from them by a cult association.

on the other hand, who else (other than an ex-jw) would ever care enough to work as tirelessly as he seems to have in attempting to document the potential harm of this religion (biased as it may be).

RedhorseWoman

I'm doing a copy and paste here from the site http://www.freedomofmind.com which has been set up by ex-Moonie Steven Hassan. He does a lot of work on the cult issue. Someone had e-mailed this to me quite some time ago, and although many of the points initially made me uncomfortable, I found it to be enlightening, to say the least. Enjoy!

Mind Control - The BITE Model
From chapter two of Releasing the Bonds: Empowering People to Think for Themselves *

Destructive mind control can be understood in terms of four basic components, which form the acronym BITE:

I. Behavior Control
II. Information Control
III. Thought Control
IV. Emotional Control

It is important to understand that destructive mind control can be determined when the overall effect of these four components promotes dependency and obedience to some leader or cause. It is not necessary for every single item on the list to be present. Mind controlled cult members can live in their own apartments, have nine-to-five jobs, be married with children, and still be unable to think for themselves and act independently.

I. Behavior Control

1. Regulation of individual’s physical reality

a. Where, how and with whom the member lives and associates with
b. What clothes, colors, hairstyles the person wears
c. What food the person eats, drinks, adopts, and rejects
d. How much sleep the person is able to have
e. Financial dependence
f. Little or no time spent on leisure, entertainment, vacations

2. Major time commitment required for indoctrination sessions and group rituals

3. Need to ask permission for major decisions

4. Need to report thoughts, feelings and activities to superiors

5. Rewards and punishments (behavior modification techniques- positive and negative).

5. Individualism discouraged; group think prevails

6. Rigid rules and regulations

7. Need for obedience and dependency

II. Information Control

1. Use of deception

a. Deliberately holding back information
b. Distorting information to make it acceptable
c. Outright lying

2. Access to non-cult sources of information minimized or discouraged

a. Books, articles, newspapers, magazines, TV, radio
b. Critical information
c. Former members
d. Keep members so busy they don’t have time to think

3. Compartmentalization of information; Outsider vs. Insider doctrines

a. Information is not freely accessible
b. Information varies at different levels and missions within pyramid
c. Leadership decides who "needs to know" what

4. Spying on other members is encouraged

a. Pairing up with "buddy" system to monitor and control
b. Reporting deviant thoughts, feelings, and actions to leadership

5. Extensive use of cult generated information and propaganda

a. Newsletters, magazines, journals, audio tapes, videotapes, etc.
b. Misquotations, statements taken out of context from non-cult sources

6. Unethical use of confession

a. Information about "sins" used to abolish identity boundaries
b. Past "sins" used to manipulate and control; no forgiveness or absolution

III. Thought Control

1. Need to internalize the group’s doctrine as "Truth"

a. Map = Reality
b. Black and White thinking
c. Good vs. evil
d. Us vs. them (inside vs. outside)

2. Adopt "loaded" language (characterized by "thought-terminating clichés"). Words are the tools we use to think with. These "special" words constrict rather than expand understanding. They function to reduce complexities of experience into trite, platitudinous "buzz words".

3. Only "good" and "proper" thoughts are encouraged.

4. Thought-stopping techniques (to shut down "reality testing" by stopping "negative" thoughts and allowing only "good" thoughts); rejection of rational analysis, critical thinking, constructive criticism.

a. Denial, rationalization, justification, wishful thinking
b. Chanting
c. Meditating
d. Praying
e. Speaking in "tongues"
f. Singing or humming

5. No critical questions about leader, doctrine, or policy seen as legitimate

6. No alternative belief systems viewed as legitimate, good, or useful

IV. Emotional Control

1. Manipulate and narrow the range of a person’s feelings.

2. Make the person feel like if there are ever any problems it is always their fault, never the leader’s or the group’s.

3. Excessive use of guilt

a. Identity guilt

1. Who you are (not living up to your potential)
2. Your family
3. Your past
4. Your affiliations
5. Your thoughts, feelings, actions

b. Social guilt
c. Historical guilt

4. Excessive use of fear

a. Fear of thinking independently
b. Fear of the "outside" world
c. Fear of enemies
d. Fear of losing one’s "salvation"
e. Fear of leaving the group or being shunned by group
f. Fear of disapproval

5. Extremes of emotional highs and lows.

6. Ritual and often public confession of "sins".

7. Phobia indoctrination : programming of irrational fears of ever leaving the group or even questioning the leader’s authority. The person under mind control cannot visualize a positive, fulfilled future without being in the group.

a. No happiness or fulfillment "outside"of the group
b. Terrible consequences will take place if you leave: "hell"; "demon possession"; "incurable diseases"; "accidents"; "suicide"; "insanity"; "10,000 reincarnations"; etc.
c. Shunning of leave takers. Fear of being rejected by friends, peers, and family.
d. Never a legitimate reason to leave. From the group’s perspective, people who leave are: "weak"; "undisciplined"; "unspiritual"; "worldly"; "brainwashed by family, counselors"; seduced by money, sex, rock and roll.

23

They Came back

by Theophilus in

howdy.

after an unfortunate absence i have returned.

ina previous thread, i shared that i had initially begun my research into jw doctrine and such after being approached (some would say accosted) by a pair of well meaning jw's one saturday morning.

RedhorseWoman

All we can do is hope. I know that in my own case, I noticed discrepancies and inequities long before I ever left. I spent years blaming myself for not being a good enough Witness so that I could adequately dismiss these "bad" thoughts.

Any seeds planted will most likely lay dormant for years. However, once a JW begin to actually think, the progression to freedom is inevitable.

23

Witnet Admin Resigns

by Pathofthorns in

jw
friends

my hats off to the witnet administration team.

it is very sad to see them go, as the last few months have been quite interesting.

of course, those who follow the board know that in recent weeks there have been quite a few problems surfacing.. its obvious many of these individuals had concerns much like we have here.

RedhorseWoman

Yes, I noticed that. They really did try to be balanced, and I guess they took an awful lot of heat for it....mainly from the staunch JW's. I guess they got pretty nasty from some of the posts I had read.

There are quite a few there who are thinking and discussing. Still active, but thinking. I hope Obed keeps the site open, and I hope it doesn't deteriorate into a free-for-all.

23

They Came back

by Theophilus in

howdy.

after an unfortunate absence i have returned.

ina previous thread, i shared that i had initially begun my research into jw doctrine and such after being approached (some would say accosted) by a pair of well meaning jw's one saturday morning.

RedhorseWoman

Difficult task. Very difficult. I've been trying some of the above techniques (although I must admit that I've probably not handled it as well as I should) on an unmoderated active JW discussion board I stumbled across. I've asked them pointed questions about blood fractions, loss of privileges for those JW men who grow a beard, allowed pagan/spiritistic practices in wedding celebrations, and similar things. So far, I have gotten no answers from them...just accusations that I'm twisting things. I don't know if I'll get anywhere at all there, but I'm hoping to plant a few seeds there at the very least.

46

New "doom and gloom" brochure

by TR in

jw
friends

the brochure "the new millenium- what does the future hold for you?

" was just deliverd to my house this morning.

my wife answered the door and took it from an elder jw that i saw walking away as my wife shut the door.

RedhorseWoman

TR, the information I've picked up from touring around the active JW sites indicates that this brochure campaign is "no talking, or minimal talking, and hand them the brochure".

Supposedly, this wondrous new information is SO important that they can't take the chance of a refusal. Most of the JW's are planning to leave their bookbags at home during the tract distribution so they don't spook anyone.

No one has been around to our area yet. In fact, we very seldom have ANY witnesses call on us. I'm beginning to think we're living in unassigned territory....oh, please, God, let us be in unassigned territory!!

92

Reflections

by Frenchy in

jw
friends

im starting a new thread because its time i left the bergman discussion.

i would like to address some comments made by ahhah, however, comments which have given me reason to look deep into myself.. even then, i wonder how objective a person could ever be after having had part of their life taken from them by a cult association.

on the other hand, who else (other than an ex-jw) would ever care enough to work as tirelessly as he seems to have in attempting to document the potential harm of this religion (biased as it may be).

RedhorseWoman

Thank you, AhHah. I have been totally inactive for about 16 years. I honestly feel that I have been "free" for less than 2. Finding other ex-JW's on the Internet who had experienced what I had and who felt as I did was a very heartening experience. Initially, I would read people's posts on discussion boards and cry....the pain was so deep.

I saw so much hurt and despair while in the BOrg, and every time one of those hurt sheep turned to the shepherds for help, they were told (as was I) to adjust their attitudes...to not look at people....people are imperfect and we just have to learn to live with it. These wrongs were not trivial. One of my friends married an elder's son. I had bad feelings about this young man, but he had such WONDERFUL credentials in the congregation. He turned out to be a wife beater. Once he became so angry that he tried to run down his wife with a car while she was pregnant. He then went on to sexually abuse his daughter. He had the right connections, however. No action was taken against him. However, my friend has been considered spiritually weak and bad association ever since she divorced him. Yes, unfortunately, she is still in. She feels she has nowhere else to go.

This organization crushes lives and mutilates souls.

92

Reflections

by Frenchy in

jw
friends

im starting a new thread because its time i left the bergman discussion.

i would like to address some comments made by ahhah, however, comments which have given me reason to look deep into myself.. even then, i wonder how objective a person could ever be after having had part of their life taken from them by a cult association.

on the other hand, who else (other than an ex-jw) would ever care enough to work as tirelessly as he seems to have in attempting to document the potential harm of this religion (biased as it may be).

RedhorseWoman

This thread has certainly brought out a lot of emotional responses. I agree with everything that has been said, but I'll add my own comments anyway.

I was brought up as a JW from the age of 7. I spent most of my childhood alone. We lived a good distance away from other JW children, my mother didn't drive, and, of course worldy friendships were discouraged.

School was hellish. It wasn't bad enough that I was introverted and bookish. The addition of a weird religion plummeted me to the bottom of the pecking order. No after-school activities were allowed, no school vacation was complete without plenty of field service. No holidays and having to refrain from any normal school activities with regard to holidays. I can remember taking courses in High School that were so terribly boring I wanted to cry. They finally let me mix college-level courses with my business courses so that I could have SOME sort of challenge. This wasn't generally done, however. Any dreams I had required college...which was forbidden...so I threw myself into the pursuit of a career in the ministry.

When my health fell apart after three years of pioneering, I found out just how important I was as a human being....I was a ZERO. I was made to feel like a failure to God as well as to the organization. When I had a bout with severe depression and begged one of the elders to visit me because I was afraid I might commit suicide, he told me that he couldn't because "it wouldn't look good to the World for a brother to be alone with a single sister in her apartment". My life meant nothing to him. I was a cipher....a statistic....hours and literature reported on a monthly timesheet...no more than that.

When I finally just faded away, no one cared. More than once I asked for help to try to go back, and I was told as the sisters hurriedly scuttled away, "You know, we just learned at the meeting that it is 7 times harder to come back from being inactive than it is to come into the Truth in the first place." I knew that....I wanted help....they told me to do it alone.

They took my childhood, they turned my adolescence into a drab parody of life, they took a bright future of learning and discovery that might have been and turned it into a bleak period of drudgery and failure. Then I was discarded like an old shoe....of no consequence. I was left with no social skills, no education, no idea of what to do with my life.

Angry? Yes, and I feel rightfully so.

31

Hi, I'm new here also

by notsureofmyself in

jw
friends

when i first checked out this board i also thought it was a board for active witnesses.

the more i read, the more i realized that it was pretty much a x-jw board--more to my liking.

i disassociated myself in december of '98.

RedhorseWoman

Ah, Israel.....where men are men....and sheep are scared.

54

Jerry Bergman, Ph.D. (psy) - JW insights

by AhHah in

jw
friends

this site also contains articles by ken raines, who seems to have developed the site.. url http://www.premier1.net/~raines/.

url http://www.premier1.net/~raines/story.html (ken raines).

url http://www.premier1.net/~raines/papers.html (j. bergman).

RedhorseWoman

AhHah, I agree with your point about getting the word out about the harm JW's can cause.

I think, however, that any sort of widespread, organized effort would be construed by JW's and others as persecution by disgruntled former members who couldn't live up to the "high standards" set by the group.

As limited as it is, I think that just by having discussion boards such as this and other support boards where anyone can ask questions, as well as individual "witnessing" about our experiences, can be very helpful.

The numbers of active publishers are slowly dropping every year. People are beginning to gain knowledge. Knowledge is anathema to the WTBTS.