@nonjwspouse That house looks amazing. As an air B&B it would have paid for itself quickly.
Posts by caves
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71If You Had The Choice To Live Anywhere In The World or Any State Where Would You Be?
by minimus ini do like the usa but winters suck!
florida has some charm but it gets brutal with heat and humidity.
california is too looney.
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17
Just a moan - regarding the latest trend in ignorance of the English language!
by The Fall Guy inin recent months i have noticed more and more people on the net (including here) are using this latest perversion of the english language -.
"i would of done this..........or he would of tried to change things".
it's would've - short for would have!.
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caves
I've noticed a decline in my own spelling and ability to write in cursive. My "smart phone" auto corrects words that I have spelled correctly and I have to manually input the word into the key touch system. It drives me crazy.
So I can see why the decline since people are just trusting the devices we have know better than we do?
Also, I really like math. Not more than 6-7 years ago I could work out some decently complicated problems in my head pretty fast. It was this year I noticed that I had stopped doing that because my phone does it for me. I was talking with a client about it who is 35 yrs plus my senior and she too said that she has noticed that basic math was harder on the fly since the rise of smartphones.
I was talking with other folks much older than me (which is my normal for the simple reason that it seems, over all, they are more educated) and all of them said that Latin was taught in middle and high school when they were young. I felt/feel cheated somehow. Now its a course in college that one chooses.
I remember when talking in "Ebonics" was a joke and then it was as if it became a statement of 'style' and other retard reasoning I wont go into here. OH NO YOU DI'-ENT. Ugh.
Personally I appreciate when some person genuinely points out to me when my wording is wrong.
The internet is loose for me, meaning I get in a hurry sometimes, allow myself to multi task and then not pay attention to precisely how I'm wording things.
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19
The Craziness of an Average Bible Study
by Number 6 inlast week i posted a thread asking about who knew any "real anointed" and got some cracking replies.. that got me to thinking, as someone brought up in the 70's and 80's in the watchtower religion, my experience of bible studeis in their homes and those who made it to the hall were mostly batshit crazy or at least people with some serious quirks.. i'll relate a few, none of whose names i remember with any clarity.. in our cong we had an older couple who were from london, but who had been in the 1950's in the circuit work in the mid west usa.
they brought along some woman one night they had started a study with who told everyone cheerfully she was a recovering alcoholic and this was her cure (coming to the meetings).
this went on for a few weeks until one night they brought her to the memorial and she was royally pissed, and i mean barely able to stand; and went up to the platform table and necked some wine.
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caves
I have an idea ,Hold my wine.... I live out in the boonies. Gets lonely, perhaps I should ask a jw over for a study for entertainment. Maybe smear lipstick on one eyebrow , wear a tie with a t-shirt, insist on listening to neahing horses in the background and wear skinny jeans that are way to tight. LOL.
I have seen some crazy stuff in a study. Glad it wasn't just me.
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25
Divorce/Terms of Agreement
by SFSDGUY ini'm a first time poster and i apologize if this topic has been discussed before.
when i met my wife she was disfellowshiped and were happy, got married, and had a kid.
after we had our daughter she got reinstated so her family and her jw "friends" could spend time with our daughter.
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caves
@SFDGUY- "Even though being a JW is part of it, I'm mainly going to focus on her unstable mental health and substance abuse".
That is a good idea.
I know there is much more to the story, like you said.
Here is how her jw support system could spin that. Since she's reinstated, that particular "slate" has been wiped clean in their eyes whether she is "clean or not" or "mentally healthy", because all she has to do is show up for meetings and lie about the drug part.Conversely in jws eyes , just her going back to the KH and being reinstated says/shows to them, shes "mentally fit and has broken from satans grasp." Jws do write letters in behalf of the parent in regards members character , trustworthiness, and mental health. They have no problem lying to cover 'jehovah's name'. Its really ingrained. And its sneaky. Its not something they would ever say openly to an outsider or in a court of law or to a lawyer. It will be used.
If you have lawyers, how will you prove anything with out a court Judge determining this? Lawyers are good to have. At the end of the day someone will pay support. That usually falls on the father. Okay so taking that out, because the lawyers will devise some agreement on that and submit to the court for record. How will you prove the mental instability and drug issue? Lawyers can fight for you using that, but not between lawyers.That would need a couple of things. Some sort of proof, child services, and then that's when a court judge will be needed. If you did try to use that between lawyers , then you give her and her jw support a clear insight into your thinking before the divorce. Do you want that? Just saying.
Once jws get a whiff of that word, 'court' then it can very well be a full frontal attack on you. They will shield her. In jw land , you are the bad guy no matter what. Its just how it is.
I really want this to work out for you. I'm not trying to be a bummer. And you do have a weapon/tool some playing leverage, with using drug use and mental stability issues. You'll have play it carefully.
Also why would you even want you child around a mentally unstable drug using jw? Because based on what I understand, your going to use that and still advocate for your daughter to live where? With her, or you? Both?
Just more food for thought.
I don't know you and you haven't filled in a lot of details so I will say that I look forward to further updates. Well wishes here.
I did say there is a way, that it was brutal but would likely work, especially given what you said. But, I will completely drop it as I don't want any jw reading it and using it. However it's a reverse of what they have done in other situations similar to yours. Won't mention it again because there are many missing pieces.
All the best.
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21
Self Driving Vehicles
by TD ini was so stoked about the whole idea a few years ago, but am having serious misgivings at this point.. what are your experiences / impressions / opinions?.
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caves
Car automated system: "Sir, we will not be able to park in the spot you requested due to spacing of the vehicles in front and behind."
Me: "Do it anyway, there will be a 2 ft space in the front and a 2 ft space in the rear."
Car automated system: "I'm sorry Sir, but I cannot allow this maneuver. The local jurisdiction says a vehicle must be at least 2 1/2 feet away from other vehicles while parked."
Me: Hits manual over ride and parks my car the way I want.
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Me: "Auto car, see that street cart at the next corner? Please run over the cart."
Car automated system: "Sir that maneuver is not legal."
Me: Hits manual over ride and wipes out the brochure cart on my next right turn. LOL
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Me: "Auto car, turn into MacDonald's 1 block ahead."
Car automated system: "Sir your diet app says you have already exceeded your daily intake of calories today. I will pull into Jamba Juice instead, so that you my have a smoothie."
Me: "Never mind Auto car, Pull into the next junk yard." (Drops off car and walks to nearest Chevy dealership and buys a pickup.
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25
Divorce/Terms of Agreement
by SFSDGUY ini'm a first time poster and i apologize if this topic has been discussed before.
when i met my wife she was disfellowshiped and were happy, got married, and had a kid.
after we had our daughter she got reinstated so her family and her jw "friends" could spend time with our daughter.
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caves
@SFSDGUY- You wrote -Long story short the JWs have created a void in our relationship and I have filed for divorce for a couple reasons, but I'm worried about the JW upbringing being inflected on my daughter. We are currently in the process of divorce, and trying not to get a judge involved.
Not getting a judge involved? That can backfire in so many ways. Someone will have to pay childcare. Courts usually do not honor verbal child support agreements, and that's just the beginning. Whether you like it or not the courts WILL get involved. At least do some research man. The consequences of not knowing exactly what you dealing with will knock you down. The cards are stacked against you on both sides. I'd really hold off trusting doing this yourself with a jw soon to be ex-wife, coming out okay and it all working out in the wash. I guess you haven't experienced the 'jw flip a bitch, in a nano second' scenario.
This makes me sad. I smell trouble.
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25
Divorce/Terms of Agreement
by SFSDGUY ini'm a first time poster and i apologize if this topic has been discussed before.
when i met my wife she was disfellowshiped and were happy, got married, and had a kid.
after we had our daughter she got reinstated so her family and her jw "friends" could spend time with our daughter.
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caves
@carla -You could let her know that if she insists on bringing kids to kh then you will be bringing kids every other weekend to various faiths of the world. One week will be Catholic, Temple, Hindu, Protestant and so forth....
That move could quite possibly end all contact with his child. I've sen this card played way to many times with disastrous results. Jws do not play fair! At. All !!! At best he'd be labeled as 'under demonic influence', and as such the child probably told to pray privately non stop while in your care. Or something of that nature. What a way to make the child have mental issues on top of navigating mommy and daddy's divorce.
@SFSDGUY - I have a some questions.
1. Do you have a family beyond your wife and child, meaning a support system?
2. Do you realize, based on what you wrote, the gravity of your situation?
3. What does your wife say with words and between the lines about shared custody?
4. Has she openly judged you about not joining her in the "truth"?
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Do You Think Prostitution Should Be Decriminalized?
by minimus inin the us there is a bill in the house of representatives to decriminalize prostitution.
what do you think about that?.
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caves
LV101-Many are into weekend prostitution and fly in and out of Vegas returning to their home states and careers on Sunday night - hard to believe but it's true. This is nothing new - don't know how it could be decriminalized.
That is a round about decriminalization of sorts. What I wrote is a round about decriminalization of sorts.
Why are people talking about "Legal" prostitution? The title says "Decriminalization". Huge difference.
So are we talking legal prostitution, decriminalization, or both?
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Divorce/Terms of Agreement
by SFSDGUY ini'm a first time poster and i apologize if this topic has been discussed before.
when i met my wife she was disfellowshiped and were happy, got married, and had a kid.
after we had our daughter she got reinstated so her family and her jw "friends" could spend time with our daughter.
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caves
I'll be implementing this clause into our agreement.
"Accordingly, the Mother and Father shall not directly or indirectly influence (child) so as to estrange them from the other parent. Each parent shall also not do anything that might prejudice (child) against the other parent or impair their regard for the other parent. To further support this commitment, each parent shall do everything in her or his power to prevent any of their respective family members from doing or saying anything might prejudice (child) against the other parent or impair their regard for the other parent."
How could the courts possibly come up with real "proof" to enforce this? You'd have to literally be a detective 24/7. May as well stay.
This situation sucks. Unless your wife/ex wife wakes up and leaves the jws she will sneak all around this. Its part of the programming. Which is well in place since she has "gone back to get reinstated so her friends can see her daughter."
I did what your wife did. Personally, I was dfed for marrying out of the "truth". Went back for my son and support. All it did was drill the brainwashing in even further into my head. Point being, your going to have to get ruthless. It sounds like you may have a glimmer of hope about the possible "honest" intentions or kind nature about jws. The culture breeds and has a certain thinking that once you are out of the immediate picture , you are nothing more than the walking dead, that legally she ,your soon to be ex, will have to let you see your daughter. Twist, the custodial parent may /can and could take you back to court at anytime and come up with her own list of amendments, ect, rendering the "clause" moot. Yet in the eyes of jws its already moot.
You will have to fight to get anywhere or even remain in a position to see your daughter at all.
There is however another route, but its drastic and I don't know which country you live in , to see if you could get away with it legally (I'm in the US). It probably would work just about anywhere. I wish I would have done it with my son sometimes. But I learned of it years later. You would have to have balls of steal man to do it. But if keeping you daughter safe from the jws is important to you, because they WILL teach her that you are dead basically, then pm me. May need more content first though.
Conversely, I don't mind typing it out here if others want to know , that might be in a similar situation. Warning: its all kinds of messed up yet legal in the US at least. I lost my battle due to not knowing I could have done this , doesn't mean others have to lose theirs.
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Department Store Santa Claus - Do They Still Exist?
by RubaDub ini remember when stores would advertise that santa claus would be there from 2-4 pm on a saturday or something for several weeks before christmas.
you would see them everywhere.. do they still exist in your area?.
maybe parents finally realized that having a drunk guy with a white beard getting his jollies off with young children on his lap was not a good idea.. just my thoughts.
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caves
@sir82 - Love Cheech and Chong, Just found an old vinyl of C&C at a thrift shop for a buck last night. Anyone seen "The Corsican Brothers" by C&C? That's my favorite.