I went to drop him as a friend as soon as he sent me the message and he had beat me to it- LOL!
jeremiah18:5-10
JoinedPosts by jeremiah18:5-10
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22
Facebook message from ex brother-in-law
by jeremiah18:5-10 inmy ex bil (who is df'd for 3+ years) sent me this message saturday night:.
"...it is with a sad heart i write this.
after seeing your post concerning celebrating halloween and running into christi and her telling me that you guys were celebrating christmas with a tree and everything ... along with other postings you have made and testimony from others it is apparent you have chosen the path of apostasy.... i write this wishing that wasn't so but the fact is the fact... i wish you and your family the best in this system but i can not associate or be friends with you anymore... i am chosing to be on jehovah's and his organization's side... thanks for the friendship thru the years and may you enjoy the time left in this system... :'(".
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Facebook message from ex brother-in-law
by jeremiah18:5-10 inmy ex bil (who is df'd for 3+ years) sent me this message saturday night:.
"...it is with a sad heart i write this.
after seeing your post concerning celebrating halloween and running into christi and her telling me that you guys were celebrating christmas with a tree and everything ... along with other postings you have made and testimony from others it is apparent you have chosen the path of apostasy.... i write this wishing that wasn't so but the fact is the fact... i wish you and your family the best in this system but i can not associate or be friends with you anymore... i am chosing to be on jehovah's and his organization's side... thanks for the friendship thru the years and may you enjoy the time left in this system... :'(".
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jeremiah18:5-10
Thanks for the replies and feedback.
I think some of you touched on what really bothered me, the fact that he saw it necessary to reach out to me just to tell me that ha can't talk to me. I had not realized that is what upset me so much. What a stupid thing to do.
Oh well, nnot a peep out of him since my last reply. I think it all has to do with him trying to get reinstated. He's been trying for 2+ years and been turned down more than once. Guess ha thinks being facebook "friends" with someone like me can hurt his chances.
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Facebook message from ex brother-in-law
by jeremiah18:5-10 inmy ex bil (who is df'd for 3+ years) sent me this message saturday night:.
"...it is with a sad heart i write this.
after seeing your post concerning celebrating halloween and running into christi and her telling me that you guys were celebrating christmas with a tree and everything ... along with other postings you have made and testimony from others it is apparent you have chosen the path of apostasy.... i write this wishing that wasn't so but the fact is the fact... i wish you and your family the best in this system but i can not associate or be friends with you anymore... i am chosing to be on jehovah's and his organization's side... thanks for the friendship thru the years and may you enjoy the time left in this system... :'(".
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jeremiah18:5-10
I would appreciate any feedback about my responses. I didn't think it through and in the days since, I have somewhat regretted my agressive replies. Any suggestions on how to handle such a situation in the future would be appreciated, unless of course I handled it appropriately.
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Facebook message from ex brother-in-law
by jeremiah18:5-10 inmy ex bil (who is df'd for 3+ years) sent me this message saturday night:.
"...it is with a sad heart i write this.
after seeing your post concerning celebrating halloween and running into christi and her telling me that you guys were celebrating christmas with a tree and everything ... along with other postings you have made and testimony from others it is apparent you have chosen the path of apostasy.... i write this wishing that wasn't so but the fact is the fact... i wish you and your family the best in this system but i can not associate or be friends with you anymore... i am chosing to be on jehovah's and his organization's side... thanks for the friendship thru the years and may you enjoy the time left in this system... :'(".
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jeremiah18:5-10
To which I replied:
Im not going to waste anymore time on this beyond this reply.
But I have had zero contact with any of those people you mentioned. I choose to avoid contact with them. While they are "in laws" that doesn't grant them special insight into me or my life when I have no contact with them at all.
I've reviewed my lists and beyond stating that my kids enjoyed halloween night and having candy, I've posted nothing implying participation in any holiday or any other activity.
With that being said, you have no idea what I was referring to, whether we bought candy on special or simply enjoyed candy brought home from school.
Nevertheless, I don't care. I enjoy my life, my family, my choices, and my spirituality and course. That's what is of greatest consequence not whether you or anyone else approves of me or my supposed choices.
I have every right to make choices just as you do and to have such choices respected just as you desire yours to be.
Again what right do you have to presume to pass judgment on me?
You are severely misguided and unwelcome in my life, not that you've been a part of it for years anyway. So sad!!
How awful to be so pre-occupied with judging others and neglect your own life and enjoyment of said life.
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Facebook message from ex brother-in-law
by jeremiah18:5-10 inmy ex bil (who is df'd for 3+ years) sent me this message saturday night:.
"...it is with a sad heart i write this.
after seeing your post concerning celebrating halloween and running into christi and her telling me that you guys were celebrating christmas with a tree and everything ... along with other postings you have made and testimony from others it is apparent you have chosen the path of apostasy.... i write this wishing that wasn't so but the fact is the fact... i wish you and your family the best in this system but i can not associate or be friends with you anymore... i am chosing to be on jehovah's and his organization's side... thanks for the friendship thru the years and may you enjoy the time left in this system... :'(".
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jeremiah18:5-10
He replied:
I am sorry if you feel that I used gossip... but I did not... I saw your own posts and christi is your sister in law... as well as your inlaws to tell me these things... so its not just gossip or hearsay but people who know as well as your own words themself..so although you have chosen to go your path I am choosing to follow the organization.. call it what you will but I am ok with my decision
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22
Facebook message from ex brother-in-law
by jeremiah18:5-10 inmy ex bil (who is df'd for 3+ years) sent me this message saturday night:.
"...it is with a sad heart i write this.
after seeing your post concerning celebrating halloween and running into christi and her telling me that you guys were celebrating christmas with a tree and everything ... along with other postings you have made and testimony from others it is apparent you have chosen the path of apostasy.... i write this wishing that wasn't so but the fact is the fact... i wish you and your family the best in this system but i can not associate or be friends with you anymore... i am chosing to be on jehovah's and his organization's side... thanks for the friendship thru the years and may you enjoy the time left in this system... :'(".
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jeremiah18:5-10
Here is my reply:
How dare you presume to judge me or my family or anything about our life. You have had next to zero contact with me or my family in years.
You have zero right to imply adverse judgment or doom against me. Jehovah alone judges hearts and contrary to your post recently, no amount of action or belief can earn you Gods approval because as the Bible says salvation is by undeserved kindness and grace. Nothing you do can make you deserve it. You can self-proclaim taking "Jehovah's side" all you want, but that doesn't make it so. Just having a label by a self-appointed group of men does not equate to Jehovah's approval.
How dare you presume to accuse me of the path of "apostacy" when you no nothing of my belief in and faith in and dedication to Jehovah and Jesus. Apostacy from men is not apostacy from God. I pity you and all others who can't see beyond the noses on their faces or think for themselves beyond the realm allowed for them or permitted by an earthly organization.
My concern has been and will continue to be Gods approval and that of His Son, not of what you or any other man thinks. I don't know what "Christy" you ate referring to, but, I don't live in NWA and I don't have association with anyone where I live and what's more its not your concern or the concern of anyone in an organization that expelled me from it to look into my life, or take note of my life or actions.
For someone who has always been wick to alledge slander against anyone accusing you of anything, you have alot of audacity accusing me of anything based on secondhand info. Shame on you. I pray that someday your eyes are opened and that you can have enough life left to enjoy it.
You have no reason to reply to this. If you choose to share this private message with anyone I will consider it outright violation of my expectations of privacy. This is not a public forum.
Any inclinations you may have to argue with me in your legalistic manner can promptly be stowed away in the same sand you bury your head in. Peace and Good Luck! :-)
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Facebook message from ex brother-in-law
by jeremiah18:5-10 inmy ex bil (who is df'd for 3+ years) sent me this message saturday night:.
"...it is with a sad heart i write this.
after seeing your post concerning celebrating halloween and running into christi and her telling me that you guys were celebrating christmas with a tree and everything ... along with other postings you have made and testimony from others it is apparent you have chosen the path of apostasy.... i write this wishing that wasn't so but the fact is the fact... i wish you and your family the best in this system but i can not associate or be friends with you anymore... i am chosing to be on jehovah's and his organization's side... thanks for the friendship thru the years and may you enjoy the time left in this system... :'(".
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jeremiah18:5-10
My ex BIL (who is DF'd for 3+ years) sent me this message Saturday night:
"...it is with a sad heart I write this. After seeing your post concerning celebrating Halloween and running into Christi and her telling me that you guys were celebrating Christmas with a tree and everything ... along with other postings you have made and testimony from others it is apparent you have chosen the path of apostasy.... I write this wishing that wasn't so but the fact is the fact... I wish you and your family the best in this system but I can not associate or be friends with you anymore... I am chosing to be on Jehovah's and his organization's side... thanks for the friendship thru the years and may you enjoy the time left in this system... :'("
We used to be very close and served as elders on the body together for years. Beyond an occasional facebook message, we've had no contact for 5 years or so (since I was DF'd). When I received the message, it infuriated me and I couldn't resist responding.
There were 2 directions I could go, 1) rise above and be classy and not dignify his condescending nature or 2) emotionally reply and set him straight. I had been drinking that night with a couple of buddies and couldn't resist the emotional reply.
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more abuse in today's watchtower study
by solomon intoday's study picks on the most vulnerable among us.
the mentally ill. .
the watchtower apparently hasn't learned that depression and mental illness are that a medical condition.
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jeremiah18:5-10
Not all cases of depression are due to "chemical imbalances" are they? Some depression can be environmantal, in other words a result of situations and circumstances you are contending with on a day-to-day basis.
In either case, what causes or brings on the depression is not as clear as the effect of the depression.
My wife, after the birth of our second child, began experiencing more intense depression. For years we had viewed each other as being one of us pessimistic (her) and the other optimistic (me) and that this was why we dealt with situations differently. We even considered it Jehovah's "blessing" that we were this way and were together so we could balance each other. Looking back on this now makes me embarrassed that I ever thought this way. In any case my approach to my wife was as follows (and IMO identifies a root problem in the common approach to depression by many)
I would note that my wife was apathetic, unproductive, irritable, and lacked motivation. So I would be "sensitive" and ask her "What's wrong?"
My wife would reply, "I don't know." I would then, in my infinite wisdom, begin a long, drawn out conversation breaking down everything that's been going on and agonizingly drag her thru each event over the last several days thinking at some point I would be able to isolate a specific thing and be able to proclaim "Aha! that's what it is" bada-bing bada-boom, your fixed!
Of course this didn't work, it only served to create more tension and add to the already gloomy situation.
The problem really is that a person, when depressed (whether clinical or environmental) cannot think straight. They don't have the ability to pause, rewind, isolate, and solve. To ask them to do so is ridiculous. They lack energy, drive, stamina, motivation, and joy. They simply cannot bring themselves to do things like read the Bible, go to meetings, pray, exercise, etc. They may have moments where they feel better and are able to do some of these things, but by and large, they simply can't sustain it. They need help to be able to regain perspective, focus, and in many cases this help can only come in the form of presribed drugs/meds, combined with QUALIFIED assistance from a TRAINED PROFESSIONAL.
A person that hasn't experienced depression beyond momentary "down" feelings of disappointment, cannot comprehend what a depressed person is going through. It's not momentary for them. It's not disappointment for them. It is real and it is debillitating mentally and physically. I learned this through experience and effort to never forget it. No amaount of mental effort on the part of the depressed person can "solve" it. They may never "solve" it. Thhey may learn to live with it, but usually it is only because of getting the proper assistance from "QUALIFIED" resources.
Something that helped me to understand it better was thinking of the "depressing" of a brake pedal. To depress the brakes, one applies pressure to the pedal and forces it down and maintains the pressure until coming to a stop. The pedal is "depressed". The pedal has no say over it, it only receives the pressure and goes down and stays down. A depressed person is pressed down by pressure from an outside source (whether environmental or chemical) beyond their control and they have little to no say over the source of pressure of the effect. They simply must cave under it and must wit for the pressure to subside (due to qualified assistance).
I truly feel the WTS and their cronies try to equate disappointment to depression and that is a fundamental flaw in their approach and their presribed solution. Reading the Bible, praying, meeting attendance may very well help a JW experiencing disappointment, but it has little to do with assisting a depressed soul.
Jer
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RBC biggie divulges WTS expects disaster victims helped by RBC volunteers to fork over insurance money to the WTS
by oppostate inmy wife spent all morning long preparing this super thanksgiving banquet.
with a huge turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, cranberry sauce.
and greenbeen salad, pie and icecream.. yummy!.
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jeremiah18:5-10
What bothers me most about it is they portray this differently, or at least did when I was still in 5 years ago. There was never a mention of the WTS being re-imbursed from insurance funds. They made it out to be 100% donation/charity/goodwill work. Never was it even implied that any financial return from the insured was expected or received. That bothers me greatly. Perhaps that has changed in the last 5 years. If they are up front about it and disclose this detail, then fine, I have no problem with it. Deceit doesn't sit well with me, but its par for the course for the WTS!!
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RBC biggie divulges WTS expects disaster victims helped by RBC volunteers to fork over insurance money to the WTS
by oppostate inmy wife spent all morning long preparing this super thanksgiving banquet.
with a huge turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, cranberry sauce.
and greenbeen salad, pie and icecream.. yummy!.
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jeremiah18:5-10
I was a babtized member for 20 years, a pioneer for 10 of those years and an elder for 5+. I worked on RBC for 3+ years and I had no clue about this. Dunno if I just missed this or was just so naive that the thought of this never even entered my mind. It's actually quite shocking to me because, as mentioned already, there's the WWW contributions, KH construction contribution, then when a disaster strikes, each cong gets a letter and a motion is passed to make a special donation of $$$ and clothing and other goods. This is startlingly obvious embezzlement and fraud. I can't believe how much JW's just dont see and don't want to see. Another thread related how an elder kept telling this inactive brother that he has his head "buried in the sand", I gotta say, I feel like I was the one with my head in the sand all those years, not just the sand, but the kitty litter box. HOW DARE THEY!!!!