Xanthippe

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Posts by Xanthippe

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  7

  Cult memories extinguish good memories

  by rebel8 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have this thing.

  i don't know why it is or how to stop it.

  every time i happen to daydream about something positive from my childhood, some related cult aspect comes to mind and extinguishes it like a candle is being blown out.. for a while, i thought this was anger and resentment causing me to want to find an excuse to be angry (not that i need one).

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  Xanthippe

  As you know neurons become linked together like train tracks and if we start down a certain memory it can take us to all aspects of that person, place or event. Also our strongest memories are linked to emotion. Which is why unfortunately we remember negative things more often if they evoke the strongest memories. That's why a happy childhood is the greatest gift.

  I find the same problem as you, I feel my brain's been wired up wrong. When I'm feeling really great negative memories intrude and can bring me down. The only thing that works for me is saying it's just the machine that's faulty it's not my whole life. I try and live in the now, I had a crap childhood, that's it.

  Would CBT work for you perhaps? I know someone who found it helpful for anxiety. The idea of it is to change mental habits.
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  61

  Did others experience this on the ministry or among JWs generally?

  by slimboyfat in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  sometimes it's hard to know if our own experience of jws was typical and what features were peculiar to our own area or the individual jws we knew personally.

  i was wondering if others experienced this among jws:.

  a few times on the ministry, when we were working wealthy areas with large houses, some brothers and sisters would make the comment that they look forward to taking ownership of one of these big houses after armageddon, when the worldly people have vacated them.

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  Xanthippe

  There was always a lot of envy when working in nice affluent areas. Comments like, 'they've got their paradise now, they won't listen to us'.

  Contrast this to a manager I worked for after I left who would talk about a beautiful house in the town she would love to buy, but she and her husband had both been working hard for years to save for it if it ever came up for sale. Difference between dreamers and realists.
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  21

  G Losch Talk - Do Not Hold a Grudge

  by Listener in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  a new video on jw org tv titled do not hold a grudge is presented by gb's oldest member gerrit losch.this is just another representation of the standard of talks prepared and given by the highest level of authority and position within the jw organization.

  they desperately need help, not even their complete rebranding can save them from themselves.some of this gb member's gems about holding a grudge include -.

  - what can lead to a grudge?

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  Xanthippe

  Insufferable hypocrisy! From a religion that insists people 'give the silent treatment' to family members who happen to believe something different to them. I truly believe my family have shunned me for twenty-seven years because they hold a grudge against me for daring to shake their faith by leaving their religion. The GB not only condone grudge holding, they encourage and applaud the immature inclination towards this behaviour. Yes you're so right the organisation sees shunning as a form of punishment, not an act of love at all!
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  95

  slimboyfat joins the Mormons!

  by slimboyfat in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i know that some people on the board have experience of being mormons, so i would be interested in your feedback.

  at church this afternoon it was an uncanny experience.

  in the past i've read a lot about mormons, so i thought i was prepared in general for what it would be like.

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  Xanthippe

  I forgot to mention another thing they do is they use early modern English, or mainly just thee and thou instead of you. They do this in all aspects of the service: prayers, hymns, and even during sermons.

  Probably because the Book of Mormon contains huge chunks copied straight out of the AV Bible (King James). Which is why Joseph Smith wrote a book in seventeenth century English in the nineteenth century. I found this out myself when two Mormons called and left us the Book Of Mormon asking us to read 13 pages before they returned. It was years ago but I believe it was Moroni that I read. I thought it sounded familiar and sure enough it's pages and pages from John in the AV, either the gospel or letters, I forget now.
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  25

  Why do people need religion in this century?

  by sweetgrass in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i think people need religion because of fear.

  fear of death and what will happen at death if they have been good or bad.

  people say it gives them hope but is this not born too out of fear of not seeing dead loved ones again, or having a better life in the afterlife?

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  Xanthippe

  sweetgrass4 hours ago - I think people need religion because of fear. Fear of death and what will happen at death if they have been good or bad. People say it gives them hope but is this not born too out of fear of not seeing dead loved ones again, or having a better life in the afterlife? If they don't accept religion they fear they might miss out?

  
  Yes you're right fear of death and wondering about life after death has conned people into joining religions to book their place. Nobody knows for sure if there's anything after death but if, for example, consciousness has evolved to continue, then religion and God have nothing to do with it and uselessly appeasing a deity has held people captive to religions for millennia.
  

  I also think people seek meaning in life and helping others and trying to make a difference in the world can give meaning but as you say why in this century do we need religion for that? Plenty of secular organisations are digging wells, giving aid in war zones and helping people work their way out of poverty etc,. Why join religions for that when we simply need to set up a direct debit or volunteer our time? More productive than getting up early on Sunday and begging a nonexistent being to help the world.
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  135

  I've been found out!

  by pale.emperor in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  well, thats it folks.. my identity on here has been rumbled and reported to the elders.

  someone, somehow, has figured out that im a member of this site and - rather than speak to me - has promptly reported me to the elders.

  i just feel sad for my daughter.

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  Xanthippe

  I'm sorry for your baby girl.
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  10

  My wife blew my mind, Seth Andrews, and more....

  by pronomono in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  so i recently had the opportunity to hear seth andrews speak in person at a local unitarian universalist church.

  for those of you who know my past, i've had a bit of a difficult time dealing with the emotional aspects of a fade with a wife that says she believes but doesn't put forth the works that demonstrate that faith.

  we've kind of been in a rocky point in our relationship because we've both been afraid to test the waters on where each of us stand.

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  Xanthippe

  Fantastic news Pronomono. You were very brave to go to that talk at a church and talk to your wife about it and the convention bunker vids and it paid off!
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  19

  Disfellowshipped ex-wife Dies - Now What?

  by snugglebunny in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  it was a shock despite us being divorced for over 40 years.

  my son from that marriage phoned me with the news of sandra's death a couple of days ago, followed by my daughter.. sandra was one of 5 siblings.

  the other 4 are still jw's.

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  Xanthippe

  My condolences to you Snugglebunny. How sad that her JW family won't be there. Just speechless at these people.
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  95

  slimboyfat joins the Mormons!

  by slimboyfat in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i know that some people on the board have experience of being mormons, so i would be interested in your feedback.

  at church this afternoon it was an uncanny experience.

  in the past i've read a lot about mormons, so i thought i was prepared in general for what it would be like.

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  Xanthippe

  But you've got to wonder how they were told by the prophet in 1980 not to follow along with the Book of Mormon in church. Who's getting channelled messages? Isn't that weird SBF? My mother's sister married a Mormon. When he died he was buried with his first wife because they are sealed or something to spend eternity together. That together with the huge LDS genealogy database so they can baptise the dead by proxy are just some of the odd teachings.
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  22

  New to JWD, Hello!

  by jwundubbed in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my story in a nutshell... .

  scientist for a father; extremely mentally ill, 'annointed' mother.

  was privy to and also suffered a lot of abuse.

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  Xanthippe

  Welcome undub, I'm looking forward to hearing more from you. You nearly became 'undue', my iPad has a mind of its own. 😀