Xanthippe

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Posts by Xanthippe

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  25

  Is disassociating worth the hassle?

  by HereIgo in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have been out now for 6 years but lately i have been giving some thought to da.

  i just kind of feel that chapter in my life is still open and for some reason i feel like da'ing might close that chapter but i'm not entirely sure.

  im not df either, when i left i basically faded and disappeared.

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  Xanthippe

  My husband and I sent a letter of resignation not of disassociation to the congregation, although in their eyes it's the same of course but it made us feel we were playing by our rules.

  It was the right thing for us. We were so messed up by pioneering for years and my husband being a MS then an elder we needed a clean break to get our life back together and get our health back. As others have said we didn't know about fading back then.

  Do what's right for you. If you dont want JWs bothering you to go back and you aren't afraid of losing family and friends it's a way to be free and clear.
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  23

  The Debate Is Over...

  by JW_Rogue in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  for years theologians and historians have researched who the historical person known as jesus was and how much of the biblical account could be verified.

  countless books have been written going into great detail.

  this has been a controversial subject with some even claiming that jesus never existed.

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  Xanthippe

  Phew when you put this topic of whether Jesus existed under personal experiences and reunions I thought you were about to declare your divinity.
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  21

  Attending a same-sex wedding

  by Samantharockeby33 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  my cousin, whom is not jw, but we have grown up together our whole lives has just gotten engaged to her same sex partner, i am very conflicted on wether i can/should attend the wedding or not.

  i am very close with my cousin and her partner and they are very understanding to our beliefs and differences as she grew up with our whole family being jw.

  some family members have already said they will definitely be attending and some definitely not attending so i just want some extra advice and guidance!

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  Xanthippe

  Sam isn't there any information about attending a nonJW relative's wedding? There used to be I remember because people wondered about attending it in a church. I thought it was a conscience matter. My mother attended weddings and funerals of nonJW relatives, most of them in churches.

  Couldn't you reason with your parents if the JWs say it's a conscience matter to do that when the teachings in that church are different, when they may believe in premarital sex and may even be marrying after they already have children then why not your situation.
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  21

  Attending a same-sex wedding

  by Samantharockeby33 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  my cousin, whom is not jw, but we have grown up together our whole lives has just gotten engaged to her same sex partner, i am very conflicted on wether i can/should attend the wedding or not.

  i am very close with my cousin and her partner and they are very understanding to our beliefs and differences as she grew up with our whole family being jw.

  some family members have already said they will definitely be attending and some definitely not attending so i just want some extra advice and guidance!

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  Xanthippe

  Go and celebrate their love and new life together. And when you stop caring what other people think about you, you will start a new phase of your life, having the freedom to live the way you decide is right. Enjoy the wedding!
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  17

  A religion or OCPD?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i came across this paragraph about the causes of ocpd and it occurred to me that jws as a religion do reward ocpd traits.

  they insist you adhere to rules and behaviours to the impairment of social and family activities.

  perfectionism, strict moral code, lack of generosity.. so does this religion cause this personality disorder or does it recruit people who suffer from it?.

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  Xanthippe

  A key feature of OCPD is that the person often thinks their way of doing things is morally right, rather than just a good idea. If you have a religion that tells you perfection is the ultimate aim, that one day we will all be perfect, this surely sounds like pure happiness for someone with OCPD. Even though the idea of perfection is nonsensical and utterly impossible to explain.
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  17

  A religion or OCPD?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i came across this paragraph about the causes of ocpd and it occurred to me that jws as a religion do reward ocpd traits.

  they insist you adhere to rules and behaviours to the impairment of social and family activities.

  perfectionism, strict moral code, lack of generosity.. so does this religion cause this personality disorder or does it recruit people who suffer from it?.

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  Xanthippe

  Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is different to Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder, Fukitol. There is a great deal of information about them online. When you have read about both I would be interested in your thoughts
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  17

  A religion or OCPD?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i came across this paragraph about the causes of ocpd and it occurred to me that jws as a religion do reward ocpd traits.

  they insist you adhere to rules and behaviours to the impairment of social and family activities.

  perfectionism, strict moral code, lack of generosity.. so does this religion cause this personality disorder or does it recruit people who suffer from it?.

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  Xanthippe

  Both disorders seem to be about behaviours and rules that make people feel safe in an unsafe world. Which strongly reminds me of religions, isn't that what they're all about?
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  17

  A religion or OCPD?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i came across this paragraph about the causes of ocpd and it occurred to me that jws as a religion do reward ocpd traits.

  they insist you adhere to rules and behaviours to the impairment of social and family activities.

  perfectionism, strict moral code, lack of generosity.. so does this religion cause this personality disorder or does it recruit people who suffer from it?.

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  Xanthippe

  Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder, Fukitol.
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  17

  A religion or OCPD?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i came across this paragraph about the causes of ocpd and it occurred to me that jws as a religion do reward ocpd traits.

  they insist you adhere to rules and behaviours to the impairment of social and family activities.

  perfectionism, strict moral code, lack of generosity.. so does this religion cause this personality disorder or does it recruit people who suffer from it?.

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  Xanthippe

  1. I came across this paragraph about the causes of OCPD and it occurred to me that JWs as a religion do reward OCPD traits. They insist you adhere to rules and behaviours to the impairment of social and family activities. Perfectionism, strict moral code, lack of generosity.

     So does this religion cause this personality disorder or does it recruit people who suffer from it?

     By the way I disagree with the conclusion of the paragraph, I think all rule-bound societies are dysfunctional.

     • Cultural factors may play a role. Societies or religions that are very authoritarian and bound by strict rules may impact early childhood development that affects personality expression. A word of caution: not all rule-bound societies are dysfunctional and OCPD traits may in fact be rewarded within that specific cultural or religious context.
       

     
     

     What are the symptoms of OCPD?
     

  • Excessive devotion to work that impairs social and family activities

  • Excessive fixation with lists, rules and minor details

  • Perfectionism that interferes with finishing tasks

  • Rigid following of moral and ethical codes

  • Unwillingness to assign tasks unless others perform exactly as asked

  • Lack of generosity; extreme frugality without reason

  • Hoarding behaviors

    https://iocdf.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/OCPD-Fact-Sheet.pdf
    
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  150

  Start A Butterfly Garden!

  by Bonsai in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  time to take a break from debating religion.

  take in a breath of fresh air and be healed by the wonders of nature around you.. how many of you have a garden?

  how many have a nice flower patch to go with your vegetable garden?

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  Xanthippe

  I've barely seen a butterfly either this year. We can't keep spraying insecticides all over out fields and gardens and not damage butterflies and bees.

  Also it's frustrating that we are being indoctrinated to believe our gardens must be weed free at all times, so get on down to the shop and buy another bottle of poison. Whatever happened to weeding paths slowly? If we kill all the bees we are going to be in serious trouble on this planet.