Xanthippe

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Posts by Xanthippe

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  20

  Don't Try to Choose Your Beliefs

  by cofty in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  beliefs are not things to be chosen like new clothes; authentic beliefs happen to us without our conscious attention.. i have often seen comments from ex-jws to the effect that they are now unsure about what they 'ought' to believe.

  others express offense when their chosen beliefs are challenged and well-meaning bystanders protest that everybody is entitled to believe whatever they wish.

  this misunderstanding of what it means to believe something is unhelpful.. it's natural to want to quickly replace our old beliefs when our worldview has collapsed around us.

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  Xanthippe

  It's true you don't need to choose beliefs. If you keep reading and exploring new ideas after you leave the religion then beliefs will be the things that fall between the facts that you are absolutely sure of, things that are scientifically proven beyond reasonable doubt for example. Beliefs will be the things that you can see a lot of evidence for and that fit your world model so far but you are not 100% sure of yet.
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  21

  9 days to go

  by Jrjw in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  9 days to go until i hand my d'a letter in.

  its extremely short, as in one sentence long.

  i'm not giving them a reason coz i don't need to coz it's my life and my choice and i don't have to answer to the boe or gb.

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  Xanthippe

  I'm glad Jrjw, I know you wanted to do that and be free from harassment. That letter is telling them to get lost! Welcome to your new life xx
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  315

  Pillowgate - John Cedars

  by CitizenofEarth in

  1. social
  2. humour

  is this true?

  is this really true?!.

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qirjv48c55m.

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  Xanthippe

  So the story of Samson positioning himself between the pillows and pushing hard was just a euphemism then?
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  28

  What was your trigger to waking up ?

  by CovertsadJW in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  good afternoon , .

  i wanted to ask everyone here , what was your trigger to waking up ?

  i have been waking up for a long time , but in looking back it’s hard for me to look at one event and say “ ah ha “ , i think mine is like a slow leak - like a crack in a damn - and then hold on , because after that it’s just a flood of information.

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  Xanthippe

  then I realized I have been threatened with death my whole life - My dads thought - well don’t let your emetions control you.

  Typical mind-control comment that your dad's learned from the cult. You complain about emotional blackmail and he says stop being emotional. They've trained him well.

  It was a slow drip of things for me too with the religion. My husband's old pioneer partner admitting fornication then being fast-tracked to being an elder. My brother-in-law being removed as an elder for stealing, moving away then being made an elder again in about a year. Being told not to study just the Bible with people. The lack of love.The shunning of people congregation member just didn't like. The hatred of science, etc.
  
  
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  9

  Crazy JW Comments On AvoidJW.org

  by AverageJoe1 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i read john redwood’s excellent article on avoidjw.org but what was even more mind blowing for me was all the jw comments via disqus at the end of the article:.

  http://avoidjw.org/en/news/problems-facing-jw-org/.

  they are all the typical lashing out comments based on emotion rather than logical reasoning along with the watchtower apologists thrown in for good measure.. if any of you have a disqus account, then i’d encourage you to have your say.

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  Xanthippe

  I love that the site administrator criticises your comments Joe and then tells everyone to look on jw.borg! He says it twice 😀
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  27

  "Go and tell someone who cares...I dont care!"

  by stuckinarut2 in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  i don't usually like the confrontational approach to those on the carts, however this video is a great example of how jws do not really care about child abuse issues!.

  the arrogance of this brother is disturbing..... bear with the video.

  it gets really interesting around the 6 min mark, where the brother loses his cool.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5chulnnyqs.

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  Xanthippe

  'What's your point?' 'Tell someone who cares'

  Ignorance and lack of compassion for children.

  I agree he should have wound it up sooner and got Jackson's name right but honestly these people stand around shop entrances and public places and then accuse someone asking them questions of harassment!
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  63

  Sister may have had a slight heart attack, do I text her?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so my cousin phoned and told me my jw sister was taken to hospital with chest pains and it may have been a slight heart attack or possibly she's starting with angina.

  now as some of you know my sisters and brother have had little to do with me for 29 years.

  we've met at funerals, or arranged them, but i just thought today what if she did die?

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  Xanthippe

  That said, we could also increase our vulnerability in return to still-in JWs indifference and negativity towards us. In that regard, we need to weigh up how we will react or feel if we reach out in sincerity and our approach is rebuffed. - Steve2

  Well of course! That's what this whole thread has been about! I have been weighing everything up and trying not to increase the pain I have already received whilst wanting to reach out in sincerity. All I got from you was, don't act like you're morally better than your sister.

  Talk about teaching your grandmother to suck eggs. I've been thinking recently about having more councelling but honestly if this is all therapists have to offer I think I'll keep my £50 an hour. The guys on here, with no professional training have helped me enormously.
  
  
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  63

  Sister may have had a slight heart attack, do I text her?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so my cousin phoned and told me my jw sister was taken to hospital with chest pains and it may have been a slight heart attack or possibly she's starting with angina.

  now as some of you know my sisters and brother have had little to do with me for 29 years.

  we've met at funerals, or arranged them, but i just thought today what if she did die?

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  Xanthippe

  Thanks everyone, I sent a text about an hour ago. I decided to be a normal caring sister and not play by their rules. Whatever happens happens. After all this time out I can take it. Thanks for all your help.
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  63

  Sister may have had a slight heart attack, do I text her?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so my cousin phoned and told me my jw sister was taken to hospital with chest pains and it may have been a slight heart attack or possibly she's starting with angina.

  now as some of you know my sisters and brother have had little to do with me for 29 years.

  we've met at funerals, or arranged them, but i just thought today what if she did die?

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  Xanthippe

  Thanks for your kind thoughts about me jp, l won't let her attitude define me. Just let her know I care, nothing more, nothing less. Yes that's what I'd like to do.

  Steve2 I'm really not trying to prove I'm morally better than my sister. I have just become so confused over the years as to how to treat people wrapped up in this cult that I am asking the guys on here for help. To explain the situation you have to give a little back story, I'm not keeping a ledger. Memory is tied up with emotion and hurtful things just stay in our memory, it's not intentional. It is normal to care about people you share parents with, people you spent your childhood with. Why don't you as a mental health professional know these things?

  Pete, thanks, I like your idea to show that you didn't realise you're being shunned and just act normally. Yes that must really confuse them. Good idea to send a card. You and jp have both suggested that. I'll think about that.

  Crazyguy, why act like I exist? Because I do!!
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  63

  Sister may have had a slight heart attack, do I text her?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so my cousin phoned and told me my jw sister was taken to hospital with chest pains and it may have been a slight heart attack or possibly she's starting with angina.

  now as some of you know my sisters and brother have had little to do with me for 29 years.

  we've met at funerals, or arranged them, but i just thought today what if she did die?

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  Xanthippe

  Giordano, CoCo, westiebilly, flipper and ding, thanks for your thoughts. I have always believed it would be a better world if only everyone just looked after their own family. Unfortunately with the JW cult mindset that whole dynamic changes, I wish it wasn't so hard. Doing what was right for me and my daughter I hoped was right for them too. I tried to make them see that I did nothing wrong by leaving my religion and therefore would not except their treatment as punishment.

  Rebel8 I hear you. I've done the same as you, stopped chasing a relationship with them. You have to protect yourself against abusive people in this world, I totally agree.

  Shirley just go with my heart, I like that.

  Scotsman thanks for your experience and advice.

  Muddy Waters it's good to come from a place of compassion and have no regrets I agree, thank you.

  Myelaine we haven't spoken on the phone for nine years, I don't want to put myself through the stress of that, but thanks for your reply.

  Thanks Fink, I've got a lot to think about now.