Brilliant programme! Thanks for the link.
Xanthippe
JoinedPosts by Xanthippe
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6
Victoria Derbyshire TV show on shunning - video link
by Isambard Crater inhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hyzbjz8x9y4.
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19
Ran into my brother at a concert; first time I've seen him in years......
by dubstepped inmy wife and i went to a concert on friday night.
there was a friend of ours there doing security, and she happens to be an exjw too.
she sent me a message on messenger to inform me that my brother and his wife were at the show, not knowing that i'd be there too.
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Xanthippe
Her smiling face was the first thing we saw, and we talked to her about normal things for a minute. Then I saw another new friend of ours coming up the aisle toward us, and he stopped and talked to us. It was so interesting, like the universe said "here are your real friends" immediately after this experience. It felt good.
I love that real friends made up for your brother's weirdness. Last night I missed my daughter being at open air Shakespeare with me. She usually comes with me but she had to go back to uni to finish her masters and go to job interviews. No family to go with, same position as you, so I went with a new friend from my Meetup group. She produced a bottle of wine and two glasses and I felt ..... loved.
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To Fade or Disassociate
by Jules Saturn inhello to all, so i did want to talk about this topic because i think it is very important to me.
i have a grandfather who faded several decades ago.
he occasionally attends an assembly and the memorial but no longer attends meetings or goes on field service.
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Xanthippe
Hi Jules, when my husband and I left we believed the JWs had been the true religion but had become corrupt like ancient Israel. So at the time we thought the right thing to do was disassociate and try and find the 'truth'. Sometimes I've regretted it because I lost all my family and we lost all our friends.
However it was a clean break for us, we started a new life. We both studied for distance learning degrees, got proper jobs, bought a little house, had a child. There's a lot to be said for starting again. It cleared our minds and allowed us to read whatever we wanted and do whatever we liked. Nobody was breathing down our necks, judging everything we did because they didn't know. Nor were they trying to get us to return and confusing us with love bombing.
My family have shown themselves to be very mentally unhealthy because even though we made it quite plain we're never going back and we no longer believe in any religion or try and preach at them they still insist on treating me and my daughter as lepers. It's been twenty-eight years. So whatever my early religious life had been I would have had to find some distance from them eventually because they are so screwed up.
Your grandfather, on the other hand, sounds like a very mentally healthy person, leaving because the religion tried to make him put strangers before family. He's a really together person who recognises cult speak when he hears it. I'm glad you have him as support if all else fails with your parents.
I'm not telling you to disassociate by the way, just answering your question with my personal experience as you asked.
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31
Hello
by Jules Saturn inhello, i've been lurking for quite some time here on this forum, reading a whole lot and i've finally made the courage to create an account as a form of escape and in hopes to be understood and not feel "mentally diseased".
little background on me, i am a born in but i consider myself a pimo (physically in mentally out).
i feel like i've always had doubts but these doubts would sink with the meetings and the assemblies and every other little thing that drowns any doubts a witness may have.
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Xanthippe
Hi Jules welcome to the forum. It's tough I know reading all this new information but take your time and above all don't talk to JW family about it yet. I know it's a lot to take in but you will survive and you have a great future ahead of you. Come here and talk about all of your thoughts and the great people here will do their best to help.
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21
New Kingdom Halls in Strip Malls & Real Estate Listings
by 4thgen ini met with a jw today and they showed me a picture of the new style kh build.
the building was located in a ***strip mall**** in florida.
i'm always amazed (and disgusted) at the new and inventive ways they think of expanding their real estate holdings.. along that vein...i recently discovered this: .
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Xanthippe
Yeah Joe I was a little culture shocked there for a while 😜
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New Kingdom Halls in Strip Malls & Real Estate Listings
by 4thgen ini met with a jw today and they showed me a picture of the new style kh build.
the building was located in a ***strip mall**** in florida.
i'm always amazed (and disgusted) at the new and inventive ways they think of expanding their real estate holdings.. along that vein...i recently discovered this: .
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Xanthippe
Okay so now I've googled it and found out the KH you're talking about is not in a red light district full of strippers but in a shopping centre!
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10 years on.....
by snare&racket ini was a window cleaner, i was at the time unemployed, homeless.
i had no education to be proud of (high school one a two b's rest c's) i was a jehovahs witness.
i had been a pioneer.
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Xanthippe
I'm so glad you're happy S&R. Really pleased that you're respected as a doctor and you have great friends and a wonderful relationship. I also am overjoyed that a well-educated person like you has the world view where it's okay to say 'we dont know'.
You've always come across as a very humble sincere person so good luck in your life and thanks for your inspirational story.
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Do I have to believe in Jesus to be saved?
by unsure indo i have to believe in jesus to be saved?.
i was raised as a jehovah's witness.
i was born in.
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Xanthippe
Is there something wrong with listening to both sides?
Nothing at all wrong with that. I like your questions and am interested to hear believer's responses too. There are a few on this forum.
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149
why jw's commit suicide?
by notalone inwe all know the rate of suicide is high among jw's.
my question is this- was there some subliminal messages that encourage this.
i was a born in and my entire life i would have these thoughts that could come out of nowhere,"kill yourself.
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Xanthippe
I think, as someone who had clinical depression in that religion in my twenties, that the teachings makes you feel everything is pointless.
Hobbies are pointless - you should be doing more on FS instead. Travel is pointless, 'we can do that in the new system'. Learning a musical instrument is pointless, 'we can do that in .........
Going to the gym, 'physical exercise is beneficial for a little but Godly devotion' yadda, yadda.
Volunteering or giving to charity - 'you have the poor always with you' and big J will sort out poverty and suffering - any day now!
Reading for pleasure or self education is pointless, 'to the making of many books there is no end and much devotion to them is wearisome to the soul'.
It's nearly thirty years since I read the Bible or a WTS book but this nonsense remains in my memory. This cult destroys our joy in life. They rubbish everything that gives any pleasure to human existence. I had the phrase 'what's the point?' in my head for many years notalone. Can you wonder that people take their own lives?
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I'm giving up in 2017! (More steps in my fading)
by Skepsis inwhen i joined this site at the beginning of this year, i was serving as an uber-zealous regular pioneer and ms in a foreign congregation where the need is greater.
i was giving public talks and having parts at regional conventions.
had started to have doubts but i hadn't time to focus on them, i simply was overcharged with so many activities and things to do.. i started by quitting pioneering but couldn't think i would give further steps for a long time.
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Xanthippe
Well done Skepsis, hope you are doing okay missing friends today. Do something fun and take your mind off it all. You deserve it.