Hi HBF, I was born in, out for most of my adult life as my wife is a "worldly" woman, LOL. I was an apologist for a long time and still mentally hanging on by a toe nail til a few years ago I attended the funeral of a worldly Aunt with my aged parents. My Father's total insensitivity to and lack of comprehension about the whole grieving process and trying to vindicate the Society because in his mind said Aunt had died from a blood transfusion (not true) made me mad as hell. Took a deep dive into EXjw world, learned a hell of a lot, became a non-believer and lost all my silly fears and bad dreams. Never felt better.
Peace and happiness to you.