... I dunno, maybe i'll change again and be militant anti JW.
Please don't.
as the title says, i spoke to two sisters at a witnessing cart today.
i didnt approach them, as circumstances would have it i was out in liverpool city center with my 3yo and she was carrying a teddy and a balloon.
she caught the balloon on something sharp and it popped and so she started crying.
... I dunno, maybe i'll change again and be militant anti JW.
Please don't.
i am interested in finding out how you view yourself.
are really you when it comes to every day interactions....ie when at work, with family or friends, or if attending meetings?.
if still attending, do you feel you are not the real you at meetings?
Are really YOU when it comes to every day interactions....ie when at work, with family or friends, or if attending meetings?
I don't attend JW meetings, but at work and everywhere I go I am definitely me. I'm sure that if I create a different account and start posting, many people here will know that it's still me.
In regards to faders and ex witnesses, do you feel you are still not really you when in company with relatives or friends who are witnesses?
Not at all. One of the main reasons I was able to send the WT and the idiots at my last congregation to the carajo was precisely that I had to choose between making them feel comfortable or being myself. With my JW family, they all know well who/how I am. That's part of the reason some members of my family don't bother talking to me.
Do you feel you are holding back all the time?
No, but that doesn't mean that I am insensitive, or that I'm not tactful. You can be yourself and still be considerate to what your JW family believes and feels, even if that's not reciprocated, especially if you are aware that it will not be reciprocated. That will be great, but being a respectful human being (if you are in fact a respectful person) doesn't mean that their brainwashing and the behavior they are conditioned to reflect will change. It only means that you are you, a respectful person.
Now, please keep in mind that i have been out for decades and have taken plenty of time to mature and know myself really well. It's important to know yourself first before, well, being yourself.
Interesting post.
my spouse and i have faded 4+ years ago.
we know the jw rumor mill has gotten back to our family that we no longer attend.
most of our family is out of state.
We are not complaining about it (actually it is a great thing), just perplexed. Has anyone else had this happen? If so, what do you think their thought process is? Are they burying their heads in the sand, do they have doubts to but can't discuss them? They don't want to know and don't want to have to choose to not associate with us? Are they just trying to keep us close because they are getting older? We are just curious if any of you have experienced this same thing? If so, what are your thoughts?
Heck, yes! My thoughts and experience are that they will not ask any questions, they will not inquire anything about you around the JWs, and they will never ever directly tell you anything.
A few things can be the reasons.
Possibility 1 - The elders instructed them to do that. Some elders (duh, they are just people with nothing better to do) use their position to screen out people that they don't like. If you rubbed some elder the wrong way, chances are that elder is very happy with recommending that course of action to your JW family.
Possibility 2 - They are very afraid of opening a can of worms. Like some members of my JW family, they love to know about me, they claim that they "don't know why I don't contact them", and "they want me in their lives",but they don't want to know anything that I can say that challenges them, their lives or their believes. That's out of fear of realizing that they have been wrong all their lives. That's no small thing. The implications of that means that so many decisions they have made have been made for the wrong reasons and with the wrong information, and based on the wrong premises.
Possibility 3 - Pride, dysfunction, envy, control, and similar harmful-to-relationships negativity. They just want the fun part of you; they have no interest in having a relationship with you or learning anything about you as a person. So they are nice and polite and attempt to get what they want from you, but can't care less about you. Being in contact with you is a way of keeping tabs, so they can continue with gossiping and rumors.
Possibility 4 - Good old fashion brainwashing. They may believe that doing that is the right things to do as per their Jehovah.
Even if they call you, they want you to ask things, so they feel at a psychological advantage over you. They have no interest in what you have to say, but they want you to ask so they can tell you what they want to say. Don't expect any reasonable, normal dialog. That doesn't happen with active, devoted JWs.
I keep close to my father, my mother passed away last year. I cater their need the best I can. As for my siblings, I have different degrees of contact with them and no contact with some.
this is obviously a question for the older generation.
i'm really curious what it was like to be a witness in the 60's and 70's?.
was the society as strict as it is today?.
Was the society as strict as it is today?
Did you feel proud to be a JW back then?
Were the brothers more loving in those days?
Just wanted to hear some experiences to compare with the way things are today
My perception is one of a child (I was a child in the 70s), so I'm not sure how accurate it is.
Also, even at a tender age I did notice a difference in culture between congregations I was in a downtown congregation since I was born and then moved to a rural area when I was about 9. The culture was different, the way JWs got along with each other was different too. The second congregation was more family oriented as there were about 6 or 7 large families.
We were treated like crap. In every meeting there was some kind of information about how bad we are and how Jehovah will kill us if we do this or that, From the platform here was always somebody addressing something very specific about some event in our school, and there was always some idiot who had a problem with any of his children attending, so it was always "wordly" and JWs cannot attend.
The elders in the congregation didn't like each other and refused to have their children socialize with other children. Personally I didn't like the attitude of some of them, especially the older ones. The feeling seemed mutual.
The gossiping was insane! People were so much into each other's business to a point that I as a child even noticed.
Then my father seemed to be the only one stating that the end was not coming in 1975. He became unpopular for doing so in the congregation. One of the elders quit his job in 1975, and became a pioneer in October (in spite of having to support his 13 children). He also trained himself to eat leaves for when the great tribulation arrives. Some people sold their houses.
Another elder was some kind of stalker and was constantly following people he became obsessed with.
Pioneering was a lot more hours a month. They used to call it "temporary pioneering" when a JW decided to dedicate a month to pioneering. The requirement was 100 hours of house to house preaching. Later there was a "major" announcement, you know, one of those events when they mislead people to believe that they are going to say something that will change life as we know it, to change the requirement to 60 hours.
The visits of the CO were a major event. They were received as semi-gods. People were very competitive over hosting the CO for lunch, but only on the Sunday, his last day. People were recommended and named elders and for other "privileges" based on how they came across. There was this one moron who knew nothing about anything, that became an elder. It was a horrendous experience. Seeing them talking out of his butt, incoherently, without making sense, and always over the allotted time, was just painful. But, he was an elder, and he was "appointed by Jehovah", so people just took it.
The assemblies were very complicated in terms of all the work involved. The decorations in the stadiums were very flowery, the food they prepared was cooked and it was an entire menu. The cheesy dramas were as complicated as they were inappropriate for children (they really don't give a fuck about children). They were also longer in duration.
To those younger, the way they started talking about "the dangers of the Internet" when it became mainstream, they also attacked TV. They were always criticizing and attacking anything that was popular on TV, regardless of the content.
People who were creative or had a mind on their own, or ask questions were shamed for doing or being so. Some were physically punished (beaten) by their parents for expressing interest in higher education or in a hobby.
Preaching in a rural area was fun because I got to ride my bike. Living communities are spread out, so when I didn't get to use my bike (actually, not mine, I'd borrow one; my parents thought that bikes were evil), I liked when we had to go to farther territories because that meant less time doing house to house work.
There was a gestapo-like attitude around finding out if anyone in the congregation was doing something that is considered an offense. People were not close to each other and there was no trust. When something about someone was found out, every single person knew about it and more, as gossip always has the tendency of growing in the exaggeration direction. When a person was disfellowshipped, they used to say for what exactly over the platform.
And that's how they expected me to like being a JW.
yes, that's what he just told me.
unbelievable.
this cult had no shame.. 😞😞😞 .
He has no idea what's really going on with the organization. I feel bad about that of course. I don't like that they have convinced him that sitting out in the hot sun for no reason is time well spent when he could be out fishing or something fun which I'm sure he would prefer. I just needed to vent a little. Thanks for listening.
Yes, the cult has no shame, that's what makes it a cult. This is the case with many people, especially the elderly. Many congregations celebrate having them on display like that. Sometimes they showcase their "experience" or have them noted in one way or another.
My 80-something father is in the exact same place.
battery technology has been making leaps and bounds in affordability and energy output throughout the past decade.
while pure electric cars currently have limited range, the near future holds prospects for longer ranges.
hybrids, and recently plug in hybrids, have a mileage of up to 50 mpg* giving them a range of 500 miles from a ten gallon gas tank.
Electric cars are a good alternative, but unfortunately that technology is not being explored as much as the current gas/oil based car manufacturing. In some parts of USA it was politicized (I even saw commercials suggesting that having an electric car is "liberal" and unpatriotic).
From a technology perspective, it's very interesting to see the way they work. From a convenience perspective, I'd prefer to let their engineering mature a little more an perfect certain things.
good morning, all.. it is good to be here.. thanks to all for your contributions.. love and blessings.
sylvia.
Good morning snowbird. That was very sweet of you.
how many in your age group are still jehovahs witnesses?
from where we are at, there aren't many left.
each year it gets smaller and smaller haha .
Don't know, don't care. I'm out, that's all I know.
when growing up in a "proper" j.ws household:-.
a) our moral opinions are conditioned by this environment and upbringing.. b) to hold to jws belief and moral opinions gives our life purpose.. c) what we believe we hold it to be true.. d) in terms of approval it can be difficult for the mind to accept logical evidence if our life is based on "truth" and " moral opinions" that conflict with our conscience.. anyway i am not sure where i am going with this o.p?.
i guess my point is that settling factual and logical disputes with jws has proven more challenging than i realized.
I guess my point is that settling factual and logical disputes with Jws has proven more challenging than I realized. In order to explain this I illustrated my point with those born in . But the same argument can be used on any convert of a belief or moral system.
Yes, reasoning with facts is the one thing that brainwashing takes away. I have posted in other threads about how one can get a better result when you address their feelings, not what they reason. People cannot join an organization based on reasoning that they have not yet learned. What makes them join and stay is what the Wt makes the feel, being that comfort, hope, a sense of certainty, etc. If you argue that instead of what the bible says in some of its books, I'm sure you may get a better/stronger reaction.
My conclusion is it is not always that a poster is deliberately argumentative, when they fail to offer convincing reasons to justify a belief or moral opinion. The trick is to know when we are not going to convince someone on the validity of our argument
Looking from a knowledge-only perspective, absolutely. The "argumentative" part comes from them defending the thing that to them represents important life changing decisions that they have made. A person cannot automatically say "Sure, you're right. My son died because we didn't have him get a transfusion, I never pursued any financial goal, career aspiration, and had to marry this passive/aggressive ____ out of pressure from my congregation peers, and I have dedicated all my life and made all my important life decisions around what I argue, but no problem. You're right; I'll just make a change in believe system and life changing decision making because of what you just showed me". That cannot happen. What they defend is what they feel, not what they know.
i see serena williams is pregnant, not married and is she still a jehovahs witness?
if i have all this correct why is she not disfellowshipped?
more jw bull shit?
Serena Williams is not a JW.